Learning to Speak
by InkDragoness
Summary: Silence. Fragile, shattered by the merest sound. But the silence after the sound is always stronger. A mute girl is taken to become the Far-East branch's first New-Type. Song wanted to become stronger to protect the ones she loves, but she has to surmount her personal fears to get there. It doesn't help that she grew closer to someone who doesn't want anyone to be close. SomaxOC
1. I

Hello and welcome to Learning to Speak! This is my first ongoing story for Gods Eater Burst. I love the game so much! XD My name's InkDragoness, but you can call me Inky. I hope you enjoy the story!

**Disclaimer**: Gods Eater Burst does not belong to me, but the OC does.

**Cover Credit**: Cover created by me. Title font used: Birth of a Hero, by Last Soundtrack. dafont (.com) / birth-of-a-hero (.font) (remove brackets and spaces)

* * *

I

**Soma**

"We've got to move quickly." Lindow said, his calm voice unaffected by the looming disaster. "There are civilians nearby and the Ogretails are advancing quickly."

"Understood!" Sakuya replied smartly.

I sighed. Great. Yet another attack on the Ghetto by the Aragami. At least they were just Ogretails.

"Sakuya, I want you to go straight to the ghetto and see if any medical help is needed. Soma, head to the northern quadrant of the Ghetto and eliminate any Ogretails you see. I'll follow Sakuya until she reaches the Ghetto, then I will take the southern quadrant."

I nodded, heading off towards my destination at a brisk jog. By the time I reached the north quadrant I'd already taken out six Ogretails and a Cocoon Maiden that happened to be nearby. I met no civilians or dead bodies on the way, so that hopefully meant that everyone had been in the main Ghetto before the Ogretails attacked.

I stood in the silence of the quadrant, wondering if I should leave and search for the Ogretails. Damn Lindow. He must have taken the gate with all the Ogretail.

The silence was broken by the sound of footsteps. I turned, seeing a girl running towards me. She had wild purple eyes and startlingly white hair. But what was the most unusual were the three giant gashes on her cheek leaking blood onto her pale skin.

She ran fearlessly up to me, grabbing my arm as she tried to drag me in the direction she had just come from.

"What do you want?" I growled, snapping my arm out of her grasp.

The girl flinched, purple eyes widening a little in fear. But she seemed to shake it off, grabbing my arm again and trying to drag me away. I stood firm despite the insistent tugging.

She gave up, letting go of my arm. She gestured wildly in the direction she had tried to drag me to. Her movements were intense and flurried.

"Tell me what's wrong." I commanded.

The girl grew more flustered and panicked. She started gesturing with her hands, weird fluttering movements that meant nothing to me.

"I don't have time for this!" I snapped, turning my back on her. There were Ogretails to be dealt with.

Suddenly I heard the pounding of footsteps. When I turned, the girl was running away.

Right towards an Ogretail.

"Wait!" I yelled. She paid no heed, continuing to charge forwards.

With a curse I followed.

I thought that I would be able to catch up to her before the Ogretail caught her, but she was _fast_. I was quite a distance away when the Ogretail turned, stomping its feet as it growled. It had seen her and was ready to battle. Unfazed, the girl kept going. It was only once the Ogretail pounced that she reacted.

She threw herself to the ground, using the momentum she had gained from running to roll under the Aragami. The Ogretail flew right over, landing right in my path.

I dispatched it easily. By the time I was done the girl was standing farther ahead, waving her arms like crazy. She must have noticed me following her.

I hated being led around, but I ran up to her. She grabbed my arm as if to prevent me from escaping—even though I had easily gotten out of her grasp before—and continued running.

She led me farther around the Outer Ghetto, stopping at the bottom of an abandoned building, letting go of my arm. She looked around as if surprised to find that something was missing.

I watched as she picked up a rock from the ground, tossing it against the side of the building. The rock hit with a resounding thud.

_Could that be a signal?_ I wondered, guessing that that was the only reasonable explanation for such strange behaviour.

A head popped over the side of the building, proving my theory.

"Song!" The little girl cried joyously. Then her gaze turned to me. "Oh, and you brought a Gods Eater! That's good, but the tiger left!"

_Tiger?_ I wondered. Then I heard a savage growl.

The girl and I turned at the same time. I readied my God Arc.

Standing across from us was a Vajra.


	2. II

II

**?**

"Run." The Gods Eater commanded me, settling into a battle stance in front of me.

I nodded, though I doubted that he could see it. Instead I ran to the side, watching as the giant tiger's eyes followed me hungrily, though it quickly returned to the dangerous hunter.

As the Gods Eater leapt into action, I gingerly touched my face. The scratch—okay, it was more serious than a scratch—had been left there by that cat.

It had all started when I took Aiko for a walk. Aiko loved to explore the Outer Ghetto. I always accompanied her, of course. I would never be able to ever look Aiko's mother in the eye if I let something happen to her. Aiko's mother had practically adopted me when my parents died. The least I could do was keep her safe.

So that was why when the tiger attacked I had distracted it while Aiko climbed to the top of the building. When she had reached the top, she threw down a rock, gaining the attention of the giant cat while I ran to go find a Gods Eater.

And now the Gods Eater was fighting savagely against the Aragami.

I watched as he easily used the giant sword, which I would never be able to pick up on my own. But, even though he delivered crushing blows to the tiger's head, I could tell that he was tiring. I didn't know what kind of Aragami that was, but it looked dangerous. That Gods Eater had handled an Ogretail easily; but this beast was giving him a run for his money.

I gasped as the tiger swept a paw, knocking the Gods Eater to the ground.

My body reacted on its own accord. I couldn't yell, but I needed to distract the Aragami. So I bent down, grabbed a rock, and tossed it.

By some luck the rock hit the tiger in the head, not doing any serious damage to its seemingly iron-plated face. But the hit still managed to distract it. Both the Gods Eater's and the tiger's gazes turned to me, shock and anger reflected in each.

"I told you to run!" The Gods Eater yelled at me, struggling to get to his feet.

But it was too late. The tiger charged. I felt the claws pierce my chest before I saw it. I was unconscious before I hit the ground.

X

I awoke with a gasp.

"Song!" Aiko cried, falling onto me and wrapping me in her tiny arms.

I let myself relax. I was alive, and so was Aiko. While she hugged me, I took the opportunity to look around. I definitely wasn't in the Ghetto anymore. A dark green curtain surrounded us, and I realized that I was on a bed. Was I in some sort of hospital?

Aiko drew back from me with a smile. "I'm going to go get mommy!" she said as she parted the curtains and left.

_Mrs. Oguri is here?_ I wondered, trying to sit up. I didn't make it far before I groaned, clutching my chest. My fingers touched the rough fabric of bandages, and I looked down to see that my whole chest was covered in them. By some willpower I still managed to sit up, though it hurt to do so.

I suddenly remembered that tiger's attack. I'd passed out when the Aragami slashed me… Wait. Was that Gods Eater okay? Surely if I was fine he would be alright too.

Mrs. Oguri entered, accompanied by Aiko and another man. I assumed that the man was the doctor, mostly due to the white robes he wore, though they looked a little fancy for a hospital.

"Hello. I am Johannes von Schicksal, director of the Far East Fenrir Branch." The man introduced himself.

Okay, so he wasn't a doctor. He was definitely more impressive than that.

"I heard from Mrs. Oguri that your name is Song." The director continued. "It is quite a coincidence that Soma found you. We were going to go to fetch you anyway."

I stared at him, confused. The look on Mrs. Oguri's face worried me. It was a mixture between admiration and pity.

Seeing my confused look, Mr. von Schicksal added, "You have been selected as a candidate for a New-Type Gods Eater."

His words sent a shock down my body. Me? A Gods Eater? Never mind New-Type, whatever that was supposed to mean, but me, a Gods Eater?

I caught Mrs. Oguri's eye, my signal for me wanting to talk. She nodded, and I raised my hands, despite the weakness I felt.

I began to signal. Everyone watched, although I'm sure that only Mrs. Oguri and Aiko understood.

"She says, 'I think you got something wrong. I am not a Gods Eater.'" Mrs. Oguri translated.

The director smiled. "I had forgotten that you were mute. Unfortunately, our database is never wrong. You will soon see that there are certain advantages to being a Gods Eater. For example, we offer protection to the families of Gods Eaters…or their guardians."

Protection.

My fingers dug into the rough sheet over my legs. Protection. My parents could have used a Gods Eater to protect them.

My thoughts were interrupted by Mrs. Oguri. In sign language she said, "Don't do this just for us."

I smiled. Then I signed back, "I'm not doing this just for you. For my parents too."

Mrs. Oguri opened her mouth as if to say something, paused, then shut it. Eventually she signed, "Are you sure?"

I answered that with a nod.

"She accepts." Mrs. Oguri said bitterly.

"A good choice." Johannes nodded briskly. "I will leave you alone for now."

With that said, von Schicksal left.

"So are you going to be like that guy who fought that tiger?" Aiko asked, her eyes sparkling.

I nodded.

"Cool!" Aiko jumped up and down in her seat, earning a smile for me. "I bet you're gonna be the best Gods Eater to ever exist!"

"Thank you." I replied in sign language.

"Now, now, Aiko." Mrs. Oguri admonished. "Don't get too excited. You're going to have to go to bed soon. We're leaving tomorrow."

"But mom!" Aiko exclaimed. "Song just woke up!"

I looked at Mrs. Oguri in shock. "You are leaving?" My hands trembled slightly as I 'said' this.

Mrs. Oguri smiled weakly. "The Branch is only for Gods Eaters and the people who work with them. We're heading back to the Ghetto tomorrow."

I looked at her blankly, a feeling of dread crawling up my spine. An attack on the Ghetto was what landed me here. Surely it couldn't be safe for them alone. Not that I had done much for protection anyway…

As if she could tell that I was worried, Mrs. Oguri said, "Oh, c'mon Song! I'm sure with you as a Gods Eater, we'll have nothing to worry about!"

I stared at her. What was with the sudden change in attitude? Unless… My eyes slid down to Aiko, who was standing beside her mother, hand in hand. Was it for Aiko's sake?

"Alright, Aiko." Mrs. Oguri said. "Time for bed!"

"But…" Aiko looked up at her mother pleadingly. Then she pulled her hand away, came to stand on the chair beside my bed, and hugged me.

"Make sure you come and visit, Song!" She chirped. "Bye!"

"Take care of yourself." Mrs. Oguri said, giving me a very serious look that told me everything she wanted to say but couldn't in Aiko's presence. "I'm sure your parents would be very proud."

I watched as Aiko took Mrs. Oguri's hand and left, willing myself not to cry.

x

The next few days were a whirlwind of information and introductions. Dr. Paylor Sakaki introduced himself the day after Aiko and Mrs. Oguri left, launching straight into lectures about Gods Eaters. The moment I was healthy enough to move I was introduced to a God Arc.

And, just like that, I became a Gods Eater.


	3. III

III

**Song**

My first mission.

I stood on a ledge overlooking the City of Mercy accompanied by a man who had introduced himself earlier as Lindow. I was nervous, to say the least. The only combat I'd experienced was in tutorials.

"Boy, this place has seen better times, huh?" Lindow said amiably.

I nodded. It was true. The buildings were full of holes, as if a giant monster had taken bites out of them. But, then again, that was probably a pretty accurate assumption.

"Hey rookie, we're gonna start the simulation now. You got 3 orders… Don't die. If your number's up, get out. Lastly, hide. If you're lucky, catch the enemy off guard and blast it." Lindow paused. "Wait, is that 4?"

I gulped. How...straightforward.

"The bottom line is, you've got to survive." Lindow fixed his green-grey eyes on mine, his gaze intense despite his easy-going manner. "Just follow that order, and everything else will be fine."

I nodded, despite my nervousness. I would be fine. Perfectly fine. My right hand was wielding a weapon made of the same thing Aragami are made of and I have a simple bracelet to stop it from taking over my body. We were going after the same type of Aragami that had attacked the Ghetto a week ago, which caused a chain-effect that ended with me in hospital and ultimately with me in this exact position.

Yeah, perfectly fine.

"Hey, don't be nervous!" Lindow laughed. He must have seen the expression on my face. "If you need help, call for help! Or, er…in your case, I guess just run …and I'll probably get the hint. You can send signals through your armlet, but that's pretty limited. All right, let's get this show on the road!"

Lindow jumped off the cliff, followed closely by me. He looked back to make sure I followed him before saying, "Alright New-Type! Time to lead!"

I stared at him, pointing at myself uncertainly. Me, lead?

Lindow laughed. "It's just an Ogretail! Plus, I lead _all_ the time. I want to see what a New-Type can do!"

I nodded, even though I felt sick to the stomach. Stepping in front of Lindow, I walked uncertainly to the right, keeping my eyes wide open for any sign of the Aragami.

Finally, reaching the corner of the building, I saw it.

It had a fierce look in its beady yellow eye, along with two giant tusks sprouting upwards from the bottom of its jaw. Its back and neck was covered in shaggy tan fur, while its face seemed to be coated in hard white bone, similar to its paddle-like tail. Two deadly-looking claws adorned its black legs.

"Ready?" Lindow whispered from behind me. "It's time to test your skills."

In response I stepped from behind the corner, gaining the Ogretails attention.

"Alright!" Lindow exclaimed. "That's what I like to…uh, hear!"

I charged towards the Ogretail, diving right into battle. Hesitating wasn't going to help here.

Somehow, swinging my Short Blade and feeling it connect with Aragami flesh was…soothing. I know that it sounded bloodthirsty, but somehow being able to face an Aragami and actually do damage was redeeming. As if maybe I could somehow make up for my parents' death…

_No, don't think about that!_ I thought, jumping back from the Ogretail. I tried to calm the sorrow that was rising from my heart. Now was not the time to concentrate on that.

"You're doing great!" Lindow called, rushing forward and delivering a crushing blow with his blade that obviously did much more damage than my attacks had. "Why don't you try the Gun Form now?"

I had no idea how Lindow had known I was in the process of panicking. Maybe he had been with so many rookies that he could just tell.

But, thankful for the distraction from my depressing thoughts, I switched to Gun Form.

My first couple shots missed, but once I got used to the difference in attacking I managed to hit at least 3 out of 4 times.

However it didn't take long for me to tire of shooting and switch back to Blade Form. The feeling of power returned. It was as if I'd finally found my calling.

The adrenaline was still pumping when the Ogretail went down and heaved its final breath.

"Hey, that was an easy victory, huh?" Lindow said with a big grin, coming to stand beside me. "Good job, rookie. Now, to truly kill the Aragami, you have to devour from it. This will take its core and you'll get some useful materials in the process."

To show me how it's done, Lindow allowed his God Arc to devour from the Ogretail. I followed the steps, watching in amazement as a huge, black mouth sprouted from my blade and hungrily ate from the fallen Ogretail.

"Well." Lindow grinned, shouldering his giant blade. "Not bad for your first time, rookie."

x

"Hey…you want some gum?"

I looked to the side. Sitting beside me was a strange guy. He was wearing a yellow tuque striped with orange to match his orange hair, along with a slightly girly shirt that was cut open over his stomach.

Before I could answer, the boy tapped his pocket, then made a face. "Oh, I'm all out. Looks like I just used the last piece. Sorry 'bout that."

I smiled to show that it was okay.

"I am Kota Fujiki. And…" He looked at me, confused. "You look kinda familiar."

I smiled at that, but really, there was no way to answer him. I had no idea who he was.

"Hmmm…. White hair, purple eyes, pretty distinctive. " Kota looked up at the ceiling, as if that would help him remember. "Wait a second! I know you! You're that mute girl!"

I stared at him. Wait, he knew me? Then that would mean he must be from the Ghetto!

I nodded vigorously.

"Oh, cool!" Kota said with a grin. Then he started making gestures with his hands in a language all-too familiar to me. –Wow, this is so cool! I never thought I would meet you!-

-You know sign language?- I asked with a smile.

"Yeah!" Kota replied. "It's actually really popular with kids in the Ghetto, at least where I live. It was kinda like our secret code for when adults were around. The only reason we know it is because one of the kids knew a girl who'd gone mute and was using that language. So we thought we could use it too!"

My smile grew wider. Finally, someone who could understand me!

"So I guess you're here for the lecture, right?" Kota asked.

I nodded. Even though I'd already gotten a lot of info from Dr. Sakaki when he was visiting me in the hospital, apparently there was still more to learn.

"That's cool!" Kota grinned. "Since we're both rookies, I guess we'll be attending a lot of lectures together. If we get bored we can talk to each other using sign language!"

-I was actually planning on listening.- I informed Kota with a sheepish smile on my face.

"Nonsense!" He clapped me on the back. "Geez, you're a real goody-two-shoes, aren't you? Don't worry, I'm sure that you'll get bored enough! Then we can talk!"

The door in front of us opened, and I was met with the familiar sight of Dr. Sakaki. He looked down at us with a kind smile on his face. "Getting along? Well, doesn't matter. I'm ready for the lecture!"

x

One informative lecture on Aragami later and I was ready for my next mission.

But first, I did another mission with Lindow called 'Fallen Angel Egg' where I hunted something called a Zygote. It was actually pretty easy, despite the fact that I had a lot more trouble shooting something out of mid-air.

The whole point of doing that mission was to get the mission reward. I needed a Brittle Titanium. Once I got it, I was able to upgrade my Knife into a Knife II. And then, only then, was I ready to take on a mission with the mysterious Sakuya Tachibana.

x

A more desolate place I had never seen.

The Wailing Plains was a very accurate name for this place. In the middle on the Plains was what looked like a jagged volcano, although instead of fire spewing from it, a giant black tornado swirled towards the sky. I met Sakuya at an outcropping facing the jagged mountain.

"Ah, so you're the new recruit!" She greeted me with a kind smile.

She had short, straight black hair that framed a pale face. Her outfit was black and green, and she held a giant gun propped on her shoulder.

"My name's Sakuya Tachibana. Nice to meet you!"

I smiled in response. I guess that that one Gods Eater must have been a special exception. It seemed like everyone else was nice.

Sakuya looked intently at my face. "Are you nervous?" She chuckled, tapping on my shoulder. "You need to relax. Or you'll find yourself freezing up at crucial times."

Suddenly a harsh roar shattered the relative peace of the Plains. Sakuya flinched. "All right, I'm going to brief you now. During this mission, you're going to take the lead. I'll be backing you from the rear."

So maybe Lindow forcing me to take the lead earlier was practice for this mission.

"This is basic strategy for teaming up with a Gods Eater with a long-distance God Arc, so don't forget it. And don't get too far ahead. Always stay within firing range of your backup. OK?"

I nodded. It was a lot to keep track of, but most of it was common sense.

"Good, you do as you're told. I'm counting on you. All right, let's begin."

I had to smile at this. Maybe Kota was right in saying that I was a goody-two-shoes. But, no matter. I jumped down from the ledge, Sakuya following closely behind.

I headed to the left first, following the round track that surrounded the volcano. It wasn't long before I saw the target: a Cocoon Maiden. It had a petite, human-like face. But that was where the human resemblance ended.

"Cocoon Maidens are immobile, but don't underestimate them." Sakuya informed me. "When they open their shroud-like body, they can shoot needles that will inflict a debuff on you. They can also shoot lasers. When attacking them, be careful, because they are by no means defenseless."

I nodded, charging at the Aragami.

x

_Not bad for the first day. _I thought as I returned from the mission, exhausted. After depositing my spoils into the Storage, I headed off to bed.

_Mrs. Oguri, Aiko…_ I thought as I closed my eyes. _I think I did good today._

With that thought I fell asleep, ready for another busy day tomorrow.


	4. IV

IV

**Song**

"Hey Song!"

I looked up. It was Kota, carrying a tray of food. "Can I sit here?"

I nodded, gesturing to the place across from me.

It was breakfast at the Fenrir Far East Branch. I discovered that it was quite a noisy ordeal. However, I still managed to find an empty table. Well, until Kota showed up. I actually liked Kota. Maybe having him be the only person to be able to understand you brought people closer together.

"So, did you have fun yesterday?" He asked, taking a bite out of a bagel.

I nodded as I replied, -It was fun, but also kind of scary.-

Kota grinned at that. "Yeah, I know what you mean! Don't worry, I think that in no time we'll be just as great as they are!"

I smiled. Kota was a very optimistic and energetic person, it seems.

"Hey rookies!" Lindow's familiar voice brought my attention to him. He was walking towards us, accompanied by Sakuya. "Mind if we join you?"

I shook my head no as Kota said, "No, not at all!", all the while eyeing Sakuya.

"Great!" Lindow answered, taking a seat beside me. Sakuya sat beside Kota, which he seemed pretty happy about.

"So, did you guys enjoy your missions?" Sakuya asked.

I nodded, while Kota replied affirmative.

"Well, that's good!" Lindow laughed. "Because from now on you're going to be doing a lot of them, and they're just gonna get harder and harder!"

"Yikes!" Kota exclaimed, earning a giggle from Sakuya.

"Don't worry, you can upgrade your weapons." Lindow said with a smile. "Did you guys figure out how to do that yet?"

I caught Kota's eye, just to make sure he was looking at me. Then I said –I upgraded my sword already.-

Lindow and Sakuya looked at me curiously.

"She says that she upgraded her sword already." Kota explained.

"Whoah, you can understand her?!" Lindow exclaimed, looking at me with a very interested gaze.

"Yeah!" Kota answered, obviously proud that he knew something that Lindow didn't. "It's called sign language!"

"How…interesting." Sakuya piped up. Then she looked at me. "You should teach this to me sometime."

"Oh, I can teach it to you, Sakuya!" Kota stretched, putting his arms behind his head. "I'm a good teacher! You know, I was the one who taught it to all of my friends back in the Ghetto!"

I frowned. Why was Kota lying? He had said that a little boy had taught them sign language. Plus, he was acting really weird around Sakuya.

"So, Song." Lindow said, looking at me. "You have a mission with Soma today, don't you? It will be a nice reunion."

-Reunion?- I asked. Kota repeated my question.

Lindow looked at me confused, and then he laughed. "Wow, I guess you guys were never introduced! He's the guy that saved you from the Vajra!"

I felt panicked. Wow! I'd been there for a whole week and it had never occurred to me to go find him and say thank you! Oh my god! But wait…was he okay? He had gotten hurt when fighting the 'Vajra'!

I fired off the question, my hands moving quickly because of my flustered state.

"Whoah, Song!" Kota exclaimed. "I can't tell what you're saying when you go that fast!"

Lindow started laughing, obviously enjoying my panic. Blushing, I calmed down a little, and repeated my question.

"She wants to know if he's okay." Kota finally translated.

Lindow's laughter turned hysterical at that point. "You were the one who came here unconscious and bleeding like crazy and you were worried about _him_?!"

"Stop picking on her, Lindow!" Sakuya exclaimed, although Lindow ignored her, still laughing like crazy. Everyone was staring at us now, and I felt my blush deepen.

Lindow eventually stopped laughing, wiping a tear from his eye. Then he looked at the expression on my face and almost started laughing again. "Geez! You're pretty calm during missions, but now you're all flustered!"

I bit my bottom lip, saying -I never got to thank him.- to explain my actions. Kota, diligent as always, repeated it out loud.

"Well, I guess you'll get an opportunity to thank him during your mission." Sakuya said, that ever-present kind smile on her face. "Or you could go thank him right now. He's sitting over there."

I looked in the direction she was pointing at, and, sure enough, there he was, sitting at a table all by his lonesome. He had a hood over his face, but it was undeniably him. I recognized the tan hand that was grasping a fork and the white hair peeking from behind his hood.

"Well, go say thank you!" Lindow said, tapping me on my back.

But for some reason I couldn't move. I could just stare at him while I panicked. Usually I was brave, but now I just couldn't get my legs to move.

Soma turned, glaring at me with ice-blue eyes. At that moment my muscles snapped back into movement, though it was only to turn away. My face felt warm, and I realized with horror that I was blushing.

Lindow started laughing again. This was probably the most entertaining breakfast he'd ever had. "You can stare an Ogretail in the face, but you're scared of Soma?"

"He is pretty scary, Lindow." Sakuya admonished. "And it doesn't help that he glared at her."

"Oh, I just can't wait to hear the tales of this mission!" Lindow exclaimed.

x

At the Sunken Grid, I was met by two guys.

Soma I recognized instantly. He was standing off in the distance, trying his best to ignore the other boy as he chattered on. The moment I took a couple of steps forward, the other boy noticed and came running in my direction.

He had a bright red head of hair, which matched the open vest he wore. Nothing was underneath, so I got an eyeful of skin covered in ornate tattoos.

"Hey, are you the new rookie we've been hearing so much about? I'm Eric. Eric der Vogelweid."

I smiled weakly at this. He was…interesting, to say the least. His tone was completely snobby, and he kept running his hand through his hair as if he was worried that his every movement was messing it up.

"I suggest you take your cues from me and learn to battle gloriously for humankind…" Eric continued.

Somehow my brain registered Soma move into a battle stance, even though he was standing far behind Eric.

"Eric! Above you!" Soma yelled, and I felt a chill go down my spine.

I jumped back as Eric looked up, my gaze following his.

An Ogretail was leaping straight towards him.

The Ogretail landed, knocking Eric to the ground. I could only watch in horror as Eric screamed, the Ogretail taking a huge bite out of his arm.

"Don't just stand there!" Soma yelled, but I barely registered it. I could just stare at the ground, where the Ogretail was feasting on a now-unconscious Eric.

_No, I can't watch this! _I staggered back a couple steps. Despite my thought, I couldn't keep my eyes off of it. The horror of what was happening combined with old guilt that was bubbling up anew.

There was someone dying in front of me. And I couldn't do anything about it.

Just like my parents.

I saw Soma's blade dig deep into the Ogretail, but it didn't stop its feeding. Before Soma could take it down, it had already eaten Eric.

I stared at the scene, feeling my legs shaking. Soma seemed perfectly calm, though I noticed that he was still staring at the Ogretail, an unreadable expression in his eyes.

A person had just died. Right in front of me.

And, even though I was a Gods Eater, I couldn't do anything about it.

The helplessness bubbled up inside me. How could I ever hope to save people if, when I'd gotten the power to do so, I'd just frozen and stared?

I felt like I was going to be sick.

"Welcome to this godawful workplace." Soma said, still staring at the Ogretail's limp body.

I didn't even look at him. The Aragami's corpse held me in a trance. It'd just eaten Eric…Eric had just died…I'd done nothing.

"I'm Soma. Not that you need to remember that."

That statement was enough to draw my attention away from the body and onto Soma. He was looking at me so chillingly. "Sorry to break it to you, but this kind of thing happens on a daily basis here."

Suddenly he brought his blade off his shoulder, pointing it directly at me. It was so close I could see tiny scratches on the blade. "What kind of place did _you_ think it was gonna be?"

Seeing my horrified look, he smirked, withdrawing his blade and placing it back on his shoulder. "Just kidding… Time's up. Let's go, rookie."

Soma turned his back, and I tried to sort my tangled thoughts. I decided that panicking wasn't the best thing to do here. I needed to stay focused…the mission called for the elimination of 2 Ogretails and 2 Cocoon Maidens. I'd only taken them on separately, but these were going to be in a pack. It was going to be tough.

"If you don't want to die, just stay out of my way as much as possible..." Soma said chillingly. He began to walk away.

I ran, grabbing his arm. He growled, turning around and snapping it out of my grasp. "What do you want?"

Trying to avoid panicking at his response, I rummaged through my bag. I found the notebook I'd brought with me specifically for this occasion, flipping it to the first page.

I saw him read what I'd written on the page. I knew the words by heart; there had been so many rewrites because I hadn't been sure of what to say. Eventually I'd just given up and wrote this:

Thank you for saving Aiko and I a week ago.

Soma glanced up. "Kind of ironic, saying thank you for saving you when someone just died, don't you think?"

I felt my face go red. _No no no! I knew it wasn't the right time to say that! Stupid Song, stupid!_

Soma smirked. "But I guess you're welcome. C'mon rookie. We've got business to attend to."

I tried to calm myself down. Okay, he hadn't gotten _that_ upset. I stashed the notepad back into my pack and ran after him.


	5. V

V

**Soma**

I was greeted by the sight of two Ogretails standing side by side and two Cocoon Maidens on raised platforms. I had hoped that the Ogretail I'd taken out earlier was one of our targets. But I guess that one had been an unforeseen enemy.

I headed straight for a Cocoon Maiden, seeing Song go at an Ogretail. She was using a Short Blade, and I saw why. She used the speed to her advantage, quick to attack but also quick to defend.

But I needed to concentrate on battle. I'd taken out plenty of Cocoon Maidens and Ogretails on my own, but now I had a rookie in my way.

Before long I got the message that an Ogretail was defeated, and I cursed under my breath. There was no way a rookie was going to show me up. I finished off the Cocoon Maiden, joining Song as she took on the next Ogretail. She was looking significantly more tired than at the beginning of the mission, and I realized that she must have been pushing really hard.

The Ogretail fell easily, and we moved on to finish the Cocoon Maiden together.

x

I'm sorry about Eric.

I stared at the notepad that had been shoved right into my line of sight. I usually made a point of looking down when eating, but I guess that that was just more of an invitation for Song to shove her little notebook in my face.

I looked up, glaring. Song flinched, purple eyes unsure. But she somehow still found the courage to stick by, sitting down across from me as she took the notepad back.

"Go away." I growled. "Just because we did a mission together doesn't mean we're friends."

A flush rose to her cheeks, but she didn't budge. She flipped the page on her notebook, once again showing it to me.

I should have done something, but I was scared.

I narrowed my eyes. "There's no place for fear in our job."

Song bit her bottom lip, flipping the page on her notepad again.

I'm a coward.

I stop mid-bite, staring at the text. When I looked up, Song was smiling kind of sheepishly. She flipped the page again.

Sorry to bother you.

Then she got up and left.

X

**Song**

"Look at you, New-Type!" Lindow greeted me as I came to sit by him. "Good job talking to Soma like that."

I smiled a little, but my heart wasn't into it. I was still bothered by Eric's death.

"Hey, I heard…" Kota began quietly, which was so unlike him. "…that your partner passed away."

I bit my lip. I guess the news of a death would have spread quickly.

"Mmm…I just don't think it would do any good…for both of us to be gloomy…" Kota smiled a little. "Mmm…don't worry! Let's be more confident! We're invincible! Anyway, I just want to say… Let's try to buck up!"

I couldn't help but smile also. Even if Kota seemed brainless, he sure had a way with words.

"Never had a comrade die in front of you, huh?" Lindow asked.

I paused, unsure on how to answer. My parents had died in front of me. But if I nodded, it would seem like I was agreeing with him. If I shook my head no, it would seem like I was saying 'No, a comrade never died in front of me.'.

Being mute was complicated.

"Has it happened to you before, Song?" Sakuya asked. She must have realized my pause meant that. I nodded.

"Oh. Sorry about that." Lindow said awkwardly. "But anyway…I'm glad you talked to Soma. He's not very popular because he's blunt, but he is kind. He keeps his distance because he's terrified of seeing a comrade die in front of his eyes."

Both Kota and I looked at Lindow curiously, then at Soma. He was looking down at his plate of food like usual, quietly eating.

"Huh." Kota said, looking back at Lindow. "And I just thought he was a jerk."

I kicked Kota from under the table, earning a yelp from him.

"Whoah, what was that for, Song?" He asked angrily.

-There's no reason for you to be rude!-

"But admit it! He isn't very polite, don't cha think?"

Well, I couldn't say otherwise. Soma wasn't exactly very friendly.

"Well, whatever." Kota said. Then he suddenly whacked himself on the head. "Right! We have a mission together, Song! I can't wait to see how you fight!"

-I'm sure it will be fun!- I replied.

"Alright!" Kota yelled, jumping from his seat. "Let's go!"

With that, he grabbed my hand and dragged me towards the Den.

"Have fun, you two!" Sakuya called after us.

x

The frigid air of the Tranquil Temple greeted us as we stepped off the starting platform.

We had 3 Ogretails to deal with before we met the mysterious Kongou. I wondered why they were sending two rookies out against an enemy that no one had seen in a while. Hopefully it wouldn't be too difficult.

The Ogretails were handled with ease. All that was left now was the Kongou.

"Hey, Song." Kota said. I turned around to look at him. "You come from the Ghetto, right? Do you have any family there?"

I looked around, finding a ledge and pointing to it. We went to sit down and I put my God Arc down to 'speak'. -No direct family…my parents died when I was young. But I was adopted and now I have a mother and sister, you could say.-

"Oh…" Kota looked down. "I'm sorry about your parents…but if you have living family in the Ghetto, then you should understand what I'm talking about. I'm worried about this new enemy. I have to survive, but not for me…" Kota trailed off, looking off into the distance. "I don't know what my mom and sister would do if something happened to me, so I've got to watch out. You understand, right?"

I nodded. Mrs. Oguri was always telling me that I needed to watch out because she had made a promise to my parents to watch over me if something happened to them.

"Great!" Kota said, jumping to his feet. "Us Ghetto kids gotta stick together, right? All right! I'm getting all pumped up here! Let's go get that Kongou, Song!"

I smiled, enjoying his enthusiasm. I heard a faint roar in the distance, somehow knowing that that was the Kongou. Grabbing my God Arc, I headed off in that direction, followed closely by Kota.

We rounded the corner, and there it was. It looked like a gorilla, one of the animals in Aiko's book of jungle animals. On its face was a wicked looking red 'mask', and ornate red pipes decorated its shoulders and back. Its golden fur was matted into what seemed like swirls, its underside black to match its red-tipped tail.

"Let's do this!" Kota whispered. I nodded, stepping stealthily from behind the corner. The Kongou was eating and didn't notice.

Holding my breath, I walked closer until I was a few feet away. Then, I readied myself to devour.

The moment I did the Kongou whirled around. I quickly rolled away, switching to Gun Form. I launched the Aragami bullets Kota's way.

I launched off all my bolt::mortar bullets at the Kongou. I'd done some research before coming; apparently Kongous were weak to Spark.

After that, I switched back to Blade Form.

As I hacked away at the Kongou, I felt that same feeling that I'd felt on the mission with Lindow. Every time my blade connected I felt a little thrill. And, when the Kongou's Torso Unbounded, the only thing that stopped me from cheering was my muteness.

Whenever my OP bar filled, I would empty it back up again with Spark bullets. When the Kongou fled, I fearlessly chased after it. Somehow, the feeling of battling Aragami like this one seemed to complete me…it seemed to fill the hole that I'd had ever since my parents died.

However, the feeling did not last for long. The Kongou fell to our relentless attacks, and, after devouring its core and getting some Materials, I felt the feeling fade away.

Without the rush of whatever-it-was, I started to pant. Kota fell to the ground, tired but smiling.

"Whoa, awesome! My gun and your blade! We were totally in sync. We're the best team ever!" He exclaimed in between pants. "I'm gonna go home and brag to Nozomi! I'll tell her that I'm the defender of world peace!"

I smiled at that, collapsing to the ground beside him. We were going to leave soon enough, but for now resting seemed like a good idea.

"Hey, Song! What do you think this is?" Kota suddenly said, picking up two frozen pieces of…fabric? He handed it to me.

I couldn't really tell what it was—texture was no help because the pieces were frozen solid. I put the fabric and my God Arc down to talk.

-I don't know. It must be some of those Salvaged Materials.-

"Oh, I see." Kota said, picking up the fabric again. "You can have them, Song. They're probably for exchanging for clothes, and I'm fine with my clothes. You could use some new clothes, I think."

I smiled, taking them. But Kota was grinning at me in a weird way.

-Is something wrong?- I asked.

"No." Kota's grin just grew wider. "It's just…you're a little oblivious. I guess it _was _just a subtle insult."

I titled my head, confused, trying to figure out what he meant. But Kota didn't answer. He just stood up, that grin still on his face. "Well, let's go before you figure it out!"


	6. VI

VI

**Song**

Well, I guess the insult that Kota had said—which I still hadn't figured out—didn't matter. After all, the two nylon turned out to be very useful. With it, I got to exchange them for a Pansy Hoodie, which was basically a black hoodie with purple sleeves. Purple was my favourite colour, and the hoodie was so soft. Who said that Gods Eaters couldn't have a sense of style?

While on a clothes splurge, I got new pants also. They were called Reaper Slacks. Feeling pretty proud of myself, I headed off to the mess hall for supper.

Today's supper was meatloaf, corn on the cob, and mashed potatoes. I wasn't too crazy about the meatloaf, but the success of Kota and I's mission and the new clothes had put me in such a great mood that I didn't care.

As I was helping myself to a cob, I heard the name 'Eric'. Feeling a bit of guilt at the name, I listened closer to the conversation.

"That kid Eric wasn't a bad Gods Eater, so there has to be a reason why he was killed so easily. There's a "Death God" among us, and they're worse than Aragami. 'Cause you die if you team up with him! The name of this "Death God"… is Soma…" I jumped at the name. Death God? Soma? No, that must just be a stupid rumor! However, I couldn't stop myself from listening further. "Whenever he's around, the Aragami always come to you. People who get paired up with him usually die fast. But somehow, he's still alive. His Burst time is also really long too. See? He can't be human… He is Death."

I nearly dropped my corn. What a nasty rumor… But Lindow had said that Soma was really kind and afraid of people dying. A "Death God" didn't exist…right? And, even if it did, Soma couldn't be one.

My mood ruined by such talk, I walked to where Lindow, Sakuya, and Kota were sitting. I didn't make it there. Somehow, I found myself stopped dead beside Soma's table.

As I stood there trying to figure out why I had stopped or what to do, I heard Soma's familiar growl.

"What do you want, rookie?"

_What do I want?_ I wondered.

Well, he had noticed me already. So I sat across from him.

"Look, I don't know what your problem is, but _just leave me alone_."

I didn't answer. Soma didn't understand sign language, and I didn't really feel like dragging out my notepad. So, instead, I just took a bite out of my meatloaf.

Soma just growled, angrily taking a bite out of his meal. I wondered why he was so angry. I guess I was kind of just getting in his face, but…

I knew what it felt like to have people avoid you just because you were different. I was lucky because I had Aiko and Mrs. Oguri…but I didn't really see any friends of Soma.

But maybe I was being rude. I guess I would want to be left alone if I asked…but was that really a good reason to leave him alone? He wasn't a monster. He'd said "You're welcome" when I'd thanked him for saving me. A "Death God" would just ignore me. And then kill me, probably.

"Damn, you're over-friendly… And Lindow's sneaking around behind my back…" Soma growled.

I perked up at the mention of Lindow. Maybe that was why he was so snappish today…it wasn't just me annoying him lately. Plus, with the rumor circling around…

"Bastards—every last one of you!" Soma snarled.

I jumped at the vehemence in his voice. I couldn't stay here anymore, especially with him radiating such hatred…but I couldn't leave just yet. Taking my notepad, I quickly scrawled into my note pad:

I'm sorry to have angered you.

Soma didn't even bother looking at the notepad. So, I tore out the sheet and put it on the table, getting ready to leave. But, again, something stopped me. There was something I really needed to tell him.

So, opening a new page, I wrote my message, tore out the sheet, placed it by the other, and got the hell out of there.

X

**Soma**

_Stupid rookie! _I thought with a growl, savagely tearing into my corn on the cob. Did Lindow put her up to this?

"Hey Soma!"

Speak of the devil.

I looked up, glaring at the stupid Unit Leader. "What do you want?"

"Nothing in particular." Lindow said with a smile, sitting across from me in the exact position Song had taken earlier. "Just felt like hanging out."

"Why can't you bastards just leave me alone?" I growled.

Lindow grinned. "We're members of your Unit. We're supposed to stick together."

I glared. So he knew about Song's meddling. Otherwise he wouldn't have said "we".

"Oh, what's this?" Lindow asked, reaching for the papers Song had left on the table. He picked them up, reading them. A slow smile crossed his face. "Good girl."

"You put her up to this, didn't you?" I snarled.

Lindow looked affronted. "Of course not! Really, you did that to yourself the moment you saved her from that Vajra."

"What the hell do you mean?!"

"Oh come on." Lindow grinned. "No matter how rude you act towards her, she's already seen that you are kind. You wouldn't have saved her, otherwise."

I cursed. So basically she was going to bug me the whole time she was here. Just like a certain Leader sitting across from me.

"Well, you know what?" Lindow said, tapping the table with his fist as he stood up. "I'm leaving for more cheerful company. You know, Song's probably just a little insulted at your attitude towards her."

"Why should I care? She brings it on herself."

Lindow gave me a smile. I stared at him. That smile seemed to have a hidden meaning behind it. But I just couldn't figure out what he meant. Then he turned and left.

x

I had thought that retreating into my room would end the torture, but I was wrong.

A knock at the door forced a curse out of my mouth. I stood, questioning whether I should answer the door or not. Maybe it wasn't Lindow or Song.

That feeble hope deteriorated when I opened to find Song standing there.

I glared at her, and she smiled sheepishly.

I slammed the door in her face, stalking back to my bed and lying down.

Song didn't leave right away. I could hear her pacing and see the shadows of her feet. Eventually she stopped, completely still for a while. I wondered what she was doing until she pushed a paper under the door. Then I heard her run away.

_God damn it._ I thought, subconsciously standing up. I was angry at my actions, but I still stopped over and picked up the paper.

I was wondering if you wanted to go on a mission with Sakuya, Lindow, and I tomorrow. It's for hunting 1 Ogretail and 2 Cocoon Maidens.

I stared at the paper. I'd basically told her to fuck off and she invited me on a mission? There was something wrong with the new rookie.

I crumpled the paper into a ball and tossed it in the trash, plopping myself on the bed once again. For some reason her previous messages to me entered my mind. The first had been "I'm sorry to have angered you." and the second…

I frowned. So obviously she had heard that stupid rumor going around about Eric's death. And for some stupid reason she had thought that it had bothered. It didn't bother me. But I still remembered what she had written.

I don't think you are a death god.

X

**Song**

"Are you sure that Soma is going to show up?" Sakuya asked doubtfully.

We were waiting for him at the ledge overlooking the City of Mercy. I bit my lip. It had already been difficult enough to convince Lindow and Sakuya to wait here, mostly due to the language barrier.

I lifted both of my arms, bent at the elbow, titled slightly towards the right. My hands opened wide, and I wiggled my fingers.

Sakuya watched the movement, thinking for a second. "Is that…wait?"

I nodded, smiling.

"Yes!" Sakuya yelled. "I'm getting the hang of this!"

"What's fight again?" Lindow asked.

I brought both hands up and curled them into fists, very much like someone getting ready to fight. I crossed the fists twice.

"Like this?" Lindow asked, repeating the gesture. I nodded.

"That looks stupid."

I jumped, turning around. Soma was standing there, staring at us.

"Hey Soma!" Lindow said, not in the least disturbed by his insult. "Glad you showed up! Hey, I was thinking that maybe all of the 1st Unit should learn this. It would be a great way to communicate when we can't talk to each other."

"I'm not learning something like that." Soma narrowed his eyes.

"What if I order you to, as Leader?" Lindow replied, a victorious smirk on his lips.

"Bastard." Soma muttered under his breath. "C'mon, let's just get this mission over with. I don't even know why I bothered to come."

And with that he leapt off the ledge and into the City of Mercy.

I smiled. Well, at least he showed up.

"Well, we better go before he gets too far ahead." Lindow said, heading to the edge along with Sakuya. As he passed me, he patted me on the back with a grin.

I wondered what he meant, but that thought disappeared when I headed into battle.


	7. VII

VII

**Song**

"Everything seems to be in turmoil." Sakuya complained. "People are protesting against Fenrir, and it's like the Aragami have suddenly gotten stronger."

"But hey, at least we have Song with us!" Lindow said, laughing as my face went red.

"And me too, right?" Kota asked hopefully. Then his voice took on more of a whiny tone. "Geez, it was such a bummer! I didn't even get to go with you guys on that Gboro-Gboro mission! Tsubaki made me stay behind to take extra lessons."

"That's what you get for not paying attention!" Sakuya exclaimed while Lindow laughed.

I just smiled. Poor Kota. Even though he did bring it on himself.

"And I don't think I'm going to be able to go with you guys on the next mission, either!" Kota pouted. "Stupid Tsubaki!"

"Stupid Kota, more like." Sakuya replied.

"I guess we'll have to bring Soma with us." Lindow said, winking at me. I still didn't understand why he kept doing things like that whenever he mentioned Soma.

"Hey, Song." Sakuya suddenly said, putting down her spoon. "How would you say 'I like this soup'?"

I pointed a finger to my chest.

"That's I." Sakuya stated. I nodded.

I placed my open hand on my chest, withdrawing it as I bent my middle finger and touched it to my thumb, making a circle that only I could see. Next, I pointed to the soup.

"I like this." Sakuya said. I nodded. Then I added the sign for soup: my left hand curved into a bowl-like shape and my right hand made an 'h' shape. Using my right hand I scooped and brought it to my lips.

"Soup is exactly like spoon, isn't it?" Sakuya asked. I agreed. "And it's only if you want to be specific."

I nodded, then signed -Simple is better in sign language.-

"All right." Sakuya replied with a smile. She was a good student. I'd already taught her signs I deemed the most useful for communicating in battle. After a while, she'd asked for the more mundane signs, like soup.

Lindow, on the other hand, was having a bit of trouble. He would often get two similar signs—and sometimes complete opposites—mixed up. But Soma… I hadn't even taught him anything. Whenever I would approach him, he'd give me a glare that sent me skittering away. The only reason I'd been able to talk to him earlier was because I always had something that felt needed to be said… But to me it didn't really matter if he learned sign language or not.

"Kota Fujiki!" An angry voice pierced the commotion of the mess hall.

"Oh no." Kota said, putting his head to the table as he pulled his beanie farther down. "She found me."

Stalking towards us was Tsubaki. She held a clipboard in her hand and had a stern expression on her face.

"Hey sis!" Lindow greeted her cheerfully.

Tsubaki ignored him, instead grabbing Kota's head and forcing him to look up at her. "I hope you did not forget about our lesson."

"No, of course not!" Kota chuckled, the anxiety obvious in his voice.

"Hmm." She replied simply, digging her fingers into his head until he squawked.

"All right, all right!" Kota yelled. "I did forget!"

"Just as I thought." Tsubaki replied curtly. She removed her death grip on Kota's head. "Now come along, rookie. Unless you want another remedial lesson."

"No!" Kota cried, jumping to his feet. He waved at us before running out of the mess hall.

"What a fun rookie." Lindow remarked, a sly grin on his lips.

Tsubaki just rolled her eyes, turning smartly on her heel and following Kota's exit.

"Well, I guess we should get going on our mission." Lindow said, standing up. He walked away, heading over to where Soma was sitting. I watched their discussion, noticing what seemed to be a lot of angry retorts on Soma's part.

"Song, are you okay?" Sakuya asked.

I turned, looking at her confusedly.

Sakuya shrugged. "You just looked a little sad, that's all."

I smiled. -I'm fine.-

Sakuya smiled back. "All right."

"Let's go!" Lindow said, coming to stand beside us, Soma glaring dejectedly at him from his position behind him.

So we headed off to our mission.

x

"I can handle this alone, you know." Soma muttered.

"Yeah, yeah." Lindow replied, waving his hand dismissively. "I'm sure we all can. But it's only 3 Zygotes, so if we work together we can finish this mission real quick."

"Whatever." Soma growled. He walked forward, ready to leap off the edge and into the Tranquil Temple.

"Hold it right there!" Lindow yelled, grabbing Soma's shoulder and forcibly turning him around. "No soloing on this mission! We'll split into two groups. You and Song are going to head out together."

I saw Soma grit his teeth, glaring at Lindow. All I could think of was _Why, Lindow, why?!_

"Well, come along, rookie." Soma growled, turning around once again.

Lindow grinned at me, ruffling my hair as I walked by. I stared at him, until Soma grabbed my arm dragged me off the ledge.

"I don't know about you, but I want to get this over with as soon as possible." Soma said, letting go of my arm so he could properly grasp his God Arc. "So don't lag behind, and don't drag me down."

I nodded, which seemed to surprise him. I guess most people wouldn't agree with something so obviously insulting.

"Well, let's go." Soma muttered, running off towards the west.

I followed him.

We encountered the first Zygote on the stairs. With powerful strikes, we quickly took it down. I barely had time to devour from it before Soma left, leaving me to run as fast as I could behind him.

So that was why I was still running when Soma stuck an arm out, nearly clotheslining me. I caught my breath as he gazed intensely from around the corner.

"Switch to Gun Form." He whispered.

Suddenly the Zygote whirled around, flying towards us. It must have heard us.

I quickly transformed into Gun Form, firing off as many bolt::mortar shots as I could. Once my OP bar was empty, I switched to Blade Form and finished the Zygote off.

Soma went and sat on a ledge as I devoured from the Zygote. I wondered why he was so relaxed until I saw Lindow and Sakuya running towards us.

"I guess learning sign language would be useful." I heard Soma mutter.

I jumped. Had he just said what I thought he said?

"It would be helpful if you taught me." Soma continued. When I looked at him, he was staring at me with unreadable eyes. "In case something like that happens again, except with a stronger Aragami."

I nodded, trying desperately to hide my nervousness. It was great that he wanted to learn sign language, but how would I teach him? Sit with him at meals? Or private tutoring sessions? I was too nervous to decide.

"That's a great idea!" Lindow said suddenly, making me jump. I didn't even realize he'd arrived, let alone heard anything. "I guess you'll just have to sit with us whenever we eat."

Soma glared at Lindow, as if angry that he'd overheard. How weird…

"You know, Soma." Lindow waved a finger at him. "You're going to be really behind, so you're gonna have to work hard to learn, understand?"

"You shouldn't really talk." Sakuya giggled as she said this. "You're not doing too well either."

"We can't all be geniuses." Lindow shrugged, a smile on his lips. "But anyway, we should get going. This place is damn cold."

x

"Fight."

I balled my hands into fists, crossing my arms in a violent motion.

"Wait."

I titled both arms to the side, hands open as I wiggled my fingers.

"Run."

I made an L shape with both hands, my right index finger resting on my left thumb. I flexed the index fingers, both hands moving to the side.

"Geez, Soma." Lindow said, shaking his head. "I thought she was supposed to be teaching _you_. But you're drilling her like a sergeant!"

Soma frowned, but ignored him. "Search."

I formed my hand into a C, drawing two circles in front of my face.

"We need new signs. These use two hands. It won't work if we have our God Arcs." Soma muttered.

"I'm sure we can figure out what you mean if you start punching at the air." Kota retorted sourly. He'd been acting like that ever since Soma started sitting with us. Maybe it was because Sakuya had made Soma sit between her and Kota.

Soma glared at Kota, thought Kota just stuck out his tongue at him.

"Well, anyway." Lindow said, standing up. "You probably should get going on your mission. This is the first 4-person mission these members have performed. Just do as you always do."

Kota looked at him quizzically. "Huh? Wait, what about you, Lindow?"

"Well, you see, I've been asked on a secret date right after this." Lindow said as he shrugged. "So it's just gonna be the four of you today."

I saw Kota make a face at this, looking at Soma from the corner of his eye.

Lindow just chuckled, pulling a phone out from his pocket. He looked at it for a second, then returned it to its place. "If I don't get there in time, my date will get mad and leave. Talk about impatient! I'm taking off now, guys. My orders are the usual: don't die. Make sure you come back alive."

Soma glared down at the table. "They're your own orders. Better make sure you follow them yourself!"

"Try not to stay out too late, Lindow, okay?" Sakuya added gently.

-Have fun.- I signed, feeling my response was pathetic compared to the others'.

"Have bad?" Lindow asked, confused.

"Have fun." Sakuya chided.

"Oh, well, whatever." Lindow said with a grin. "'Have fun' to you too!"


	8. VIII

VIII

**Song**

"We'll split up and search for the enemies separately. We have to take out 3 Zygotes and a Kongou." Sakuya ordered. "If you find a Zygote, take it down. If you find the Kongou, it might be better to try and find someone else to help."

"All right!" Kota said eagerly, his eagerness evident.

"Got that, Song and Soma?" Sakuya asked, turning to us. I nodded while Soma grunted.

"Okay." Sakuya said. "Be careful!"

With that said, we headed into the City of Mercy.

x

It didn't take long before I found an enemy. And, of course, it was the Kongou.

I stared at its monkey face as it leapt from a hole in a building. Before it had made it down the ledges that separated us, I had my God Arc in Gun Form and was firing shots at it.

I was tempted to run, but something stopped me. I knew thanks to my armlet that everyone else was dealing with an enemy, probably the three Zygotes. Surely I could handle a Kongou by myself! Kota and I had taken one down before, so I just needed to be careful and then I could bring the monkey down.

It charged at me, and I quickly switched to Blade Form. I went right at it, striking its face with quick blows that left me ample time to dodge.

It was a battle of speed and will. Could I keep up with it? Could I block its attack in time? Could I shoot it? They were all questions that were answered in the space of seconds. Eventually my brain went numb, my body moving on its own. I did not even realize I had used my shield until I felt the Kongou's rolling body slam into it, stopping me from getting flattened. It was like an intricate dance; one wrong move and your partner crashed into you. Except, in this case, one wrong move on my part ended with a powerful blow from an overgrown monkey.

My body sang as I Unbounded the Kongou's face. That feeling that I couldn't grasp was returning yet again. I wondered if this was the Aragami inside of me. It did crave the violence and pain I was inflicting. My God Arc did not feel like a weapon; it felt like a part of me, an extra, dangerous limb. My movements were coordinated and served a pattern I did not know, as if I were simply a puppet being pulled along by strings. Still, I was enjoying the life of a puppet.

Or, at least I was, until some string snapped. I made a wrong move.

The Kongou took the chance to strike, barrelling towards me in its familiar ball form.

I gritted my teeth as it struck. That had been my mistake. I tried to dodge, but I'd underestimated the range of the Kongou's attack.

The blow sent me flying into the narrow alley-way in front of the starting position. I hit into something that most definitely was not a wall, thank goodness. That would have been much more painful than whatever it was that I slammed into.

The Kongou roared, as if laughing at me. I sat up, rubbing at my dizzy head. I was lucky. In my flight I had managed to avoid the steel posts that jutted from the ground of the alley. Hitting into one of those would have probably killed me, heightened Gods Eater powers or not.

"Song!" I looked up to see Sakuya, her face concerned. "Are you all right? But first, maybe you should—"

"Rookie." A familiar voice growled, though it sounded like it was in pain. "Get off me."

Confused, I glanced down. Instantly my face burned and I jumped to my feet, severely frazzled and dizzy.

I had landed on _Soma_.

_Soma_, of all people!

I started gesturing wildly, apologizing over and over again. My face was still burning and my brain was hazy. How embarrassing! Couldn't it have been anyone but Soma? Sakuya would have been perfectly fine! But not Soma! At the moment, hitting a metal post would have been more desirable than this.

I heard Sakuya giggle, probably finding it amusing now that she knew I was okay.

Soma frowned at me, picking up his God Arc that must have been knocked to the ground beside him. "I don't understand what you're saying."

_Of course he doesn't!_ His words put me into an even greater panic. _Oh god! How am I supposed to apologize if he can't even understand me?!_

Sakuya was too busy laughing to help.

Soma struggled to his feet, snapping me out of my panic. I grabbed his arm and helped pull him up. The moment he was on his feet he snapped his arm out of my grasp, which was beginning to become a familiar gesture. The movement made me sway a little. I was dizzy, not to mention that my head was pounding.

"I see you've found the Kongou, rookie." Soma growled, looking past me.

I jumped, looking behind me. The Kongou was charging straight towards us.

I nearly punched myself in the head. No amount of embarrassment should have made me forget about the Aragami.

"We're going to have trouble fighting it in this small place." Sakuya said, all traces of mirth gone from her voice. "Run!"

Sakuya was running off, along with Soma. I just stood there, dazed. My head hurt from hitting into Soma, despite the soft landing. Plus, I was exhausted from fighting the Kongou on my own.

Suddenly Soma turned around, running towards me and grabbing my arm. He dragged me behind him as he ran from the Kongou. I was having trouble keeping up, let alone stopping myself from stumbling. Soma must have sensed my trouble; he turned around again and wrapped a steadying arm around my waist, though he still kept his running pace.

Soma pulled me until the end of the alley, and we found ourselves in a wide open space. In the middle of it was two platforms, one raised higher than the other. Sakuya was standing there, waiting for us as she poised her gun towards the Kongou.

Sakuya looked at us, bemused. I was still too dazed, so when Soma jerked his arm away I swayed a little. That made Sakuya frown.

"Song, you should probably hang back. I don't know what you did, but obviously you're too exhausted to be of much help. Fire off bullets if you can."

I blinked, nodding. She was right, of course, which wasn't too surprising for a medic.

"It shouldn't take too long to beat it. It already looks like you did a lot of damage to it." Soma said right before he jumped to attack the Kongou.

Was that…a compliment, or as close as you could get with Soma?

But never mind. For the moment, there were more important things to be done.

Soma was right. We easily finished off the Kongou in no time. However, by the time the gorilla finally collapsed, I was panting and needed to sit down to catch my breath, even though I didn't even move much.

"You're obviously in no condition to move." Sakuya murmured. "You probably have a concussion. Soma, you stay here with her while I go find Kota."

"Shouldn't the medic stay with the injured person?" Soma did not sound pleased with her proposition.

"There shouldn't be any danger so long as you don't move her. Plus, if it's taking Kota so long he might need a medic. And"—Sakuya winked—"I'm technically the leader on this mission, so you should listen to me."

"All right." Soma growled.

I barely understood what was going on until Sakuya gently led me to the raised platforms, sitting me down on one.

"I'll be back," she said right before she ran off.

Soma came and sat on the platform beside me, keeping a good distance between us. Even in my foggy state I could sense his anger.

But there was no time to make peace. Even though I was sitting down, I still felt dazed. It felt like the world was tilting. And, I was—

"Tired." I murmured.

Soma shot up like an electric shock went up his body. "Did you—"

The shock was evident in his voice, but there were more pressing issues at hand. My eyelids were dropping, and I was not willing to stop them.

I felt a hand roughly grip my shoulder before I fell unconscious.


	9. IX

IX

**Soma**

"What do you mean she just passed out?!" Kota screamed at me, obviously panicked.

"Exactly what it sounds like." I spat out.

"That's weird." Sakuya frowned. "Usually a person who falls unconscious because of a concussion will do that right after they get hit. She just seemed dizzy. Was she acting weird, Soma?"

I didn't know how to answer that.

If I told her that Song had said "tired", she would think I was lying. A mute doesn't speak. And Song surely was a mute. But I was sure that I'd heard her.

"Soma?" Sakuya obviously caught on to my silence. "What happened? It's really important that you tell me."

I looked to where Song was unconscious, slumped against the second raised platform that acted like a backrest.

"She said that she was tired." I finally told her.

Sakuya looked at me. "I don't remember her teaching you that sign."

"She actually spoke it. Out loud."

Kota burst out laughing at this. "Song's mute! Are you telling me you she spoke to _you_?!"

I glared at him. "I heard her."

Kota just kept laughing, but Sakuya looked pensive. "You are absolutely sure of this?"

"Yes." I growled.

"All right." Sakuya actually looked relieved. "Then it isn't as serious as I thought. She just went to sleep."

_To sleep? _I wondered, staring at Song. Not that I thought about it, she hadn't exactly passed out. She had leaned back and closed her eyes. I guess that just because I knew that people could fall unconscious because of concussions, I'd just assumed that had been what happened.

"Wait, so you think she actually _spoke_?" Kota asked, looking incredulously at Sakuya. "But…"

"She might not be physically unable to speak." Sakuya said, a small frown on her face. "Some people go mute because of a traumatic event in their lives. It's actually pretty common, nowadays."

I glanced at Song. She had faced a Kongou on her own. It was hard to imagine something terrible enough to make her go mute.

"We can wake her up." Sakuya said, walking over to Song so she was standing in front of her.

Sakuya lightly slapped Song's face, probably deciding that shaking her shoulder could hurt her head. Song opened her eyes tiredly, groaning as she sat up, rubbing at her eyes.

Song was suddenly very awake, sitting forward quickly.

"Careful!" Sakuya admonished, grabbing Song's shoulders to prevent her from falling forward.

Song smiled sheepishly. The sudden outburst had done nothing to stop her tiredness. She looked like she was struggling to keep her eyes open.

Sakuya knelt in front of Song, gently saying, "What's your name?"

Song looked at her in confusion before extending her left arm, her right hand waving over it like a conductor's baton.

"Good, good." Sakuya said, so I assumed that that was the sign for song. "Where are you?"

Once again Song signed an answer, which seemed to satisfy Sakuya, although Song just looked confused. I was slightly disappointed that Song hadn't spoken. Kota seemed to be shooting me a distrustful look.

"Hey, rookie." I said, interrupting Sakuya's question. Song had already answered a couple of them correctly, so she must be fine. "Do you remember talking to me?"

Song stared at me, as if processing what I'd said. Then her face went red. But her reaction was…strange. Instead of seeming surprised, or even happy, she looked horrified.

She clasped her head between her hands, shaking it. She was panting like before, except she hadn't done anything physically strenuous.

But the worst part was that she looked at me, horror and regret in her eyes. What was the big deal about talking to me, anyway?

"Song, are you okay?" Sakuya asked, looking at her worriedly.

Song looked up, obviously shaken. But she forced a smile, nodding slightly.

Sakuya obviously didn't believe her, but she let it go.

I was still mulling over Song's reaction. What was so terrifying about her speaking? I just didn't understand.

"Well, we should get back to base." Sakuya said, looking at Song from the corner of her eye. "Song, can you stand?"

Song nodded, getting to her feet. Obviously her panic had somewhat invigorated her, because she didn't so much as sway.

"All right, let's go!" Kota said cheerfully, despite the gloomy atmosphere.

x

"So basically she had a freak out." Lindow said.

Sakuya nodded.

"And you think it was caused by her _speaking_?"

Sakuya nodded again.

Lindow let out a big sigh, sinking farther into the couch. "You're sure of this, Soma?"

"Yes." I answered for the umpteenth time. Somehow it was always me that was put in doubt, even though Song's reaction to hearing that she'd spoken was obvious proof that I was telling the truth.

"Well, there's probably a story behind that." Lindow murmured. "Everyone seems to have a terrible past nowadays."

"So she's a mute because she's afraid of her voice." Sakuya mused.

"Or afraid of what her voice _does_." I added.

Sakuya looked at me in shock, realisation dawning in her eyes. Then she turned to Lindow. "Do you know anything about her past? Anything at all?"

"Nope." Lindow simply replied.

Sakuya looked troubled. "I have a theory, but I need to know about her past."

"Why?" Lindow asked, obviously curious.

"She's obviously not physically mute, but she went mute for a reason…"

"So you think it has something to do with her past."

"Exactly!" Sakuya exclaimed, clapping her hands together. "But I need to figure out _what_."

X

**Song**

The weird looks everyone was giving me was making my nervous.

I tried eating my peas and pretending that I didn't notice, but it was difficult. The only one who wasn't staring at me was Soma.

Soma.

I gritted my teeth. No, maybe it wouldn't happen this time. Maybe that was just a fluke. No, that was wrong. There was no way it was a fluke.

"Something bothering you?" Lindow asked.

I mentally cursed. Everyone was on too high alert for my tension to go unnoticed. I shook my head, adding a look of 'why would you think that?' for good measure.

"Oh, all right then." Lindow said in that easy-going manner of his.

Awkward silence descended again.

I chased a particularly agile pea across my plate. Every time it narrowly avoided death by fork. Every. Single. Time.

I felt a hand close over mine. I looked up, realizing that Sakuya was the one stopping me from stabbing any longer.

"Geez, I didn't think the plates deserve such abuse." Lindow said with a laugh.

I felt my face go red as I let go of the fork, sinking farther into my chair. If there had been any doubt that there was something wrong with me, it was completely decimated now.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." Sakuya said, gently placing the fork onto my plate. "But you have to understand that we're worried about you."

The talks always started that way. We're worried. Let us help you.

But they couldn't possibly understand. I'd told the first couple about what happened, about what forced me to go mute. But no one could wrap their head around it. No one understood why. They always gave me the same look, the same look of disbelief.

"Let us help you." Sakuya said sweetly.

That was when I got up and ran.


	10. X

X

**Song**

"Song! Song, please answer!"

I sighed, covering my eyes with an arm. This was the third time that Sakuya had tried to get me to open the door. Kota had tried 4 times. Lindow had tried once, then left as he said "I guess I'll respect your privacy.". At least _he_ was understanding.

I ignored her pleas, until eventually wonderful silence returned.

My little act at the mess hall had been pretty pathetic, I had to admit. I could have dealt with the situation a lot better…but I had just felt so sick to my stomach at that moment.

I sighed, bringing the pillow off my bed over my face. There really was nothing for me to do other than just lie down and hope I fell asleep eventually.

There was another knock on the door, though this one wasn't nearly as frantic as any of the others'. I just sat on the bed, ignoring it. After a while, I assumed whoever it was had left.

So that was why I was so startled when Soma said, "I hope you realize that hiding whatever this is could end up killing us all."

I jolted upright. What was he talking about? Kill everyone? No, he was lying, for sure.

"If you freak out like today, then you could miss a critical moment in battle." Soma stated matter-of-factly. "Then someone could die."

I felt sick to my stomach. Stupid Soma. He was just trying to guilt me into complying. I turned over violently, facing the wall instead of the door.

Suddenly I heard the door open. I turned back in shock, seeing Soma stand in the doorway, a little smirk on his lips.

"It would be helpful if you locked the door." Soma said, closing the door as he stepped into the room.

I pointed at him, then at the door. He glared at me. "I'm not leaving."

_Well fine then._ I thought viciously. _Then I'll just ignore you._

Soma came and sat on the wood partition between the bed and the rest of the room, but only after serving himself to a beer from my fridge.

Although this was obviously done to annoy me, I ignored it. I glared at him as I sat on my bed, pillow resting on my crossed legs and clutched to my chest.

Soma took a long drink from the beer then seemed to think about something. He stood up, reaching to the ledge behind me. I drew back, mostly because he was too close for comfort.

When he finished doing whatever he was doing, he threw my notepad and a pencil beside me on the bed. He sat down on the partition again, taking another sip of beer.

Once again, I pointed at him, then at the door.

"I already told you, I'm not leaving." He scowled.

I did the motion again.

He didn't answer this time, just giving me a look of 'you're wasting your time'. Eventually I agreed, stopping myself mind-action.

The stare-down returned, with neither side wavering in its determination to win.

Except it seemed that natural causes were going to bring me down. I was tired. My dropping eyelids ruined the stare off.

Soma had finished his beer a long time ago, the empty can clenched between his hands. I couldn't tell if he noticed my tiredness of not. He certainly wasn't making any move to leave.

After what seemed like another ten minutes and a lot of trying to stay alert on my part, Soma said, "This isn't over." And left.

I breathed a sigh of relief the moment the door closed. Then I forced my tired body into standing up and making sure the door was locked.

x

Apparently with my state of mind in limbo, I wasn't allowed on any missions.

I cursed to myself. It definitely wasn't a matter of higher-up doing; if it had been, then I would have professional psychologists knocking on my door. No, I figured that it was Lindow who had done this.

Soma's words replayed in my head.

_If you freak out like today, then you could miss a critical moment in battle. Then someone could die._

_Ugh._ I slammed the pillow over my face. I couldn't hide in my room all day. I'd starve. But I didn't want to face anyone. I hated how pathetic I was being, but I found that I couldn't stop.

A knock on the door brought my attention to the real life. Who was it this time?

"Open up."

Soma.

I wondered how long it would take for him to go away. I wondered if I would last that long. Surely he had a mission to go to. You know, without me.

I rolled face down on my bed, hiding my head under the pillow. The poor, poor battered pillow that was getting its fair use lately.

"Look, I'm not after a heart to heart talk." Soma growled. "I just want to know if you'll go on a mission with me."

_A…mission?_ I sat up, grabbing my notepad and quickly jotting down:

Lindow banned me from going on any.

Before ripping out the page and slipping it under the door.

"I'll take my chances." Was Soma's answer.

X

And that was how I ended up at the Wailing Plains, being hammered by rain and missing the warmth of my bed.

I looked at Soma expectantly. We were standing on the starting platform, but he wasn't giving any commands.

"Ready, New-Type?" He asked and I nodded. With that, we jumped from the platform.

_Okay…I guess I'll just follow him for now…_

I had a vague understanding of the mission. We were supposed to take down a Gboro-Gboro. I wondered if just the two of us would be enough. But I guess I would just have to trust Soma.

Soma suddenly grabbed my arm, stopping me. Farther down the round track was the Gboro-Gboro.

"Time to prove that you're okay, rookie." Soma said before jumping into action.

I followed him, watching as the Gboro-Gboro caught sight of us and roared. Undaunted, we charged into battle.

It didn't go nearly as fast as I could. While I would usually charge and slash as much as my heart desired, I stopped myself from falling into that crazy rage. I needed to keep an eye on Soma. I needed to know that he was safe.

So that was why when Soma suddenly collapsed from a nasty attack, I was at his side in a second.

I shook his shoulder violently, but he didn't stir.

_Crap crap crap! No, don't panic!_ I thought desperately, but I could still feel my heart pounding.

He couldn't be dead! He just couldn't! I knew it, I knew that the moment I spoke to him this would happen! Why?! Why did I do that?! I could never have spoken even if I had ever wanted to, but somehow I had spoken without even realizing it!

The Gboro-Gboro roared, bringing my attention back to it. I had two choices, that much my panicked mind assured me. I could grab Soma and run, or try and fight the giant fish while keeping it distracted from the unconscious Gods Eater.

But what if Soma was more seriously injured than I thought? What if he was…dead?

_No, stop thinking that way! _But no matter how much the rational part of brain said that, the rest of it would have nothing of it.

The Gboro-Gboro waddled forward, and my body reacted on its own. I switched to Gun Form, firing a couple shots that knocked the Gboro-Gboro back a couple steps. One more shot knocked it to the ground.

I grabbed Soma, slinging one arm over my shoulder so that he was resting against my back. The hand grasping his God Arc hung loosely at my side, and I was thankful that he was holding on to it. Then I made a run for it.

The combined panic and the weight brought exhaustion upon me in seconds. I was panting in half-a-minute but kept moving. In two minutes my throat was raw.

Eventually I reached the area across from the starting platform. I gently put Soma down, leaning him against the remains of a building.

But the gentle act gave way to my panic. Still panting from the running didn't help the matter either.

_Please don't tell me he's dead, please…_

I tried shaking his shoulders some more, but he didn't react. I felt my eyes tear up. No, not another one…

I couldn't yell at him. My voice is what caused this in the first place, and it most definitely was not going to rescue me from this situation. All I could do was continue to shake his shoulders.

_No! _My violence was doing nothing. I slammed my head to his chest, shaking uncontrollably.

"Ow."

I jumped back, watching as Soma opened his eyes with a wince.

Before he could react, I had enveloped him in a hug.

"Rookie." He growled, pushing me off him. "Too close."

I picked myself off the ground, too relieved that he was alive to care that my hoodie had gotten all dirty from landing in the mud.

Soma stared at me. "Are you…crying?"

I put a hand to my face, realizing that my cheeks were wet. Of course I had been crying! I thought that he was dead!

I almost started crying when I realized once again that he was actually alive.

"What the hell's wrong, rookie?"

In response, I grabbed my notepad and hastily wrote:

I thought you were dead.

"So you panicked." Soma growled. "Let me guess. You didn't even check if I was alive."

Now it was my turn to stare. Why…why didn't I realize that?! I could have easily listened for his heartbeat…and I'd even felt his breath on my neck when I was running from the Gboro-Gboro!

Soma frowned at my lack of answer. He seemed to be thinking hard about something. "You just assumed that I was dead. Is there a reason for that, rookie?"

I blinked. He'd…he'd caught on, just from my panic?

"Song…" I blinked again. Soma had just used my real name. "Answer me. What made you assume that I was dead?"

I shifted nervously. I knew what was going to happen know. It would be just like last night. We'd stare at each other until one of us left, or one of us gave in.

But…I reached for the notepad. I was a Gods Eater now. People like Mrs. Oguri and Aiko were relying on me. If I couldn't even solve my own problems, how could I help others?

Soma watched patiently as I wrote on my notepad. I flipped the page so he could see.

My voice kills people.


	11. XI

XI

**Soma**

I stared at her. "Your voice kills people." I stated incredulously.

Song nodded, as if it made the most sense in the world.

"You can't be serious."

She tilted her head to the side, as if she didn't understand my confusion. She probably didn't.

"Why—"

A roar interrupted my question, and I jumped to my feet. I tried to hide the wince resulting from the pain of previous wounds.

Song got to her feet too, God Arc in hand. I looked around, seeing my own God Arc on the ground beside me.

_So she managed to drag me and the God Arc to safety…_ I thought. _That takes dedication._

"Is the Gboro-Gboro still out there?" I asked. She nodded.

I gritted my teeth. I'd taken a few hits from the Gboro-Gboro, but nothing as bad as that last one. It would be a lot harder to fight it in this state…

Song stared at me. Then, she turned around and ran.

"Where the hell are you going?!" I yelled, chasing after her. She was a lot faster than me. I watched her round a corner, a roar answering. By the time I caught up she was already fighting the Gboro-Gboro.

_Idiot._ I thought, watching as she used her shield to avoid the Gboro-Gboro's thrashing around.

For some stupid reason, the rookie had been keeping an eye on me the whole time we'd been fighting. But I guess it all made sense now that she thought I was going to die. Still, it annoyed me. What was a stupid _rookie_ doing, worrying for me? If anything, I should be watching out for _her_.

But never mind. While I was standing there thinking of that, Song had already done quite a bit of damage to the Gboro. I leapt into battle.

x

"So you say your voice kills people." Sakuya said gently.

Song shrunk farther back into the couch, looking as if she wished she could disappear into the worn red leather.

We were all scattered around Song's room. Lindow and Sakuya were sitting right beside Song, with Lindow's arm slung on the back of the couch behind Song. Kota was next to Sakuya, while I was leaning against the counter across from the couch.

"I think I understand where you're coming from." Sakuya continued. "Many of us have terrible events in our lives that affect us deeply. Is that why you won't talk?"

Song glanced quickly at her, though she kept her gaze fixed on her knees drawn right in front of her.

"Does this have to do with your parents, Song?" Kota asked.

She looked at him and nodded.

"Would you mind if Kota told us about that?" Sakuya questioned.

Song didn't answer. After a second, she returned her feet to the floor and reached to the table in front of her. She grabbed her notepad and pencil, returned to her original position, and started to write.

I nearly dozed off as she wrote. It didn't help that she took so long, but I was a little tired from the mission. Falling unconscious did that to people.

Lindow took a sip from his beer while we waited. He had served himself, much like I had done yesterday. For once he seemed to be taking this seriously. He hadn't uttered a word ever since he sat down.

After Song and I finished our mission, we returned in silence. Lindow had been waiting for us. He'd been the one who put me up to this. I would have never went on a mission alone with the rookie, but he'd ordered me to. The thought made my blood boil. Lindow, that son of a bitch. Song seemed to be oblivious to what he was doing, but I wasn't nearly so blind. It was like he was _trying_ to get her to trust me. All the missions that I'd been ordered to go along with, not to mention the times when he'd split us into groups and made Song follow me. Plus, forcing me to learn sign language… It was all lining up to become a ruse to bring us closer together. I had no idea why the hell he was matching her up with me. Kota clearly understood her, and they obviously got along. So why the hell did he throw her at me? As if I needed a stupid rookie getting all attached!

The rage building up almost made me miss Song returning the pencil to the table. She glanced uncertainly at her notepad. It seemed like her gaze would burn a hole in the paper.

"If it bothers you so much, don't show us." I growled, fed up with her hesitation.

Song flinched, then handed the notepad to Sakuya.

"Read it out loud." Lindow said, the first words he'd spoken for a while now. His voice was deadly serious for once.

Sakuya looked at the paper again before starting to read.

"When I was 7, I was living in the Outer Ghetto with my parents. Back then, I was actually quite chatty."

_It's not like she doesn't talk too much right now. _I thought.

"One day, I was running around outside like usual. Then I saw an Aragami that I never saw before. It was silver, with four legs and what looked like shields on its arms. It had a big tail with some kind of needle at the end."

_Borg Camlann._

"I ran and hid from the Aragami. I heard it stomp by and breathed a sigh of relief when it passed. I was lucky that I was in an area that was pretty abandoned. The Borg Camlann kept walking, and I saw my parents. They were looking for me, as always. I yelled to them." Sakuya took a breath. Whatever was coming next obviously wasn't very cheery. "Suddenly the Borg Camlann was there again. It must have heard my voice. It killed my parents."

I glanced at Song. She was twiddling her thumbs, biting her bottom lip. So that was why she was afraid of speaking.

Sakuya surprised me by continuing. "After that, I barely spoke. Mister and missus Oguri adopted me. They were close friends with my parents. Five years passed. The Oguris were very patient with me. Mrs. Oguri even taught me how to speak sign language. Before the Aragami appeared, she had taught a class dealing with disabled children, and that is where she learned it. That was how I learned sign language. It was a lot more comforting for me to speak that way than out loud.

"Mr. and Mrs. Oguri were going to have a child. I was 11 at the time. This time, I wasn't outside when the Aragami found me. It was at night. I heard a noise, and went to find someone to tell. Mr. Oguri was the only one still awake, so I told him about it. He dismissed it and told me to return to bed. He didn't even seem surprised that I'd spoken to him out loud, because at that point I almost never did that.

"Just moments after I left the living room, an explosive destroyed it. Mr. Oguri was still inside. After that, I never spoke again."


	12. XII

XII

**Song**

The Cocoon Maidens surged from the earth, surrounding our little group.

"The Ogretails should be nearby!" Lindow yelled. "If you see one, concentrate your attacks on it!"

My blade bit into the Cocoon Maiden, a splash of red confirming the hit. I kept striking at it, forced to control my movements against such a narrow target. The other two Cocoon Maidens were under a joint bombardment from Sakuya and Kota, while Lindow aided me against my current enemy.

As I fought, my mind wandered off back to where it had been last night…at a group intervention between the First Unit and I.

When Sakuya had finished reading, silence had descended. I could barely stand the stares pointed my way.

"I think I understand what you went through." Sakuya had told me. "But Song…a simple voice doesn't kill people. You can't blame yourself for any of their deaths."

I had tightened my grip on my pants at that point. I'd heard that all my life. It's not your fault they're dead. Voices don't kill people. You just happened to be there at the wrong time. But those were the words of strangers. Strangers lie to people all the time. Sure, I'd grown closer to Sakuya. I considered her a friend. But there was no possible way she could know me so well. There was no way she could understand. I could only trust myself, because only I knew the truth.

"Well, I think that's it for the night." Lindow had suddenly said, rising from the couch and stretching. "Thanks for the beer! Good night!"

Sakuya had been about to protest, but I hadn't missed the meaningful glance Lindow had shot at her.

And, just like that, they'd left, leaving me with more questions then I cared for.

The questions were still rattling in my brain as I finished off the Cocoon Maiden. I saw a flash of white from the corner of my eye; it was the Ogretails arriving. I didn't even stop to devour from the fallen Cocoon Maiden—me, the notorious resource hoarder—as I leapt towards the Ogretail, slashing it over and over. I was afraid that if I didn't stop fighting—if I didn't stop moving—I would have to face those questions. I wasn't ready for that yet.

So I guess I was going to have to keep moving forward.

X

**Soma**

I crept through the Old City, hand on my Buster Blade and eyes looking all around.

As I reached the end of the platform—the place where Song had spoken and given us all a scare—I saw a white figure race into the chapel.

"Someone there?" I asked. The City answered in its silence.

I followed the figure into the chapel, taut with tension. When I reached the chapel itself, the room filled with pink light and colorful windows, I looked around.

"I imagined it." I said with a sigh. There was nothing to be seen in the chapel.

_I guess I better report._

I picked up my beeping phone. "This is Soma… So far no contact with the target… We'll continue to investigate."

With that, I left.

X

**Song**

"Hey, New-Type, have you ever felt someone's presence around the old office ruins?"

I looked up, startled. It was Soma. I hadn't even heard him coming.

"Well?" He asked again, frowning.

_Oh god, what was the question again? _I struggled to remember. His sudden appearance had startled me so much I'd forgotten what he'd asked.

"I haven't sensed anything." Kota grumbled. With that, I remembered the question. We'd been sitting on the couch in the Den, chatting—well, Kota did the most of that—and enjoying a drink.

"I didn't expect you to." Soma growled. "I wasn't asking you. So rookie number 2, got an answer for me yet?"

I shook my head no.

"No answer?"

I flinched. I shook my head more vigorously. Wait, does that mean that I really don't have an answer? I was trying to say that I saw nothing!

"I think she means that she hasn't felt anything." Kota muttered sourly. I guess Soma's earlier comment had gotten to him. But, then again, Kota and Soma were always putting each other on edge.

"I see… All right, forget I asked. Sorry to bother you."

"Wow!" Kota said the moment Soma had gone. "Can you believe it, Song? He was actually nice to you!"

I shrugged. Soma had said his last remark in the same tone he always had—grouchy and frank.

"It's kinda weird, you know." Kota gave me a curious look. "You're always together. How can you stand him? I can't even be with him for a minute without losing it!"

-What do you mean we're always together?-

"Don't play innocent!" Kota gasped, jabbing a finger at me. "Lately you've been doing a lot of missions with him! And I saw him go into your room when you ran off at that one supper!" He narrowed his eyes, a mischievous grin on his face. "So what exactly have you two been doing?"

What was with that grin of his? I felt like I was missing something. -I don't understand.-

"You don't have to hide it from me!" Kota said, leaning back with his arms crossed behind his head. He seemed very smug and self-satisfied. Weird. "Us Ghetto kids have to stick together! I don't really like Soma, but I like you, Song! So I respect your decisions in choice of partners!"

-Partners?-

"Yeah, you know…" Kota smiled very strangely then. "As in—"

"Song!" It was Hibari, the receptionist. "Lindow would like to see you."

"Later!" Kota fluttered his hand dismissively. "C'mon, Song! Spit it out! What exactly have you two been doing?"

Somehow the way he said that gave me the shivers. -I really don't know what you're talking about. Sorry, but I have to go see Lindow. Bye!-

I stood up, smiling at Hibari. As I opened the elevator doors, I heard Kota cry, "Wait! You need to tell me!"

X

"Hey…" Lindow seemed a bit more down than usual. "I have a favour to ask you…"

A feeling of dread crawled over me. Lindow didn't seem as upbeat as he usually was. What had happened?

"A new Gods Eater will be assigned to this branch soon. Probably another New-Type God Arc user." That wasn't that bad of news. Why was Lindow acting so weird? He continued: "I can't prove it, but our director seems to be gathering New-Type Gods Eaters to the Far East Branch. Which brings me to my request. If he ever says anything about that to you, could you let me know?"

I stared. Knowing that Lindow probably wouldn't understand me, I took out my notepad.

You want me to spy for you?

"It's not really spying!" He saw my look. "...Sure, I could ask him myself, but I just find it hard to talk to that guy."

I stared again. Oh, I get it! The reason he seemed so glum was because he is scared of the director! That makes sense. Don't worry Lindow, your secret's safe with me!

I nodded vigorously, a smile on my face. Lindow looked surprised, but soon he smiled. "Only if you feel like it. If it's confidential, you don't need to reveal it, but I'll give you a reward for that."

I nodded again. Lindow seemed relieved. "Thanks, Song. You're a real lifesaver."

I smiled. Taking that as my dismissal, I left the room.

X

Before I left for my next mission, I crafted some new bullets. In the Terminal, I found a helpful bullet creator named CrimsonAvatar. The bullet recipe went by the name of Blaze Missiles. I crafted one, and, happy with the results, I made copies with each a different element.

And, with that, I was ready for my next mission.


	13. XIII

XIII

**Song**

Well, I suppose what Kota said was the truth. About Soma and I always being together. But this time, it wasn't either of our faults. Kota and Sakuya were just avoiding us.

"Idiots." Soma grumbled under his breath.

We were on the hunt for a Chi-You. I'd never seen one before, but Hibari had assured me that it was a pesky Aragami. According to the mission details they were weak to Freeze, so I took my element-less Knife II instead of the stronger Heat Drill. I also equipped my "Freeze Missiles", the Freeze variant of CrimsonAvatar's Blaze Missiles.

Of course that wouldn't really matter if we never actually found the Chi-You, not to mention if we never actually found Sakuya and Kota again.

But they had been acting weird. Before we had leapt off the starting platform and into the Infernal Subway, Kota and Sakuya had been whispering to each other, glancing at Soma and I. But when Soma confronted them, they answered "nothing!" and went right back to whispering when he turned his back.

_Is this because of them?_ I frowned. _No, why would they do this? Don't they know it's dangerous?_

I'd given off a couple of signals to them before to "Gather round", but they had ignored the calls. Whenever Soma and I headed to their location—shown by the armlets—they made sure to avoid us. I knew that I wasn't the leader, but this was ridiculous! They were acting like kids!A

As I went to send another signal, Soma stopped me.

"Don't bother. They're doing this on purpose. Let's go find the Chi-You. If we do, they're sure to come running if you send a signal."

I nodded. That made sense. The armlets allowed us to communicate Aragami's locations, so if they saw that there was an Aragami nearby and we sent out a signal, then surely they'd come running.

Plus, I wanted to try out my new bullets. They were supposed to be homing, which would help immensely with my terrible aim.

We crept around the Subway, bathed by the lava's heat. I wondered what this place would have been like when it was just a subway and not a lava-filled, Aragami-infested battleground. Could I have fit in here? Could a mute fit in anywhere?

I shook those thoughts away. Earlier I had said that the only way to keep questions like that at bay was to keep moving forward. But obviously this pace was too slow to keep them away. So, I sped up.

Soma seemed surprised as I dashed past him, but he didn't comment. I left the cement part of humanity and entered into a desolate tunnel formed by Aragami wreckage. The myth of the bursting Aragami—caused by consuming lava—came to mind, and I shivered at the grey material lining the walls. The heat only got worse as I continued on. I heard footsteps and realized that Soma was running to catch up. I stopped as I got closer to a circle with a center of magma.

"What the hell was—"

Before he could say anymore, I had my hand over Soma's mouth. He glared at me, so I took it away, instead pointing to this bird-like thing standing in the corner. Two Cocoon Maidens were on either side of the circle.

Soma nodded, and I guessed that that was the Chi-You. He formed his hand into a gun; taking the hint, I switched to Gun Mode and fired off a few shots.

The shots flew up into the air and disappeared.

I stared. I knew I should have tested the bullet before I brought it into battle! I was just so pressed for time that I'd trusted this "CrimsonAvatar" and went along with it. God damn it.

Plus, I'd just embarrassed myself in front of Soma. He'd specifically asked me to switch to Gun Form, and I'd fired off a useless bullet? What was I—

Suddenly two arcs of blue crashed down upon the Chi-You. I stared. Wait. Was that my bullet that did that?

The Chi-You turned, charging towards us. I fired off another bullet, and, sure enough, two more arcs descended upon the Aragami.

The bullet actually worked! Thank you, CrimsonAvatar!

"Let's go, rookie!" Soma yelled, charging past me with his sword in hand. I copied his movement, switching to Blade Form.

First I attacked the Chi-You's legs. I was surprised when my strike glanced off with a metallic click. Was this thing made out of metal? I leapt back as the Chi-You clapped its hands where I'd been a moment before; a blow like that would've hurt.

I looked to see if Soma was having any more luck. He jumped up, bringing his sword down on the wings. To my surprise, a flash of green appeared where he'd struck. With that attack, Soma had done light damage, but it was more damage than I'd done.

_Well then._ I copied him, jumping up and delivering a flurry of attacks while I was in the air. Each strike flashed green before it disappeared.

So this was going to be an aerial battle.

I kept jumping and slashing until I heard Soma shouting something. When I landed, I leapt back, glancing at Soma.

"The signal, rookie!"

Right! The whole reason we'd sniffed out the Chi-You.

I ran farther back, watching as Soma drew the Chi-You's attention. With the precious seconds afforded to me, I sent out a signal to gather round.

"Good idea!"

I would've screamed if I didn't have so much self-control. Instead, I just jumped. Kota and Sakuya appeared from the Aragami gut tunnel, smiles on their faces.

"Idiots!" Soma snarled, blocking an attack from the Chi-You. "Don't just stand there! Fight!"

I nodded, though I was pretty sure the brunt of that command was directed at Kota and Sakuya.

X

**Soma**

"I have an introduction to make."

Tsubaki's bossy voice echoed throughout the Den. I looked up. Standing beside supervisor was a girl. She had white hair a lot like Song's and wore red plaid clothes. Lindow was nearby.

Song, Sakuya, and Kota all looked up also. When Tsubaki demanded that we stand, we were all forced to obey her orders.

"This is a New-Type recruit: she'll be joining your ranks today." Tsubaki continued.

"Nice to meet you." The girl said curtly. "My name is Alisa Illinichina Amiella. As of 1200 hours today, I've been transferred here from the Russia Branch. I look forward to working with you."

I nearly groaned. Not another rookie.

"Hey, girls are more than welcome here anytime!" Kota exclaimed.

I saw Sakuya roll her eyes at him. I wondered if I even had to be here. Too many rookies to deal with, and one more just got added to the pile.

"I'm amazed that you've survived so long around here with that frivolous attitude…" Alisa replied, running a hand dramatically through her hair.

"Huh?" Kota answered, oblivious to the fact that he just got told off by the new rookie.

"She doesn't have much experience in actual combat, but her scores in the simulated battle were quite stellar." Tsubaki interrupted before it could go any further, though she seemed entertained by Kota's comeuppance. "You'd better train hard, or she'll soon surpass you."

"Y-yes, ma'am." Kota replied, sounding disappointed.

"Alisa, I want you to serve under Lindow's supervision. Understood?"

"Yes, ma'am." Alisa replied smartly.

Tsubaki then turned to Lindow. "Lindow, I need to hand off some documents to you. So come with me. The rest of you can go back to your quarters. That's all."

With that said, Lindow and Tsubaki left for the elevator. Kota wasted no time in chatting up the new girl.

"Hey, hey… So you're from Russia? Isn't it freezing over there? Oh, but I guess with all the global warming these days, the temperatures are getting higher…"

I sighed. This was getting nowhere. Kota would just keep babbling on like an idiot, Sakuya would stay and be friendly, and Song…

Song was standing there. She didn't seem to be so impressed with the New-Type. Was that…a frown? Miss Annoyingly-Pleasant was _frowning_ at the rookie?

What an interesting development.

Just as I thought that, Song turned and left.

X

**Song**

I plopped myself down on my bed, exhausted.

It wasn't just the mission, which had been difficult. The Chi-You was as pesky as Hibari had described.

Plus, Alisa…

I honestly didn't really like her. She just seemed so…snobby. Like someone used to getting her way. Plus, the way she'd treated Kota was unfair. He had just been trying to be nice. She was new here, and fitting in didn't usually include insulting those who lived there. Sure, what she'd said about Kota was true…and during the lecture by Dr. Sakaki that had followed was also true… Kota did have a frivolous attitude and he didn't have much of a sense of duty. But she had no right to judge him without really knowing him, right?

_But you're judging her without really knowing her…_ The logical part of my brain piped up.

_Shut up._ I told it and shoved it back into the recesses of my mind.

For the moment, sleep was the most urgent need.


	14. XIV

XIV

**Song**

Of course it just so happened that I have to do a mission alone with Lindow and Alisa… And it just had to be _two_ Chi-Yous.

Lindow greeted Alisa and I at the starting position of the City of Mercy. The moments before he arrived had been quiet and awkward. I wasn't sure if Alisa was aware that I was mute or not, but it didn't matter because neither of us attempted to make conversation.

"Ah… I'm working with you two New-Types today." Lindow said as way of greeting. "I'll try not to get in your way, so don't mind me."

I smiled. As if Lindow could be bested by two rookies, New-Types or not.

"If you ask me, Old-Types should just stick to what Old-Types are capable of doing." Alisa replied primly.

My jaw nearly dropped. Seriously?! Being rude to Kota was semi-acceptable, but being rude to the _leader of her Unit _was completely unacceptable!

I was hating Alisa more and more by the minute.

Lindow laughed, taking such an insult completely in stride. "Well then, I'll see what I can do to live up to your expectations!"

He took a step forward, gently placing his hand on Alisa's shoulder.

Alisa jumped back with a cry, making me jump. What a violent reaction!

Lindow let his hand drop awkwardly. "Whoa… I can see you really can't stand me…"

"Oh… I-I'm sorry!" Alisa answered shakily. I wondered if this was the Alisa with her guard down. "It's nothing, I'm fine…"

Lindow laughed, easy-going as ever. "Just kidding. Hmmm…let's see… Listen up, Alisa. When things get chaotic, look up at the sky. Then find a cloud that looks like an animal. That will help you chill."

I glanced up at the sky, trying to be discreet. It didn't seem too peaceful. The sun cast rays of light, changed into multicolour by the thick smog. A couple of black clouds made their way leisurely across the sky. It didn't seem all that relaxing to me.

"Until then, stay here." Lindow continued. "That's an order. Afterwards, I want you to join us over there. Got that?"

"B-but why should I do such a thing?"

"Just look for a cloud, okay?" Lindow turned to me. "All right, we're going on ahead. Ready, Song?"

I nodded. Lindow walked past me and I followed, stealing a glance at Alisa. She was looking uncertainly up at the sky, much like what I had done earlier. Lindow leapt off the starting platform, leaving me to follow him. As we made our way down the alley, he spoke again.

"There's something about that kid…she seems to have a lot of baggage. Still, these days, who doesn't have some kind of tragedy in their lives?" Lindow stopped, looking me straight in the eye. "Since you're a New-Type like her…try to look out for her. All right?"

I hesitated. Awkward. I suppose Lindow couldn't know that I didn't really like Alisa…

Seeing my hesitation, Lindow added, "I know she hasn't really been acting too friendly, but it's hard for people to trust each other these days. Just try to get to know her. I'm sure she's not that bad!"

I nodded slowly. Lindow's face broke into a smile. "Thank you, Song. Come on, then!"

X

The next couple missions were pathetically easy; always dealing with small fries. Cocoon Maidens and Ogretails were easily dealt with. But at least that gave me materials to further upgrade my equipment.

Because I hate Chi-Yous so much, I thought making a blade out of their materials was appropriate. My Knife II turned into Wild Sword: Yang. I also upgraded my Railgun to Railgun II. After finding a Ceramic Plate, my Polished Buckler became Polished Buckler II. I also crafted and upgraded the Apega Gun to Apega II.

X

**Soma**

"Hey Alisa! Why don't you come sit with us?" Lindow called across the cafeteria.

I saw Song make a face at this. It nearly made me laugh. Now maybe she would understand how it felt to have a constant annoyance to bother her. Except she was lucky in that Alisa wasn't constantly trying to talk to her.

"Thank you." Alisa replied curtly, like she always did. She took a seat next to Song, much to Song's annoyance.

"I hope you have all been doing well on your missions." Alisa said, as if she was Lindow. As she said this, she glanced at Kota, making it well known that she was only talking about him.

"Of course we've been doing well!" Lindow answered with a laugh. "We're Gods Eaters, after all!"

"That doesn't seem to be a good enough reason for some people." Alisa shot another glance at Kota.

_Ah, so that's it._

Song would stiffen every time Alisa insulted Kota. That was why Song hated Alisa.

"And you…"

Song looked up, a horrified look on her face. Alisa had directed that last remark at her.

"You're my only fellow New-Type, correct? I thought you did pretty well on the Chi-You mission."

Song just stared. She seemed like she didn't know how to react. At least it was a compliment, as opposed to what Alisa usually dealt out.

"However, you have a tendency to charge into battle. While you are good at blocking attacks, the ones you don't block tend to be the more powerful attacks and you take a lot of damage. It just gives the medic more work and is an annoyance."

Never mind.

Song was…well, speechless. Before she could answer, Alisa continued.

"You're awfully quiet, aren't you? I've never heard you speak."

"That's because she's mute." Sakuya replied simply.

"Oh!" Alisa exclaimed. "Oh, I'm so sorry! I-I didn't realize…"

Song stared again. Alisa's face was turning red. She was obviously flustered.

And, much to my surprise, Song smiled at her.

X

**Song**

"Good job today, New-Type!"

I looked up in surprise. Lindow was standing there, but he quickly took the seat opposite me. I took another sip of my drink, giving him a quizzical look.

It had been a quiet evening in the lobby until Lindow showed up. My plan had been to hang out here for a while, followed by reading a chapter then going to bed. Kota was watching Bugarally in his room, but I had to decline his invitation to join him simply because I wasn't really interested in watching anything. Soma was…well, being Soma. And I had no idea where Sakuya was.

Seeing my questioning look, Lindow continued. "Even though she just insulted you, you answered kindly. That's what being a Gods Eater is about! That's what being a leader is about!"

I smiled at this. I wondered if I had taught Lindow the sign for leader. Deciding that I hadn't, I reached for my notepad.

For all my talk of spending a quiet evening in the lobby, I had expected a couple of people speaking to me.

I really don't think that I'm a leader!

Was my answer to Lindow's comment.

He laughed. "Sometimes I don't think I am, either! Maybe someday you'll be one. But for now you're just a rookie." He winked. "I knew you had it in you the moment you treated Soma like an actual person. It's rare for people to be able to forgive rudeness."

I blushed at this. Alisa still came off as snobby and rude, but those moments when she was caught off guard, when she became flustered by a simple comment or by an imagined slight…those were the moments when you could catch a glimpse of the real Alisa.

But that didn't mean that I'd forgiven her completely, and that made me feel petty. I found myself shaking my head as I thought that.

"Well, whatever." Lindow smiled. "Maybe one day, when I retire, you'll be leader. Then I'll be the one laughing at how you kept denying it!"

I don't like talk like this. It sounds like you're going to disappear…

Lindow laughed again. "Disappear? Me? Nah! If anything, I'll be fighting until they have to force me to retire! Either that, or until they run out of beer!"

I just shook my head, a little smile on my face. Lindow had a talent for turning dark talks to light ones.

"Speaking of beer, I'm gonna go see if Sakuya has some! See ya, Song!"

I waved as he left. With him gone, I returned to my quiet enjoyment of the evening, but I found that it wasn't so enjoyable anymore, so I went to bed early.


	15. XV

XV

**Soma**

"So, are you ready to take your revenge?"

I glanced up. Lindow was sitting there, grinning at me. He turned his gaze to Song, a similar smile on his face.

"What is it now?" I asked, taking a bite of eggs. Whenever Lindow had a smile like that, something was amiss.

Lindow's smile just widened. He looked between Song and I again, which wasn't much of a chore considering we were seated beside each other, at Sakuya's insistence. "Do you happen to remember the circumstances of Song's arrival at Fenrir?"

Song nodded at this. Of course she would remember. I didn't even know why she bothered confirming it.

As for me…it had been a long time ever since the attack on the Ghetto, but I remembered. I remembered how she'd stupidly dragged me along, managed to find a Vajra, and nearly got killed by it because she wanted to be a heroic dumbass.

I noticed that Song absent-mindedly had her hand over her chest, which probably still showed the scars of the Vajra's attack. If I looked really hard, I could see three silvery scars on her face, another wound caused by the Aragami, or so I assumed. Bias Factor injections could heal wounds without so much as a scar, but it didn't work on scars gained before the injections.

I reluctantly nodded. The only reason that memory had any inkling of good in it was because the branch had gained a good fighter out of it.

Good fighter?

Lindow banished that thought from my mind as he continued to speak. "Well, you'll be fighting a Vajra today!"

Song started her message with a raised finger and a clenched fist, her curled fingers faced away from her. She twirled her finger so that her clenched fingers faced herself. Then she pointed at herself and finally at me.

Lindow laughed. "No, not only you and Soma! Sakuya and Kota will be accompanying you."

"Since when are you allowed to assign missions to us?" I growled. Stupid Lindow. Putting me on another mission with two rookies. The least he could do was come with us, but apparently he found it more fun to torture me.

"Since…" Lindow tapped a finger to his bottom lip, an exaggerated thinking pose that suited him all too well. "Because I felt like it."

"I suppose I could have told you about the mission earlier, but Lindow told me not to." Sakuya smiled. "Apparently Big Boss wanted to deliver a little speech to make it seem cooler."

"Mission success, I think." Lindow stretched. "Well, I have my own mission to get to. Oh, by the way, it's an urgent mission, so hop to it!"

"Urgent!" Kota screamed. "Why didn't you tell us sooner! We need to go, and quickly!"

He jumped to his feet, running to the other side of the table. He grabbed Song by the shoulders, hoisting her out of her chair.

"We've got to go, Song! Ghetto kids, unite!"

She just stared at him in confusion while he dragged her away.

"He realises the he can't start the mission without us, right?" Sakuya asked.

Lindow laughed. "Probably not."

"What a frivolous attitude." Alisa sniffed.

"Well, we better go." Sakuya said, looking at me. I nodded.

X

"You're so slow!" Kota whined.

He was waiting at the starting point for the Old City. I look around. Where was Song?

Then I saw her. Song was lying on the ground facedown. Her God Arc was nearby. She wasn't moving at all.

"What did you do to her?" I asked.

Kota got a weird look on his face—halfway grinning, halfway smirking. "Oh, nothing that you haven't done yet, I assume."

"What the hell do you mean, rookie?" I growled.

From the ground, Song groaned.

"She's fine." Kota waved his hand dismissively. "She just collapsed like that after I made her run all the way here."

"Kota!" Sakuya cried.

Song lifted an arm. She formed an O with her fingers, followed by what looked like a K. OK.

Sakuya sighed, shaking her head. She turned to Kota. "Just because you have endless energy doesn't mean everyone else does."

"Sorry!" Kota answered, a sheepish grin on his face. I imagined how different the reaction to that would have been if _I_ had said it.

Ignoring those two, I walked over to Song. "Get up, rookie."

No response, just another groan.

"Idiot." I growled. I grabbed the collar of her hoodie, pulling her viciously to her feet. She struggled, managing to latch on to me in the process.

"Let go of me, you idiot!" I yelled, pushing her off.

I turned to see that both Sakuya and Kota had little smirks on their faces.

"A little rough, don't cha think?" Kota said. Sakuya just giggled.

"Let's just get this over with." I growled.

X

**Song**

Vajra. Weak to Blaze, Freeze, and Divine. Equipment: Heat Drill P Short Sword with Apega II Sniper (x1.20 Blaze). Shots equipped: Blaze Missiles.

So why did I feel so unprepared?

We were led by Soma into the cathedral. I looked around. Tall windows lined the walls, dappling floor with patches of multi-coloured light. A gaping hole at the front of the cathedral revealed faded sky. The walls crumbled in places, reinforcing the whole look of ancient ruin.

I hated it.

It was dim in here and the light played tricks on the eyes. I found myself wondering if the shadows really were moving or if it was an illusion.

"Stop daydreaming." Soma growled, snapping me out of my trance. He must have noticed me standing there, staring into the shadows. "The Vajra will be here soon."

I looked at him curiously. How could he know such a thing?

"What, are your Aragami senses tingling?" Kota asked mockingly. I shot him a warning glance, to which he just shrugged, the grin still on his face.

Soma narrowed his eyes at him, but said nothing.

"I think I hear something." Sakuya said with a frown.

I listened closely, trying to still my breath. Sure enough, there was the thump of heavy footsteps far in the distance.

"Be careful." Sakuya said as the footsteps…no, pawsteps neared. "Vajra are highly mobile. It's important to be light on your feet in both attack and defense."

I nodded, gulping. I could do quick. I could be light. Hopefully. Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. Flee like a cockroach.

No, no fleeing!

My thoughts were interrupted as the Vajra charged into the chapel, obviously having spotted us.

Soma charged and I took that as my cue to move.

I switched to Gun Form, firing off as many bullets as possible. The Vajra turned towards me, gazing down with a furious look. It leapt at me.

I rolled out of the way, hearing the impact of the Vajra's landing where I had been a moment before. I scrambled away, trying to regain my balance but still trying to run. The Vajra turned towards me again and I switched to Blade Form, striking at its face.

The attack only reflected green.

_Damn it! _I thought. This wasn't going to work!

I jumped back as the Vajra slammed a paw into the ground, a fierce roar sprouting from its lips.

Soma charged, delivering a savage blow to the Aragami's head. His hit reflected red.

_Is it just because I'm weak?_

"Don't just stand there gawking!" Soma yelled at me.

I nodded, trying to get myself to move again. Soma hit heavier than me. Blades had different properties, right? Buster blades specialized in Sunder and Crush. Short Blades had Sunder and Pierce! So that must mean that the Vajra's face was weak to Crush.

_There's no use if I attack its face! I need to find a different spot to hit!_

The Vajra suddenly jumped towards me. I ducked, feeling its large body sail over my head. It landed and I whirled around. Sakuya had just recovered from a roll and was aiming again.

I charged towards the Vajra's back legs, striking.

Red!

In my mind, I cheered. I slashed away at the legs until the Vajra suddenly stiffened. Raising its head, it let loose a savage roar, the orange fringes on its back rising and spreading like a flower. The air around it began to crackle.

"Get away from there!" Soma yelled.

Dashing back just in time, the circle exploded into a frenzy of electricity. I covered my eyes from the brightness, feeling the powerful blast robbing the air from my lungs.

Still semi-blinded and gasping for air, I switched to Gun Form again, firing off more Blaze Missiles. They missed their mark as the Vajra moved, and before I could react it had pounced.

I found myself pinned under its paw, all the air knocked from my lungs. I could only half keep track of what had happened; blind spots still danced in front of my eyes. But I got the general idea: I was in big trouble.

"Song!" Kota screamed.

Suddenly Soma was there, delivering a heavy blow to the Vajra's face. Moments later shots exploded, and I recognized them as Kota's bullets. The Vajra reeled back under the barrage, stepping off of me.

Soma wrenched me to my feet the exact way he had done before the mission. But this time I didn't flail around. I was too busy trying to get the air back into my lungs.

"Be careful, idiot!" Soma growled, and then he was off again.

Sakuya shot a recover bullet my way, and I suddenly found that I could breathe again.

The Vajra roared again, and my armlet rumbled with the message that it was enraged.

Sakuya had revitalized me. And with this revitalization came the realization of how close that had been. Without Soma and Kota, I would be dead. And without Sakuya I would still be a useless lump, gasping for air.

I charged at the Vajra, ducking under its torso and slashing like mad. If I was always dependent on the others to get me out of a tough situation, how could I be strong? I wanted to be the one protecting them!

Each blow that connected brought that unreachable feeling closer. It was that reckless abandon, that sentiment of completeness. I embraced it, unwilling to let those doubts pester me any longer. This was battle. There should be no doubt, there should be no self-reflection. That was for rainy days only. Today was a day with lightning. There was no rain to fall. Inside me there was rage, and that flame could only be fed through destruction.

Time to destroy.


	16. XVI

XVI

**Song**

"What?" Soma suddenly said.

I looked up. Approaching us were two people: Alisa and Lindow.

Upon the defeat of the Vajra, Soma was leading us around the City of Mercy for a final look-out before we returned to the base. We had just returned to the entrance of the chapel when we spotted them.

"You guys?" Lindow asked. He sounded surprised, and that made me worried.

"Huh? What are you doing here, Lindow?" Kota asked, voicing the question that was running through my head.

"Why would they send two teams to the same section?" Sakuya asked. From the tone of her voice, I could tell that it was not only unusual, but also worrisome. "What does this mean?"

"Let's worry about that later." Lindow put a hand up, stopping Sakuya's approach. "We need to wrap this up and head back. We'll take the inside. You guys check the outside. Got that?"

We all nodded, fanning out to stand on guard in front of the entrance. Lindow led Alisa inside.

"I don't like this at all." Soma muttered under his breath.

There was definitely something…strange about this. To deal with threats, Fenrir sent out groups of up to 4 people out to a location. So why did they send out two groups? That was unheard of!

Suddenly there was a roar from inside.

A roar that was mirrored by 3 Aragami that leapt in front of us.

I looked at them in shock. So many of them! And appearing so suddenly! They looked like the Vajra we had just faced, but different. For one, they were coloured with pale blue and with white. Instead of the air being tainted with charge, the air seemed chilled around them. Most of all, their faces were more feminine, framed by white spikes.

"No! Stop it!" Someone screamed from inside. From the pitch, I knew it was Alisa.

A blast came from inside, along with the rumble of heavy things falling to earth.

What the hell was happening in there?!

"Soma, Kota!" Sakuya yelled. "You two stay outside! Song and I will check it out inside!"

"Right!" Kota yelled in answer, voice serious for once.

Sakuya and I ran inside. We were greeted by the sight of Alisa collapsed on the ground, legs splayed as she emptily gazed at the rubble. The entrance to the chapel itself was sealed shut by rubble, dust clogging the air.

"Alisa!" Sakuya yelled, running to her. "What have you done?"

"No…no… Daddy… Mommy… I…I didn't mean it…" Was Alisa's broken answer.

Only then did the enormity of what was happening sink in. Lindow was still trapped inside, and from the roar earlier, it sounded like there was also one of those blue-white Vajras stuck in there with him. His partner was on the ground, speaking gibberish. That left only our group ready to fight. The Vajra had been difficult enough, but now we had to deal with three clones!

Her breath nearing a panicked state, Sakuya levelled her gun at the rubble. She fired off a shot, but the stone did not even quiver.

Suddenly there was a yell, and one of the Aragami leapt into the narrow space, Kota pinned underneath it.

_Dammit! _I rushed at the beast, slashing desperately at its face. Like the Vajra, my hits were like nothing. But the Aragami shifted, Kota scrambling to his feet and away from it. A shot exploded against the Aragami's flank, and I recognized Sakuya's lasers.

I leapt at the Aragami again, but it turned and all I could hit was its face.

Soma jumped back suddenly, facing one of the Vajra-look-alikes on his own.

"Hurry the hell up, or we'll be surrounded!" He yelled, delivering a heavy blow that sent the Aragami reeling. He and Kota leapt back outside.

"Take Alisa back to the Den with you." Lindow's face came from behind the rocks. All traces of mirth were gone, replaced with dead-seriousness. "That's an order!"

"But…" Sakuya protested, only to be cut short by Lindow.

"Didn't you hear me?" He yelled. "Take Alisa and head back to the Den, damn you! Sakuya! Take charge of the others! Soma, find a way out of here."

_We're going to die if we stay here!_

"Daddy… Mommy…" Alisa said, voice desperate and sad. "I didn't mean it…"

"Hurry, Lindow! Come with us!" Sakuya yelled desperately at the rocks.

_Sakuya, come on! Don't you see we need to leave?!_

"I'd like to, but I think I'll mess with these guys first… Save some rationed beer for me!"

_Lindow's sacrificing himself for us! Let's go!_

"No! Then I'll stay and fight, too!"

_Sakuya, run!_

"Sakuya…" Lindow 's answer was exasperated. "I'm ordering you! Make sure you get everyone home alive!"

Kota came running up, a fact barely noticed by me in my panicked state. This was wrong, all wrong. I felt like I was going to be sick.

"No!" Sakuya screamed, taking a step forward.

Kota grabbed her arm, pulling her back. She struggled in his grip. "Sakuya, come on! If we stay, we'll all end up dead!"

"I won't go! Lindow!"

That was when I lost it.

I tackled Sakuya until she was pinned to the wall, my hands on her shoulders. She looked at me in surprise, the same glance I felt on my back.

I choked back a sob. No! No crying! I was trying to knock some sense into her! I couldn't be crying!

Those thoughts materialized into my head shaking vigorously, but that couldn't stop the tears. I gritted my teeth, anything to stop their flow. My whole body was numb from fear and sorrow and anger. Anger at Lindow for giving up, anger at myself for wanting to run away, all because of the fear.

"Song, stop it!" Kota grabbed my arm, easily pulling me back. All my strength was focused on standing up and not buckling under all the emotion.

Sakuya stood there for a second, as mute as I. "Let's…go." She whispered.

I nodded, throat raw from holding back tears and from spilling tears. I only vaguely noticed as Kota pulled Alisa onto his back. I was too busy stumbling after Sakuya as we left the chapel.

As we left Lindow behind.

X

_God fucking damn it!_

The pillow flew across my room.

_I did nothing! We just ran away!_

My fist planted itself into the wall.

I felt tears spring to my eyes, and I once again pushed myself into rage to avoid them. I kicked my bed. But the pain of that just made the tears flows harder, and that was when I gave up.

I let myself fall to the bed, crossing my arms over my head in place of the tossed pillow. I no longer tried to stop the sobs, no matter how much they hurt my throat. My head ached from the pain of crying and from the pain of regret.

I cried under my eyes felt dry and my throat ached. For a second I hoped that maybe now I could sleep, but I realized that it would be impossible. Even though all my pent-up emotion had been released, my throat was dry and begged for water.

I glanced at the time. It was 1:28 a.m. Too early for anyone to be up, right? Still sniffling and knowing that my eyes were red, I decided that I could probably make it to the mess hall and grab a glass of water—no, a water bottle—without being seen.

That thought gave me strength. I crawled out of bed, but shivered. Tearing the comforter from it, I wrapped myself in a cocoon. Now I would look like a real mess if someone saw me. I laughed a little at the image, but my throat just hurt from doing so.

Deciding that the comforter really did fit its name, I opened the door and snuck through the empty halls towards the mess hall. In the darkness the tables and chairs looked eerie, so I focused my attention on the open package of water bottles, thankful that they left them out during the night.

Satisfied and with bottle in hand, I turned back towards the door.

Except my blanket seemed to be caught on something.

I frowned, trying to pull the blanket harder. But it resisted, nearly tearing itself from my grasp. I turned around, trying to find what had hooked my comforter. Without really looking I took a step forward and bumped into something.

Or rather, someone.

I nearly jumped out of my skin, a scream shattering the air. With a jolt I realized it was mine.

A warm hand was placed over my mouth. I tried to take a step back to escape, but whoever it was managed to find my arm in the blanket and stop me from running away.

"Calm down, god damn it!"

Soma.

I relaxed, but then tensed up again. I knew how I must have looked: hair in a mess, eyes red from crying. Not to mention wrapped in a blanket like I was a little kid.

My cheeks warmed in embarrassment. I wanted Soma's hand off my mouth, but both of my hands were full; one holding the blanket close, the other holding my water bottle.

"You're not going to scream?" Soma asked, and I shook my head. I had only screamed out of surprise. With my answer he moved his hand away. "Sorry. I was just surprised that a mute can scream."

I shrugged a little. Because I wasn't physically mute I could still scream. Plus, a scream wasn't words, and I was just worried about—

Wait, had Soma apologized to me?!

Everyone was acting weird ever since Lindow's—

_Shit! Why did I have to think of that!_

But it was too late. The corners of my eyes felt wet, and I cursed myself. Stupid me, thinking I was done with crying!

Soma frowned as I felt a tear leak down my cheek. He sighed, as if he'd been dealing with his emotionally distraught teammates all day. "Sit down."

I obeyed, finding the nearest chair. My blanket pooled at my feet, like a queen's cape. I didn't feel like a queen. If anything I was the queen of stupidity.

Soma pulled up a chair beside me, making his annoyance clear by his crossed legs and face towards the roof, as if trying to find patience there. Finally he sighed, looking back at me.

"Look. It's probably true that Lindow's dead." Soma winced as he said this. "But do you honestly think that just moping around is going to help anything?"

I sniffled, but the tears were no longer falling. Even though Soma wasn't being exactly comforting, for some strange reason just hearing his voice was enough.

I think I _was_ going crazy.

"So instead of just crying," Soma continued, "We should just continue as we are."

I nodded. It made a lot of sense. It was stupid of me to think that by joining the Gods Eaters I would escape all the death. If anything, this was where death was prominent.

"Now get back to bed." Soma's voice sounded harsh, and I realized that his earlier words had almost some…kindness behind them. "I want to finish my sandwich in peace."

I looked around. Sure enough, there was a half-eaten sandwich lying on the table. I blushed. Of course. I hadn't even wondered why Soma was here. Now it was obvious.

Standing, I went to leave. But I stopped again. I turned towards Soma, signing "Thank you".

"Whatever." Soma answered.

I left.


	17. XVII

XVII

**Song**

At breakfast, you could tell that everyone's spirits were down. You could see it in the dark bags under their red-rimmed eyes and the way they slouched at the table, poking at their food with no real intent of eating it.

"We have a mission today." Sakuya said flatly.

"Really?" Kota asked. "Is it…a search?"

Sakuya shook her head. "Just…elimination. But it is in the City of Mercy."

The hash brown that I'd been about to spear onto my fork remained intact. The City of Mercy. What were they thinking, sending us there? Even if Soma had comforted me last night, it was still much too early for me to return there. Maybe if it was a search mission it would be fine, but a regular hunting mission?

"What are we hunting?" Soma asked. He was the only one that sounded like his regular self.

"Chi-You." Sakuya replied simply.

Chi-You. The last one I'd hunted was on a mission with Lindow and Alisa…one was missing and the other was in the hospital and couldn't have any visitors.

_She deserves to be there._

I tried to push that thought out of my mind, but it resisted, hiding in a dark corner and whispering such dangerous thoughts. Lindow had told me that it was important to forgive people for being rude. That obviously applied to people who had made mistakes, didn't it?

The thought of Lindow made me clench my jaw. No. No weakness today. We were supposed to do a mission.

"Well." Kota said, no enthusiasm in his voice. "Let's go."

X

Everyone's moves were lethargic. Painful to watch. Kota's bullets fired at a slow rate, not the frenzy they usually were. Sakuya missed her mark every time the Chi-You moved, no longer predicting its movement to ensure a hit. Only Soma battled like he normally did.

I couldn't even tell how I was battling. Every movement I saw was too fast for me to understand; surely the Chi-You was never as speedy as this. Every once and a while a dense fog would move in and I'd feel wetness in my eyes. What kind of crazy weather was this? The others didn't seem affected by it. Plus, I was completely numb. Could humidity do that to you?

But it didn't matter. I still leapt up and swung my blade, I still did damage to the Chi-You. It took longer than it usually did, but eventually the Chi-You ran to go feed, in the hope that it could repair the damage done to its cells.

As we charged after it, I caught my breath. It was headed straight for the cathedral.

I stopped before the entrance. There was no way I could go in there.

"Song?" Sakuya asked gently. I could hear her own fear, pulsing in her voice underneath the flatness. "Are you alright?"

I took a deep breath. People died all the time. As a Gods Eater, I put my life on the line to save the regular humans. Lindow did the same. This was not about Lindow, this was about protecting those who couldn't protect themselves.

I put on a smile that felt fake and nodded. Then I charged ahead before anyone could call me out on my lie.

The inner entrance was unblocked, free of the heavy stones that had locked Lindow away in what must have been his death. Someone must have moved them, even though we could not. But, then again, the entrance showed signs of an explosion: bits of rock poked at my feet and the walls surrounding it were charred. I still did not take comfort in knowing that there was probably nothing I could have done.

I stepped into the chapel, once again having to draw a deep breath. Was this where Lindow died?

"Pay attention, rookie." Soma growled. I looked up and saw that the Chi-You was charging towards us. I quickly switched to Gun Form and fired away.

But my attention shifted to the floor. The ground showed no signs of a scuffle. Had they cleaned even that up? It was pristine, free of blood or flesh, anything that would show the signs of a battle.

_Stop thinking about that! _I reminded myself as I missed my shot. Pretty talented, considering they were homing missiles.

With my OP bar emptied, I changed to Blade Form. I jumped and struck at the Chi-You's wings, green spurting from the hit. When I landed, I saw dust rise around my feet, making lazy swirls in the air before settling back down.

Wait…if there was so much dust, there couldn't have been much of a cleanup. So maybe there were still signs of where Lindow went, assuming he didn't die? Unless the air was just naturally dusty?

"Song!" Kota suddenly yelled.

_What?_ I thought. But then the Chi-You swung its arm, backhanding me.

I flew with the blow, hitting the wall of the cathedral. When I fell to the ground, I realized I couldn't move.

_What…what's happening?! _The panicked part of my brain thought. But then I remembered the armlet's safety mechanism.

Basically, whenever a Gods Eater took too much damage, the armlet would forcibly shut the body down. I didn't know exactly how, but it had something to do with the Bias Factor, I think. Even though I listened to Dr. Sakaki's lectures, I still had a hard time understanding half of what he said. The shutdown of the body was meant to stop the over damaged Gods Eater from further hurting his or herself. There was only so much damage a Gods Eater's body could take, heightened powers or not. In this state, Aragami would not attack, simply because they saw you as dead prey—and by some kind of magic, even though it was most likely science, they did not want to eat you.

Even though the 'incapacitation state', as it was called, would save many lives, there was still something terrifying about it.

I tried to push myself up, but found I could barely make it up before my arms went weak and I fell again. My heart began to race; I could feel the countdown start. If 30 seconds passed without my team-mates reviving me, or if there was no one to revive me, the armlet would knock me out and send a help request to base. I would be rescued, brought back to the starting point, and one of my team's respawns would be gone. One more respawn before we are forced to retreat.

One second passed, but it felt like forever. Being pinned to the ground was a humbling experience. I watch the feet of my teammates shuffling around, heard the impact of their bullets and strikes, but couldn't do anything myself.

_Maybe I should just lie here while they fight._ I thought, closing my eyes and ceasing to struggle.

I was roused a moment later by a surge of strength. My eyes snapped open.

"Don't you dare die." Soma growled. Then he pulled on my hoodie, forcing me to my feet. It was becoming a familiar gesture. I still appreciated the boost, even if it meant I choked every time. Plus, he hadn't give me much health, so I was still kinda winded—

Wait. Had Soma actually sounded _worried_, for a second?

But of course! Lindow had said that Soma was most afraid of his comrades dying…and surely I was his comrade!

The warm thought wiped away what usually would have been a cold thought because of Lindow. I was happy that Soma considered me with such high esteem!

Buoyed by the thought, I charged back into battle.


	18. XVIII

XVIII

**Song**

_It's rare for people to be able to forgive rudeness._

I took a deep breath.

_Even though she just insulted you, you answered kindly. That's what being a Gods Eater is about! That's what being a leader is about!_

That was why I was standing outside the medical bay door, hoping that I could get in to see Alisa. I was about to raise a fist to knock when I heard a pained cry.

"Don't look at me…"

I shuddered. That was definitely Alisa's voice.

"Just leave me alone…" She cried. "Stay away! Leave me alone…leave me alone!"

Tsubaki's bossy voice drowned out Alisa's pain. "Give her a tranquilizer! And change the padding!"

"Oh… I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry… Daddy…Mommy…it's not…it's not what you think!"

"It's me." Tsubaki said, her voice no longer demanding. Instead, it was a tad bit gentle. "Do you recognize me, Alisa?"

"I didn't! I didn't mean to do it! You're wrong! It wasn't me! It wasn't my fault!"

Tsubaki gasped.

I instantly felt guilty. No, it wasn't Alisa's fault that Lindow was gone. And obviously she was torturing herself over it.

Forgive for rudeness, forgive for mistakes.

"Leave me alone!" Alisa screamed. "You should've just left me alone!"

That was it. I was going in.

Just as I was reaching for the door, a voice interrupted me.

"Oh, it's you."

I turned around and saw a man walking towards me. It was kind old Dr. Oguruma, easily recognizable by his bright orange-yellow shirt and hat and the white lab coat. He was the true doctor here. He'd been the one who'd treated me when I first came to the Far East Branch.

"You'd better not see her right now." He said a little sadly.

I gave him a confused look.

"Once the medication wears off, she falls to pieces." Dr. Oguruma explained. "You should come back another day."

I nodded just as Alisa screamed "No!".

"I'm sure she wouldn't want you to see her in that state either."

I took a deep breath, then nodded. It was true. Alisa was much too prideful. She would never want me to see her like that.

X

My sleep was restless, plagued by a nightmare I thought had long since gone.

It was me, a child again. I watched as my mother held up a bundle of rags and stuffing, a mess that was so very dear to me. Mr. Tuffles the rabbit.

My mother's mouth was moving, a soft voice coming from her lips. "I'm sorry, humming bird. I think that Mr. Tuffles needs to retire."

I ignored her use of my nickname. Humming bird was an endearment giving to me after "I came out of the womb humming". It also happened to be the source of my name.

"He doesn't need to retire!" I screamed.

My dad rushed into the room, relaxing when he saw we were safe. He'd been tense lately, all because he was worried about the warnings of large Aragami.

"What's the matter?" He asked, watching as I tried to reach for the rabbit, only to have my mother jerk it away.

My mother sighed, ignoring the question but still answering it. "We can get you a new rabbit, Song. I'm sure Mr. Oguri would be willing to make you a new one!"

"I don't want a new one!" I whined. "I want Mr. Tuffles!"

My father placed a gentle hand on my shoulder, but I tore myself from his grasp. "It's alright, Song. Mr. Tuffles is too old to play with you anymore."

"He's not old!" I screamed, tears beginning to leak onto my face. I made another desperate grab at the rabbit, but my mother evaded the attempt.

"I hate you!" I screamed. "I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!"

With that I rushed from the house, leading my parents to their deaths.

Except this time the nightmare seemed to be more merciful than usual.

Or at least that was what it seemed like. As I ran, the street beneath me turned from degrading cobble to pure black. My steps became silent. I watched as everything else faded away, replaced by shadow. Somehow I knew that with each step I'd taken, I'd gotten older. Suddenly I found that I couldn't take another step, and I felt like me again instead of a young girl.

"Now what?" I murmured.

A couple seconds passed before I realized something.

_I'd just spoken_.

"Hello?" I said out loud, just to make sure that I really had a voice.

Well, that wasn't exactly correct. I did have a voice. But the only reason I didn't use it was because of the crippling fear and guilt that always followed my speech. It was hard to describe. It was as if my body stopped me from speaking to save myself from that pain. It had never really been a struggle for me. Once I realized that my voice killed people, I'd barely spoken and then stopped altogether.

But here…here, when I spoke, I wasn't plagued by guilt and fear.

I laughed. "Hello there! My name is Song Minami, and I'm the new rookie at the Far East Branch! I'm also the Branch's first New-Type, which basically means that I can switch my God Arc between Blade and Gun Form at will!"

The darkness didn't answer, but I wasn't bothered by that. I continued to talk.

Well, babble really. My voice sounded strange to my ears, but with every word I said I grew used to it. I talked about everything that had happened ever since I'd joined the Far East Branch. I smiled when I talked about Kota and I's Kongou takedown, I cried about Lindow's disappearance.

But there was one thing that I left out.

Or, rather, one person.

"I guess I should talk about Soma now." I told the shadows. There was no answer, as always, so I continued.

"Soma seems really mean, but he's actually really kind. Lindow told me that the reason he acts so rude is because he doesn't want anyone to get close to him. And that's because he's terrified of seeing a comrade die in front of his eyes. A couple of days ago we were fighting a Chi-You in the City of Mercy. I guess I wasn't ready to fight so soon after Lindow's disappearance. The Chi-You ended up incapacitating me, and Soma went to help me right away. But the weirdest thing was that as he helped me he said 'Don't you dare die!'. I was really happy that he considers me his comrade, even though I seem to annoy him."

I paused. "It's kind of weird, though. Around him I feel different than around the others. With them, I'm not worried about how I act. I know that they'll accept me no matter what. But around Soma I'm always thinking about what I should do. I just don't want him to think of me as an annoying rookie. I know that no matter what I do he'll always consider me as that, but I still feel like I need to impress him."

I went silent again, but the lure of talking made me start again.

"It's weird. Whenever he approves of me, I feel so warm inside. I've never seen him smile, but I desperately want to. It's so weird. I never feel so desperate to impress Sakuya or Kota or Alisa or Lindow. It's just with Soma."

I laughed to myself as I reflected on my speech. I had said 'weird' too many times. But I could think of no better way to explain it.

"I wonder if he'd be happy if I started to speak again?"

A hand closed itself over my throat.

I desperately tried to pull it off, but I could only watch as another shadowy hand forced itself into my mouth. I started to choke, but every time I reached for the black hand it disappeared, although its presence was still felt.

I felt the fingers reaching down my throat, tearing a path. And somehow I knew that they were pulling my voice right out of me.

I awoke in a panic.

Something was plugging my mouth. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't even speak, couldn't yell. That thought had me tearing desperately at whatever was in my mouth.

My sudden movement sent me falling off the bed. For a moment I was buried in blankets. One snagged my arm, but I still managed to pull the soggy piece of cloth from my mouth. Still under the effects of panic, I trashed around until I was free, stumbling to my feet and reaching for the light switch. Only when the light turned on, illuminating the room, did I relax.

There was no mystery attacker. No one tried to silence me in my sleep. I picked my cover off the floor, feeling a wet section. I realized that I must have somehow gotten the blanket in my mouth, and that was why I woke up.

I had been talking.

I opened my mouth, but no sound came out. I didn't allow a sound to come out.

I bit back a sob, but couldn't stop the tears. Tiredly, I replaced the covers and curled up underneath them.

I was lucky that the nightmare didn't find me again.

* * *

Phew, that was painful! XD

Sorry for taking a while to update. :( I've just been ridiculously busy and tired from school. I seriously haven't had a day off in two weeks, and that isn't likely to change over the Christmas break where all my crazy relatives come visit. I need sleep, and desperately. And then, on the second day I get back to school, I have my first final exam. That marks the beginning of exam-crazy January. Bleh.

I'll try my best to write during my free time, but please don't expect much!

Well, anyway, as always thank you all so much for your support! :) The fact that I still get reviews makes me really happy, considering I must be the worst updater ever. XD Haha, so sorry about that!


	19. XIX

XIX

**Song**

It was a couple of days later that Hibari approached me as I was sitting in the lobby.

Even though it had been four days since Lindow's disappearance, no one showed any sign of cheering up. I'd even heard the defense squad arguing with Tsubaki over sending them out on a search.

You could see how Lindow's disappearance affected everyone. It had been like just after Eric's death, except worse because everyone knew Lindow. He was so well-respected. Some people had even considered him invincible.

To an extent, I'd thought so too.

"Hey, Song!" She greeted me, interrupting my perusal of the vendor's items. "I know you were….uh….asking about Alisa…"

What was it with everyone stumbling over verbs involving speech? They were just words. It's not like it bothered me.

I nodded, trying not to betray my annoyance. That would probably just make it all worse.

"Well, Alisa can now have supervised visitors…" Hibari sighed. "But there's still no sign of recovery."

I nodded again. Apparently that was all Hibari had to say, because she turned around and went back to her desk.

_Well, better now than never._

I stood up and headed towards the hospital.

X

"It's no use trying to talk. I've received some very effective tranquilizers. She won't regain consciousness any time soon." Dr. Oguruma told me.

I nodded, looking sadly at the bed.

It was true that Alisa looked completely out of it. She mumbled something in her sleep, but I couldn't make out any words. She seemed paler than usual, almost. For some reason, her pale blue hospital shirt made her seem paler than her bright red plaid outfit did.

I didn't know what I had hoped to accomplish.

The silence stretched into awkward proportions. Dr. Oguruma busied himself with…well, whatever doctors did, while I tried to figure something out.

Really, what had I hoped for? Visiting Alisa while she was unconscious was pointless, wasn't it?

But she looked so hopeless, lying on that hospital bed. She mumbled something incoherent in her sleep. Maybe she was having a nightmare, like I had had.

I saw her hand twitch a little. Without thinking, I reached for it.

The moment our fingers brushed, images flashed in my head.

A …Vajra…? A woman stood in front of it, it was lunging. Then its face peered at me through a crack in…something. A door? Then…Lindow?!

I blinked as the images disappeared, and it returned to me sitting on a stool by Alisa's bedside, my hand on hers.

Alisa's eyes snapped open.

But…what about the tranquilizers?!

"What?" She murmured. Then her voice grew stronger. She turned her to me. "Where am I? Why am I…?"

I could only stare at her. The same thoughts were crossing my head. A shiver ran down my spine.

"S-she actually regained consciousness?" When I turned to look, Dr. Oguruma had his mouth wide open, his cigarette—wait, why was a doctor smoking in the hospital, anyway?!—staying miraculous in his mouth. "Impossible! E-excuse me!"

He turned and bolted for the door.

I straightened, my hand leaving Alisa's. I glanced at it. It was still my plain old hand, with my plain old armlet on my wrist.

"Just now… you…"

I looked back at Alisa. Apparently the tranquilizers kicked back in, because her eyes fluttered shut.

Shakily, I stood. Dr. Oguruma was nowhere to be seen, and Alisa didn't open her eyes again.

Dr. Oguruma said that she was under the effect of tranquilizers. And then I'd touched her and saw weird images…a vision? And then she'd woken up and…

I stumbled out of the hospital, probably looking like an escaped patient instead of a visitor. I barely noticed Dr. Oguruma standing there on his phone before I rushed into the elevator.

And ran right into Soma.

Somehow he managed to catch my arm before I slipped and fell. The door slid shut before I had a chance to back out.

Soma frowned at me, still holding my arm. I was thankful for it. I doubted that I could stand without it.

"What the hell's wrong, rookie?" He growled.

I leaned against the wall of the elevator and he let go of my arm. I felt the familiar vibrations as the elevator started to move.

How could I possibly answer his question? I didn't even know what was wrong. So I just shook my head.

"Obviously something's wrong." He pressed.

I waved my hands uselessly. I didn't even try to form a word. It would have been impossible for him to understand, anyway.

So instead I changed the subject. I quickly touched my forehead, then brought my hand down, bending all my fingers except my thumb and pinky. Then I raised both of my hands, open palms facing up, moving them both in horizontal circles.

"Why here?" Soma frowned, then he seemed to get it. "Why am I here?"

I nodded.

He frowned, again. He did that a lot. "I'm going back to my room after lunch."

That made sense. The mess hall was on the very bottom floor, after all. I'd eaten lunch early and then had been hanging out in the lobby before going to visit Alisa.

"Why were you in the lab area?" Soma asked somewhat suspiciously.

I was interrupted by a ding. We'd reached the veteran area, where Soma would be leaving.

But he didn't. He crossed his arms and leaned back, letting the doors close.

Shit.

"Tell me." He commanded. "And while you're at it, why were you so panicked when you left?"

There was another ding. The moment the doors opened, I bolted. But I guess that Soma was too fast, or I was too slow with my wobbly legs. He easily grabbed my arm, stopping me mid step. Then he pushed me down the hallway and into my room.

He let go of my arm long enough to shut the door. I took a step back and he learned against the door, blocking my escape.

Soma didn't seem fazed by the glare I sent his way. "Tell me."

I shook my head.

He narrowed his eyes, but I still kept my mouth shut. Metaphorically or something like that.

"I'm not leaving until you tell me."

I put on a brave face. I turned my back on him, reaching into my fridge. One of my beers ended up being tossed at his head. Catching the can was easy with his Bias Factor heightened senses.

Wordlessly Soma opened the can and took a long drink. He raised an eyebrow when he was finished. "You're not gonna drink?"

I shook my head. I needed to stay focused. If I started to drink…I shuddered. I was a complete lightweight.

The first night I'd come here, I thought that it would be interesting to try beer. Mrs. Oguri didn't drink, so she'd never had any alcohol around the house. And I was the legal age limit. And they provided it. So why not?

Well, as I'd discovered after drinking only one beer, the answer to "why not" was "because you spend the entire day after completely sick". Not to mention the fact that after only half-a-can I'd started giggling at the way the fluorescent lights buzzed.

So no alcohol.

Soma took it in stride, finishing the beer easily. When he spoke, his words were clear and I was envious of him. "Why were you in the laboratory area?"

I sat on the window sill and crossed my arms.

"Fine then." Soma growled. "Did Doc Sakaki talk to you at all?"

I blinked. Doctor Sakaki? The only times I'd been with Doctor Sakaki was during lectures.

Soma must have been able to tell my answer by the expression on my face. "You haven't?" He frowned. Then he sighed. "Damn. Sorry for bothering you."

And then he just simply walked out of my room.

I blinked. Then blinked again.

So basically commanded me to talk because he'd something about Dr. Sakaki talking to me?! And saying something that made me react like I'd did?

But what the hell could that have been?

I'd touched Alisa and had a vision!

I shook my head as all the anomalies of the day came back to me. How the hell was I supposed to figure this all out? I wasn't a tactician, god damn it! I could barely understand Doc Sakaki's lessons, and now I had to figure out a bunch of mysteries on my own?

No thanks.

I sighed. This was too much to think about. What happened to today being a simple day?

Maybe Alisa could provide some answers.

* * *

Whew, this chapter was a long time coming! xD Sorry about that. Well, exams are finally over, so hopefully I'll be able to pick up the pace once again. My next semester shouldn't be too bad (hopefully)! I will update as often as I can. :)

As always, thank you for reading! I'm honoured to have people read and enjoy this. I really appreciate it. ;A; It makes me so emotional! haha.


	20. XX

XX

**Song**

The next day I found myself drawn to her room again.

I stealthily watched from the lobby as Dr. Oguruma stepped out of the hospital, heading to the elevator as I pretended to get a drink.

"Oh, Song!" He suddenly said, just when I thought he hadn't noticed me. I turned towards him. "If you want to visit Alisa, go right ahead."

I nodded, gulping as he walked into the elevator. Alright, so my stealth skills were null. I could sneak up on a feeding Aragami, but I guess I couldn't fool Dr. Oguruma.

_Well, he gave me permission._ So I grabbed a couple drinks from the vending machine, deciding that they were too tempting after my fake perusal, and headed into the hospital.

Alisa was asleep like the first time I'd come here, although this time her colour had returned. I was surprised that that reassured me. I suppose that it was hard to see even an enemy in a state like she had been in before.

The drinks were starting to freeze my hands, but I knew that the alternative to holding them was putting my hand out and touching her. And I knew, just knew, that that weird thing was going to happen again.

_Can drinks give you frostbite? _I wondered as my fingers went numb.

My next thought was, _To hell with this!_

I slammed the drinks onto the side table, making a mental note to wait a bit before opening them simply because I didn't want pop all over myself. Then, before I had a chance to hesitate, I lightly touched Alisa's finger.

This time the vision was all-consuming.

I felt young, somehow, probably similar to my dream where I felt myself grow with every walk. But, somehow, I also felt different. I felt like I was simply a visitor in my skin, instead of belonging in it. Like I was wearing a borrowed t-shirt instead of my own. But, somehow, I also felt as if I wasn't alone. As if someone was with me, or within me. It felt like Alisa, although I had no idea how Alisa "felt". She seemed drowsy, but growing more aware with every second.

"Here we come…" A warm voice called out, a creepy contrast against the foggy, chilly air. It echoed against the cold metal walls, sending shivers down my spine.

From my position in the wardrobe, I could see two dark figures cut through the fog.

This wasn't my house, I knew. The floor was different than mine. My parents were playing hide-and-seek with me. And I'd went to hide in the house beside mine.

Yes, that's it.

"Wait, not yet!" I, no Alisa, no, me, no…it didn't make a difference. For the moment she was me and I was her.

"Ready or not…" A male voice called out. Daddy.

"Here we come…" Now it was Mommy.

"Wait, not yet!" I yelled again, pulling the door of the wardrobe more closed, but still leaving a crack to peer through. A faint sense of unease came over me, as if something was wrong. Was there something wrong? It was cold because of the fog, but my parents were here. Everything would be fine.

So why was there such a strong sense of foreboding? Surely nothing could happen here.

"Here we come…"

"Ready or not…"

_No no no!_ My thoughts, or Alisa's, or both? But the vision sucked us back in.

"Ok, ready!" I yelled, and then I saw them. They were smiling, looking around. I felt a trickle of warmth at the sight of them, but it was soon replaced by fear. Was I really afraid that they would find me? No, it was something else. Something worse, something primal.

"Here we come…"

They turned and walked towards the wardrobe.

_No, they're gonna find me!_

And yet that thought didn't feel so bad. I wanted them to come here, to hide in the wardrobe with me. But hide from what?

Mom's eyes caught mine, and she smiled. Then she turned and screamed.

Every doubt came crashing down, just like the huge monster that pounced on them. A voice I didn't recognize — no, it was faint, but there was recognition — whispered: _Vajra_. But not a normal Vajra. This one was black with a golden cape fluttering around it as it tore my parents to pieces. Its grey beard became stained to rust with blood.

There went Mommy's arm.

"Daddy!" There went his leg. A sob racked my throat. "Mommy!" Another leg. The scream forced its way through the choking sob. "Stop it! Don't eat them!"

The Vajra growled, its meal finished. Its fearsome red eyes peered at me through the crack in the wardrobe. The fear worsened, became unbearable. Suffocating.

"No!" I screamed, feeling as if my throat might tear. "Stop it!"

White.

"Song!" Mom screamed.

"Song! Where are you?!" My dad yelled.

I watched them from the top of a building. I'd always wanted to climb up there, but my parents had told me not to. Abandoned buildings were dangerous, they said, because of broken glass and other dangerous things. But because I was feeling particularly rebellious after screaming and throwing a fit, I'd decided that I'd finally climb it.

So now I was seated at the very top, swinging my legs as I gazed down at earth.

"Song! Please, answer!"

I took a deep breath and wiped a tear from my cheek.

"I'm up here!" I yelled.

Both my parents looked up.

"Song, please come down from there!" Mom yelled. I gritted my teeth. I'd answered them, wasn't that enough?! Now they wanted to boss me around?!

"No!" I shouted.

I heard my voice echo against the empty buildings, like summons. Summons to what, I didn't know. A feeling of fear came over me. No, I shouldn't be afraid. I was mad. This fear wasn't there before. This was new, a remnant from a future.

Then I heard what sounded like heavy footsteps…heavy, metallic footsteps?

My mother screamed.

Suddenly a giant silver scorpion pounced. I watched as it fell upon them, tearing them to pieces.

White.

It faded. I saw my arm in the machine, fingers barely reaching for the God Arc in front of me, tempted to touch but knowing that that was forbidden. Ahead loomed a monstrosity of metal, and I knew that in that metal lied an armlet, or at least half of one. The other half was beneath my wrist.

"So young…" A sinister voice echoed in the tiny room. "How you must have cursed yourself for being so utterly powerless!"

The machine clamped down.

I gasped at the feeling of intense pressure on my wrist. Pain shot up my arm and I grabbed at it, limited by the machine, hoping that my hand could staunch the pain. I could hear the pathetic sounds I made, desperate sobs in my throat, but despite all that I resisted the urge to tear my arm from the machine.

"If you overcome this anguish, you'll gain the power to avenge your parents' death!"

I screamed, hearing the very pain in my voice.

"That's right! Fight it! Rise above it!"

White.

"Now then, let me welcome you…to humankind's last fortress, Fenrir…"

I was in the same room as before the white-out. A different God Arc sat in front of me. This time I was not eager to touch it. I felt sick just at the thought of it.

"I will now test your compatibility as a member of the Anti-Aragami Punitive Force, the Gods Eaters." Director Schicksal's voice sounded calm and collected, as if he did this on a daily basis. It didn't curb my nervousness. Somehow he must have noticed my discomfort because he said: "Please try to relax a little. You'll get better results that way."

Surely he could see me sweating. He should know how terrified I am.

"Take the God Arc, Song." He said gently.

I nodded. The metal was cold against my sweaty palm.

Immediately, the bracelet clamped down on my wrist. I bit my tongue to keep from screaming. Strength, right? That was what Gods Eater stood for. Strength to protect.

It hurt. It felt like something was devouring my arm. My breath came in ragged gasps. My mouth filled with blood because I was concentrating on not screaming.

The clamp loosened and the pain weakened. I tried my best not to sag against the machine. My knees were weak, but I'd done it.

I'd become a Gods Eater.

White.

Suddenly I was myself again, but I was not out of the vision. As if I was watching a movie, a slightly-foggy sight sat before my eyes.

Alisa was sitting on a bed in a hospital very much like the Far East Branch's. In front of her sat a screen: on it were pictures of the white Vajras and the Aragami that ate Alisa's parents.

"These are your enemies — the Aragami." Doctor Oguruma's voice whispered, as if speaking to a child.

"Ara…gami?!" Alisa's tongue stumbled over the foreign word.

"Right. Scary-as-all-get-out Aragami! And last but not least, here is…"

The screen flashed to Lindow.

Lindow?! Why was he—

My thoughts were interrupted when Dr. Oguruma continued: "…the Aragami that devoured your mommy and daddy!"

_No! That's wrong! Alisa, don't listen to him! Lindow isn't an Aragami!_

She didn't hear me. "Daddy… Mommy…"

"But…you're strong enough to fight now, aren't you?"

I wanted to scream at him. I always trusted Dr. Oguruma. And now I watched him lie to poor Alisa. That…that…son of a bitch!

The curse felt good on my mind, but it didn't stop me from continuing to listen.

Dr. Oguruma placed a hand on Alisa shoulder. "It couldn't be easier. All you have to do is aim at it and pull the trigger."

"Pull the trigger…" She whispered, as if she were in a trance. I supposed that she was.

"Right. And this is what you should say as you pull the trigger: Ajin duva touri!"

"Ajin… duva… touri…" She whispered, as if the words were ambrosia.

"That's right." Oguruma murmured. "That's the chant that will turn you into a strong little girl."

"Ajin… duva… touri…"

* * *

Phew, another chapter! I don't really like how this one ended, but it was getting _way_ too long. Much longer than any other chapters, I think.

Oh well, I'm off to work on the next one! As always, thank you for reading!


	21. XXI

XXI

**Song**

Alisa sat up suddenly. Startled out of my reverie, I withdrew my hand.

We were back in the hospital, with me sitting at her bedside. I rubbed my eyes a little, dazed at what I'd seen.

"What? What was that?" Her startled voice softened when she saw me. "Just now. I felt your emotions flowing into my mind… I…I know it happened to you too."

I nodded.

She looked down sadly, drawing her knees up to her chest. She seemed trapped in what she had just seen.

I took one of the cans from the side table, handing it to her. Alisa looked up, smiling weakly before taking it. I noticed that she avoided touching my fingers. Instead of being insulted, I was relieved. I didn't really want to go through that again. She reached for the tab.

The moment it opened, foamy drink spewed everywhere.

With a startled screech Alisa threw the can, though that didn't stop most of it from soaking her shirt. I got a lot of it on me, too. I desperately signed 'sorry' over and over again, but she didn't so much as glance my way. She wouldn't have been able to understand me, anyway. She just sat there, looking completely stunned.

All of a sudden, she started to laugh.

It was hesitant at first, as if she'd forgotten how to. And then it became stronger, until it was nearly hysterical. I felt a smile tug at my lips, and then I was laughing too.

"I never would have expected that'd you would try to prank me like that, Song!"

I raised my hands in my defense, shaking frantically to say that I didn't. That just made Alisa start laughing again.

"Alright, alright! I believe you!" Her laughter faded to a smile, and then the smile changed back to sadness. "I thought I'd forgotten all about that day…until right now…"

I put my can aside, wanting to reach and comfort her. She continued talking. "You saw. I know that you saw what happened to my parents. And I saw what happened to yours." She closed her eyes, reliving her painful memories. "It's all my fault!"

I couldn't stand that. I grabbed her hand, squeezing until she looked at me. I shook my head sharply.

She laughed, her laugh bitter instead of happy. "If you say that, then you should know it's not your fault either! I know that that's what you believe!"

I tried shaking my head again, but she knew that I was lying.

She chuckled, threading her fingers into mine and looking away. "We both know, somewhere deep deep down that it isn't true, but we can't stop ourselves from thinking it, can we?"

Shakily, I nodded. It was true. It was all too true.

"I guess we'll just have to deal with our guilt however we can." Alisa said. "You hated me. You hated me when I first came here, didn't you?"

No point in denying it.

"It was because…because I was so rude. That's what made you angry at me. I was rude to Kota and to Lindow, even though they were both so kind to me."

I nodded.

"Do you hate me still?"

This time I shook my head. There was no way. She was just…Alisa. That was how she is.

She smiled slightly. "That's what everyone likes about you, Song. You're so forgiving and kind. Sometimes…sometimes I wish I could be like that."

I freed my fingers from hers, standing up to look for a pen and paper. I hadn't brought my notebook simply because I didn't think that she would have woken up, anyway. Dr. Oguruma's desk had a notepad and a pen. I grabbed it, justifying the theft as something minor against the crimes he'd committed. With my loot I returned to my seat.

You can.

Alisa shook her head. "It's too late. I've already been so rude. I killed Lindow, Song! How can anyone forgive me after that?!"

No one blames you!

My haste made my writing messy and darker than usual.

Everyone's worried about you! They don't think it's your fault!

"I can't!" She sobbed. "I can't face them after this!"

I stood up and ran out of the room, hearing her yell my name.

The first room I visited was Soma's. I knocked as hard as I could. From the stomping, he was upset. When he opened the door his frown just deepened. "What do you want?"

I grabbed his arm and pulled. He was so surprised that I managed to get him through the doorway before he reacted.

"What the hell, rookie?! What do you want?!"

Keeping my grip tight, I took two steps and hammered at the door across from his. Halfway through knocking, Sakuya opened it. She must have heard the commotion and was coming to investigate. She looked tired, but that didn't stop the curiosity in his eyes.

She frowned at the two of us, or maybe just at my face. "What is it, Song…and Soma?"

I grabbed her arm too, dragging them both back to the elevator.

"What's gotten into you?!" Soma snarled, thrashing against my grip.

"Now now." Sakuya said gently, seeming to be enjoying herself. "Let's see where this goes."

Soma grumbled something under his breath.

We rode the elevator until we reached the rookie floor. I knocked on Kota's door.

"Coming!" He yelled. He opened the door with a large grin on his face, which quickly turned to confusion. "What exactly is going on here?"

"Rookie's lost it." Soma muttered.

I pulled him from his room after letting go of Sakuya and Soma. Deciding that at this point I had probably gotten them all interested, I gestured for them to follow me.

When we got back to the hospital, Alisa was sitting up on her bed. Her eyes widened when she saw all of us. They seemed equally as surprised to see her.

"You're awake!" Kota shouted. His surprise turned into a huge grin. "I can't believe it! I'm so happy!"

Alisa was speechless. I took that opportunity to grab the notepad, and scrawl on it:

Do you think it's Alisa's fault that Lindow's gone?

I flipped it so that my little crowd could see it.

Kota denied it right off the bat. "Of course not! That was a freak accident! How could you say that?!"

Sakuya's answer was a little more calm. "How could we blame you for that, Alisa? We all could do nothing."

Even Soma shook his head.

See?

My answer was accompanied by a huge grin.

That was when Alisa started to bawl.

* * *

Hello again! ^^

I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I really have no other news to say other than I'm working on the next one. Oh, and look! *points to cover* I made a new one! I like this one a lot better, and I think I'll keep it until the story's finished. I guess I actually do have news, and more of it then! I've decided that I will end this story at the end of the Gods Eater storyline. That doesn't mean I'm going to end Song's adventures right there, though. I believe that I'll be making a sequel. The reason I'm splitting it in two is because there's already 21 chapters and we haven't even met Shio yet! This is the longest fanfiction I've ever written, and I don't feel like it having 100 chapters (yeah, unlikely but you get my point). So I'm deciding to split it up. I'll release a sequel, most likely. And, if by the time I'm done the sequel Gods Eater 2 comes out in the US, maybe I'll have to write a third book and make it a trilogy! :p I just really hope 2 comes out in English, at least.

Well, after that lengthy author's note, I'd just like to thank you all, as always, for reading! I appreciate it so much!


	22. XXII

XXII

**Song**

"This is an urgent request. A Borg Camlann has arrived! This is its first appearance in the Far East in 11 years. Please eliminate it quickly! Your unit will be sent out."

_Eleven years?!_ My heart nearly stopped. Eleven years was the last time a Borg Camlann appeared here. Eleven years ago, a Borg Camlann killed my parents.

"Are you alright?" Hibari asked. She must have noticed how I hadn't reacted after she told me my next mission.

I nodded, trying my best to smile. Why was I worried about this? I was a Gods Eater now. Not some helpless 7-year-old who could only sit and watch her parents die.

"Alright." It didn't sound like she believed me, but she continued on anyway. "Sakuya, unfortunately, will not be accompanying you on this mission. Tsubaki has ordered that she take a break."

A break?

I thought that Hibari was excellent at reading faces, because she instantly answered in response to my confusion. "Lately, Sakuya has been pushing herself much too hard. She's been secretly taking extra missions. I reported this to Tsubaki, mostly because I was getting worried. Tsubaki agreed that she needed a break, so she ordered her to." Hibari smiled gently. "She's been hiding it really well, Song. Don't feel guilty that you didn't notice."

I was too distressed to be creeped out by mind-reader Hibari. I'd thought that Sakuya was perfectly fine. Sure, she'd been angry at the judgement made on Lindow's status, but… I hadn't thought that it was this bad.

"That leaves 3 active members in your unit." Hibari said, all business again. "You, Soma, and Kota. You may choose a member of another unit to accompany you if you so desire. I recommend trying to fill in the gap in your team left by Sakuya."

Alright, I would deal with Sakuya later. After this mission, I was going to go visit her and make sure she was okay. Sounds like a plan.

But for now I needed to keep my attention focused on the mission.

"I'll call Soma and Kota here. It's better if you make this decision as a team. Besides, with it being an urgent request it is important that it is done quickly."

I signed thank you to her, which made her smile. Even though she didn't know sign language, the blow-kiss motion was distinctive enough to get the point across.

As she spoke into the intercom, I took the opportunity to refill all my healing items at the shop, and took a quick peek into the archives for information on this Borg Camlann's weaknesses. All I found was a grainy photograph and a paragraph that said: "Due to the lack of appearances of this Aragami in our area information is limited. Its last appearance was on May 18, 2058, so accurate information cannot be gathered due to the ever-evolving nature of the Aragami."

I cursed to myself. So basically we were going into the fight blind. That seemed to happen often, unfortunately. Best to grab an element-less weapon.

Kota was the first to arrive in the lobby. He skipped straight up to Hibari, as if not even worried about an urgent mission. If anything, that would just excite him more.

Soma's entrance was the polar opposite of Kota's. He walked in with hunched shoulders, and some of the rookies flinched under his glare. It very nearly made me laugh, but then I remembered what it had been like to be on the receiving end of that glare. That made me sober up quickly.

I walked over to them before they could start fighting with each other.

"…so you'll want to choose a member to fill in the last slot of your team." Hibari finished explaining.

"Sakuya's our medic." Kota pointed out. "We definitely need a medic."

I felt like that sly, mocking glance was aimed at me.

How about Kanon?

Both Kota and Soma turned to me with incredulous looks.

-What?- I signed.

"Kanon has an excellent hit rate." Kota said slowly, as if to make sure that I heard and understood every word. "Except she only hits her _teammates_. And not with healing shots!"

"She'll knock you out of the way with her radial shots. Especially when you're devouring." Soma added.

I shook my head. Okay, no Kanon I guess.

"Let's bring Gina!" Kota suddenly yelled. "There's no other medics, and Sakuya uses laser shots! So does Gina!"

"Sounds reasonable. We don't need another melee, anyway."

Wait, did Soma actually _agree_ with Kota?!

Twice?!

Kota seemed to notice it too. He narrowed his eyes. "Man, you're awfully agreeable today."

Soma glared at him, but said nothing. Instead, he turned to me. "Are you ready?"

I nodded. I wasn't exactly lying. I was as ready as I ever would be, facing down the Aragami that murdered my parents without the support of a medic, which—as Alisa had pointed out before—I desperately needed. Good thing I'd bought recovery items.

X

"Don't be too aggressive." Soma growled. "If I have to pick you up one more time, I'll just leave you there."

I nodded, my head hung low. A moment later I raised my head, mostly to barely avoid being speared by the Borg Camlann's needle.

I just couldn't concentrate. Whenever I'd go in for a hit, the Camlann would twirl, knocking my feet out from under me with its metal tail. Each time it got harder and harder to stand. My ankles were shaking from the impacts and from holding up my weight.

We were all having trouble, but I was by far in the worst condition. Every time I stood I was knocked back down. I'd used up all my recovery items. This was the third time I'd been incapacitated. Each time, Soma had been the first to pull me to my feet.

The heat of the Infernal Subway made my nervous sweat even worse. My shaky hands made my grip on my God Arc perilous at best—I'd dropped it a couple of times—and my throat hurt. The Borg Camlann shook the earth with every step, but I was pretty sure that my shaking was still caused by fear.

I was terrified.

"Retreat!" Soma suddenly yelled.

"What?!" Gina snarled. She was a reckless sniper, but she was getting good hits.

"Our attacks are doing nothing!" Soma answered just as vehemently. "We're just tiring ourselves out! Fall back and we'll come up with a strategy!"

_This isn't very Soma-like_, I had time to think before he grabbed me by the hood and tugged until I was forced to stumble after him.

The Borg Camlann roared, making me flinch. I could feel the thud of its footsteps against the pavement. It was following us. It had to be.

_Don't panic. _I repeated it to myself over and over. I had managed to flip myself over, tearing my hood from Soma's grip. Instead, he just grabbed my arm, just above the elbow, and kept pulling. _Don't panic_. Is this what my parents felt like, trying to run as the Borg Camlann chased them down? _Don't panic!_

"Don't panic." Soma somehow voiced my thoughts.

"I'll push it back !" Kota shouted. A moment later I heard the familiar burst of his bullets, along with the enraged cry of the Borg Camlann.

_Don't panic, don't panic!_

Soma pulled me into one of the many small corridors branching off from the main subway. Gina and Kota's footsteps soon followed, and the ground no longer shook from the Borg Camlann's tread.

"We should be good here." Soma said, finally letting go of my arm. He sat on a ledge, fixing me with his glare. Gina and Kota skidded to a stop at my side. I tried my best not to burst into tears. I was successful for the most part.

"What's the meaning of this?" Gina hissed. "We almost had it!"

"No, we didn't." Soma snapped back. "We weren't even denting its armour. We rushed into the fight without thinking. If we just spend a moment now to come up with a strategy, we'll finish this a lot quicker."

Gina and Soma continued to argue. I stopped paying attention, trying to stop myself from shaking. We were out of danger, for the moment. There was no need for me to be so worried. No need for me to cry.

"Song, are you okay?" Kota asked.

I turned to him, trying my best to nod and smile. He didn't seem convinced.

"Of course you're not alright. You're fighting against the Aragami that killed your parents." Kota shuffled his feet nervously. "Look, I know it's hard, but…"—he suddenly looked up, clenching his fists in front of him with a huge grin on his face—"you have to be strong! If you can stop this Borg Camlann right here, then you can stop it from hurting someone else's parents! This is what Gods Eaters are about, right? Protecting others?!"

I nodded shakily. He was right, of course. Kota might seem to be an idiot, but he had an uncanny knack for hitting the nail on the head.

"So that's why we have to try our best! If you get over your fear, then you can save others from the same fear!"

This time my nod was steadier. Kota was right. I became a Gods Eater to protect people, right? I told myself time and time again that to protect others I have to overcome my fear. This is just another example of that.

"Pay attention, rookies." Soma's voice cut off whatever Kota was going to say next. "This is our plan. We'll concentrate on attacking its head. Try your best to always hit the same spot. Once we manage to chink its armour, Gina will shoot and hopefully kill it."

"You guys better pull through." Gina warned.

"Count on it!" Kota answered enthusiastically.

* * *

What?! Two chapters in two days?! What is this madness?!

This "madness" is a sudden burst of exploration and finally reaching a spot I was eager to write. I love the psychological struggle of characters with themselves, so I'm especially excited for this chapter and the next.

Alright, no time to talk! Time to work on the next chapter! As always, thank you for reading! Your support means the world to me~!


	23. XXIII

XXIII

**Soma**

I hammered tirelessly on the Borg Camlann's skull.

My hits were few and far between — using a Buster Blade, with its huge strokes, guaranteed that. But with each hit I could feel the metal hull of the Aragami's hide crumble just the slightest. Gina would fire a shot immediately after, with ace precision. Kota's bullets would follow. And Song…

She'd stumble to her feet after falling for the umpteenth time, swallow another health pill — I think Kota must have given her some when we'd gathered together, because last time I'd checked she'd had none — only to get knocked down again. The difficulty she was having was in part due to the fact that the Borg Camlann was focusing on her. Aragami seem to have a sort of instinct that can tell them exactly who's weakest or most vulnerable — at the moment, it seemed that Song was it.

I wanted to order her back, but I had a feeling that she wouldn't listen. Every time she would stand up with that same stupid look on her face, a mixture of determination and fear. I understood why she was having trouble. It wasn't every day that you face a monster that killed your parents and aided in rendering you mute.

Besides, she was distracting the Borg Camlann and giving me time to ready my own attacks.

I swung and shattered the Aragami's armour. A small hole appeared, giving me a glance at pink flesh. It figured that the Borg Camlann was like a snail.

"I'm out of bullets!" Gina suddenly yelled.

I cursed under my breath, leaping back to avoid its needle. Perfect. Just when I'd managed to do something our plan fell apart.

Kota tried uselessly to fire his own bullets, but they were too large to hit the Camlann's insides with full effectiveness. Still, it would do some damage while Gina recovered her Oracle Points.

The question now, however, was would we be able to last that long?

Everyone was in horrible shape. Song had taken the most damage, but Gina and Kota still looked tired. I could feel my own tiredness, weighing me down and making my God Arc heavier than it should be. We needed to do something, and fast.

That was when Song came out of nowhere.

I didn't even fully understand that she was there until she was leaping up in front of the Borg Camlann, blade raised far above her head. She looked crazy: her body bruised and bleeding at places (small damages that meant she was out of health pills again), teeth gritted from pain or anger, and a fierce, almost crazed look in her eye. It wasn't until she'd plunged her tiny sword into the hole in the Aragami's head that I understood what she was trying to do.

The Borg Camlann screamed, the hit exploding in a brilliant flash of red-white. It reared but Song held on, finding purchase on its slick metal skin by placing a steady foot against one of the many spikes lining its skull. She leaned harder on her God Arc with an audible squelch. This time when the Aragami shook its head her grip slipped. She fell hard to the ground, bringing her God Arc with her.

The Borg Camlann screeched one more time before its legs started to twitch. It fell to the ground, spewing dust everywhere. For a moment is continued to spasm, but then it went still, curling it legs together much in the way of a dead spider.

Song sat up, coughing violently, probably due to the dust. She wasn't spitting up blood or anything, so I assumed that she was fine.

"Wow…" Kota wolf-whistled, then screamed enthusiastically: "That was _awesome_!"

Song smiled shakily, possibly still trying to catch her breath.

"Finally." Gina muttered. "Can we go back now?"

X

**Song**

I scribbled furiously on my notepad, trying to get every detail down. Sakuya waited patiently, though I could tell that she was curious as to what I was writing.

After that semi-disastrous mission, I'd rushed over to go visit Sakuya. She'd taken one look at my face before boiling water for tea and steering me to a seat on the couch.

I finished writing, handing her the notepad before reaching for my cup. Tea was wonderful. The warm water seemed to ease the stress from my body. It was almost cleansing, though I was sure that the feeling was purely psychological. Somehow I doubted that drinking tea would wipe the dirt from my face and clothes.

"I see." Sakuya finally said after I'd finished my tea and helped myself to another cup. "Alisa's… Thanks for letting me know. But really, to think that you could communicate just by touching…" Her voice was full of awe. "I wonder if that's a power all you New-Types share."

I shrugged. There was no way to know. Alisa and I were the only New-Types in this branch, and I didn't feel like asking the director to contact another branch to ask. It just felt…personal, almost. I'd told Sakuya, but it still felt like something that only a few needed to know. I still shuddered to think of what I'd seen in Alisa's mind.

Sakuya fixed me with a stare. "Please, stay by her side for a while, will you?"

She didn't need to say that. I nodded. After that little past-sharing moment, I doubted that I could stay away. It was too intimate for me to just turn my back after that.

Sakuya smiled, though it quickly turned sad. She looked away, almost as if she was trying to hide it.

-Are you okay?- I signed to her.

Even though she'd turned her head, she noticed my hands fluttering. When I was sure I had her full attention, I repeated my question.

She smiled, though it did not lose its bitter tone. "Perfectly fine."

-You're lying.- I answered, frowning.

A look of surprise flitted across her face before she settled for that fake smile, although this time it seemed to have a tiny bit of real warmth behind it. "My leader, who's been my rock for many years, has disappeared without any effort put towards finding him. Another one of my teammates is in the hospital due to a mental breakdown. I haven't slept in days. But,"—this time her smile was completely genuine—"I will be okay. Eventually. We all will."

* * *

Whoo, I'm on a writing roll! XD Haha. I don't think I've ever worked so quickly on this. I've actually written quite a few more chapters, but I have decided to simply build up a buffer in case of holidays or periods of inactivity. I think I've been averaging at 3 chapters a day for the last few days? Yeah, they're pretty short chapters, but I think I've run into the exact opposite of writer's block. X3

Alright, til next time! I'm hoping that I can reward your guys' patience with a burst of new chapters and activity. So thank you all for reading!


	24. XXIV

XXIV

**Song**

"That was awesome, wasn't it?" Kota exclaimed the moments the credits rolled.

I nodded, but my heart wasn't in it.

Kota had a crazy love for Bugarally. He'd invite me over for marathons — I didn't really enjoy the show, but the company was nice.

"It was…interesting." Alisa answered.

"Really?!" Kota nearly screamed out of joy. "You liked it?"

"I never said I liked it." Alisa's scowl was somewhat less effective with her slightly red face. "I just said that it was interesting."

"Okay, sorry." Kota tried not to pout. Instead, he took another sip of his juice.

We were all gathered in his room, watching Bugarally. Inviting Alisa was my idea. At first it was only supposed to be a night for Kota and I, but I thought that maybe Alisa would appreciate the company, especially because she was dispatched from the hospital. Besides, she wanted to become friends with everyone, right? Kota was a good start. He probably already considered her a friend, anyway. It was just a matter of getting _her_ to consider him a friend.

Alisa got a somewhat conflicted expression on her face, as if she couldn't quite decide what to do. Finally, she hesitantly said: "I did like the costumes, though."

Kota very nearly exploded. "Really?! I know, they're pretty great! Hey, I have a Kamira action figure! She has an awesome costume and you can change her outfit and I think I have it with me, let me find it!"

With that he leapt off the couch and started rifling through his drawers. Alisa gave me an embarrassed look, which I answered with a thumbs up. Her shaky smile told me that she would be okay.

"Here it is!" He rushed back to the couch, proudly showing off the tiny figure he held in his hands, along with a bag of what looked like clothing. "It has all her outfits from Season 3! I think I lost the bag with Season 1 clothes and I haven't gotten Season 2 ones yet!"

Alisa actually seemed…genuinely interested. She carefully took the figure from Kota's hands, along with the bag of clothes.

"This…" She said slowly, pulling at the tiny Kamira's sleeve.

"It's great, isn't it?" Kota interrupted, still bubbly from finding something she liked. "Oh, I forgot about Season 4! I think I have it somewhere!"

I clapped my hands before he moved. He looked at me, confused, until I started signing. –I think I'm gonna head to bed.-

"Alright, Song." Kota grinned. "Good night!"

As Kota once again turned back to his cupboard, Alisa shot me a panicked look. I grinned and left the room.

X

**Soma**

"As of today, I'll be returning to your unit. Once again, I look forward to working with you." Alisa stuttered awkwardly, hovering by the table.

"Great!" Kota yelled immediately. He patted the seat behind him. "Now sit down, eat!"

Alisa seemed a little surprised, but actually sat down.

"When are you resuming actual combat?" Kota asked eagerly, as if that was an appropriate thing to ask to someone who was obviously feeling down. I rolled my eyes, taking a bite out of breakfast.

It _had_ been a peaceful morning until Song and Kota showed up. For some stupid reason they thought it was acceptable to just come and sit at my table, no questions asked. Before I'd had a chance to chase them away, Sakuya had shown up and joined them. At that point I knew that it would be pointless to tell them to go away, so I'd saved myself the effort. That hadn't stopped me from making my displeasure known, of course. The non-committal grunts to their conversations made sure of that.

"That…hasn't been decided yet," slowly answered Alisa. She kept her gaze focused on the table in front of her, as if her food was the most interesting thing in the world.

"I see…" For once Kota seemed to read the atmosphere, sounding a lot more subdued than usual. Or maybe he was just disappointed that there would be one less lady to fawn over during battle.

"Hey, did you hear? One of the New-Types…she's been reinstated!" A loudmouth sitting behind me muttered. He made no attempt to be quiet, so naturally his voice caught my attention. From the way Song looked up and behind me, she'd heard him too.

Loudmouth #2 added: "Yeah, the little wretch who trapped Lindow with a new type Vajra and left him for dead!"

Song frowned.

"By the way, after all those airs she put on, she can't go into combat anymore, I hear."

The other one laughed. "Jeez, so she was all bark and no bite!"

Song stood up abruptly. The scrape of her chair echoed, making the two loudmouths look up. She turned towards them, towering over them — which was quite effective, considering they were sitting and that she was taller than I was —and glaring.

They stared right back. One of them looked like he was about to say something, so I stood up too. At that they lost their nerve, quietly turning back to their tables, picking up their trays, and hastily leaving. The room gradually went back to its noisy self as Song and I sat down. She gave me a grin, which only Kota returned.

Alisa looked at us both, awe clearly on her face. She looked like she was about to say something, but hesitated. The same look came across her face and she blurted out: "Could you please teach me the proper way to fight again?"

Song nodded vigorously, probably before she'd had a chance to even think about what the hell that was supposed to mean.

"What do you mean by that?" I growled, because no one else was about to. Both Sakuya and Kota had nodded just as enthusiastically as Song, although I was pretty sure Sakuya was still on leave.

Alisa gave me a desperate look. "Just…teach me."

I sighed. I guess there would be no straight answer from her. Teaching was pretty straightforward, at least.

"Please, Soma!" She cried. "I want to protect someone dear to me… This time of my own free will!"

Song turned to me, giving her best imitation of puppy dog eyes. I scowled at her, but she didn't flinch. I vaguely yearned for the days when she used to be afraid of me.

"Fine." I growled.

I turned away from Song's grin.

* * *

Oh Soma, you can't keep up that tsundere attitude forever. .3.

Hehe, as always, thanks for reading!


	25. XXV

XXV

**Song**

"The Tyrant Breath mission?" Hibari asked.

Alisa nodded assuredly, despite the tiny shake in her hands.

Hibari hesitated, raising an eyebrow. "Are you sure about this, Alisa? You're not supposed to go back into actual combat yet. The superiors may have cleared this, but they don't know you. All they see is a Gods Eater who's out of the hospital. Are _you_ ready for this, Alisa?"

Alisa bit her bottom lip. She glanced at me from the corner of her eye. I took out my notepad.

She'll be fine. She's with us.

I showed Hibari the book, and she nodded. "Alright. Just be careful." She aimed that at Alisa, but the next part was meant for all of us. "You are to take down a Chi-You in the Wailing Plains. I assume that all of you will be going on this mission?"

We all nodded, Kota quite eagerly while Soma seemed less than happy.

"Alright." Hibari sighed. "Good luck, and be careful."

X

I wanted to yell tips to Alisa, but I couldn't.

It wasn't that she was doing bad — rather, she was doing nothing. Once and awhile she would fire off a recovery bullet, but that was it. She ignored the Chi-You completely, instead focusing on keeping everyone else alive.

I gritted my teeth but said nothing. It wasn't fair for me to be angry at her. She was relearning how to fight, after all. She'd been the hospital for a long time due to trauma — I couldn't exactly expect her to just jump back into the fight like this.

Kota took a hit, but Alisa healed him immediately so I wasn't concerned. I took a deep breath and continued to fight.

X

"I think," Alisa said, gasping for air, "that I'm getting the hang of this again."

I slumped down beside her, panting just like she was. The Borg Camlann's body gave one more twitch before it finally stilled.

"How do you do it?" She murmured. "That's the Aragami that killed your parents, right? How did you fight against it so easily?"

I signalled "before".

She seemed impressed. "You've fought it before?"

I nodded, holding up one finger.

"Only once." Awe was evident in her voice. "You battled it only once, and you still did so well?"

I shrugged, my eyes on the sunset. Alisa was wrong. It hadn't been easy. Sure, much easier than the first time, but I still felt my heart stop when a needle crashed down and still trembled every time it charged. She was overestimating me.

That seemed to push her deep into thought. I faintly heard Kota and Soma arguing about something, Kota shrill voice an interesting contrast to Soma's deep murmurs. I didn't know what they were arguing about, but I decided to ignore it in favour of sitting here and catching my breath.

"You're amazing." Alisa said, her voice barely raised above a whisper. "You watched your parents die right before your eyes, just like I did, but you weren't even damaged."

I mutely pointed to my throat, watching a flush rise to her cheeks.

"Sorry." She desperately tried to fix what she was saying. "It's just…you were able to face the Borg Camlann again. You killed it, too! But I…I saw the Vajra and lost it."

There was no way I could answer her in sign. I took out my notebook and quickly jotted down:

That's different! You were taken advantage of – nothing like that happened to me. I only lost my voice. You had a doctor that used your illness to manipulate you.

She still looked sad, despite the truth of my words. Desperation brought tears to her eyes.

"I wish I was stronger! I wish I could overcome this!"

You can!

I wrote furiously, but I didn't have a chance to show it to her before she spoke again.

"Every day I feel weaker." She murmured brokenly.

We'll get through this.

This time I managed to show her.

"No…" Alisa whispered. Her voice grew stronger suddenly, and she shook her head. "No! This is something I have to overcome on my own. I…I know you're just trying to help me, Song, and I appreciate it. But there's only so much you can do — you can scribble all the encouraging notes you want, but I'm the only one who can change myself."

She took a deep breath before continuing. A shaky smiled formed on her face.

"I need to do this myself. My problem is with myself, and only I can fix it."

X

**Soma**

"Time to go." I growled.

Song jumped to her feet, whirling towards me before relaxing. I must have startled her. Alisa turned her face away quickly, but not before I got a chance to see the tear stains on her cheeks, but she was smiling at least. Song, on the other hand, seemed confused.

For a second she seemed…sad. The expression was disconcerting on her face, especially next to Alisa's tentative smile.

"Let's get going before more Aragami show up. You've spent enough time gazing into the sunset." I told them before turning around.

I heard Alisa get to her feet, seeing a whirl of orange as Kota headed towards her. He'd been arguing with me about giving those two more time. I wasn't sure why, exactly. Couldn't they have their little gabfest at the Den, where there were no Aragami — or at least less of them — to interrupt?

When I turned to make sure they were following, I saw Kota talking animatedly to Alisa at the back of the pack, with Song trailing behind me. She seemed deep in thought.

Before I'd even had a chance to think, I said: "You did good today."

She looked up, startled once again.

What the hell was I thinking?! Why would I say something like that?! I'd seen her struggle with the Camlann again. It wasn't nearly as intense as the first time she'd faced it, but it was still enough to be noticeable, to me at least. She hadn't done particularly well — she just hadn't done horribly like last time.

She smiled at that.

I turned around before I could do anything more stupid.

X

**Song**

Safe in my room, I let myself fall into a torrent of emotions.

I poured myself a glass of juice first, watching the red liquid churn over itself and vaguely wishing that I could drown in it. I sat myself down on the bed, draining the glass in one go. Then I fell onto my back and stared at the ceiling.

It was stupid. I'd never felt particularly strong here, but I'd never felt completely weak either. Somehow all the praise that'd been showered down upon me — either from something I did on the mission or from being a New-Type — had given me the impression that I didn't need to fix my problems. The hero worship from Kota and Alisa and the occasional semi-reluctant praise from Soma had given me the impression that I was fine just the way I was. Besides, if I had problems I could just let them fix them, right?

Alisa's words, the ones that had caused this inner turmoil in the first place, came to mind once more.

"_I need to do this myself. My problem is with myself, and only I can fix it."_

And even then there had been some hero worship before it. She'd said I had no problems — but I was mute, rendered mute because of a thing in my past. My instant response was to say that I did have a problem.

With a start, I realized just how telling my immediate answer had been.

Before I'd come here, I would have never seen my muteness as a problem. It was a protection for those around me. Hell, I'd never even considered it mutism. I'd always seen it as a minor, but necessary convenience, not a disorder.

But now I'd gotten to thinking that it would be great if I could speak again. Alisa was talking about overcoming her own weakness, her disorder. And in that moment I'd been _jealous_. Jealous that she was able to identify herself as the problem, and jealous that she was so willing to fix it.

Could I speak again?

Instantly the fear came back. I couldn't speak. They'd die. That was what my voice did — it killed people. My words were death to any who heard them. And yet, during the last few days, I'd hated how I couldn't speak to Alisa, couldn't give her help when she needed it the most.

I curled up into a ball, burying my face into my knees. I closed my eyes, hoping the darkness could clear my thoughts.

_But Soma didn't die._

My breath hitched. No, he didn't. The Gboro-Gboro hadn't killed him. I'd left it at that, gone on with my life without thinking of it again. Why wasn't I worried about him every mission since? Why was it that only that one time I'd feared for his life? Sure, I was always worried about him and the others. But when I'd been expecting him to die, the fear had been present and suffocating; I'd thought his life was balanced on a blade's edge.

Why wasn't I afraid anymore? Every other time the person's death had been instant, but I'd entertained the possibility that Soma's death would come later. I'd thought that a hundred times. And yet I wasn't worried anymore, not like how I'd been on the Gboro mission.

I abruptly sat up. Tentatively, I opened my mouth. No sound came. I tried again, before realizing that the problem was myself. This time when I tried the fear hit me as hard as I'd ever felt.

_This is stupid!_ I threw myself back onto the bed, curling under the covers and pressing my palms to my eyes to stop the tears. _Why would you try to speak, idiot? Do you want someone to die?_

But still, the uneasy feeling crept into the back of my mind as I fell asleep.

* * *

DUN DUN DUN. Inner turmoil established, potential character growth on the horizon. Will Song be able to overcome her fears? Or will the overwhelming burdens of a life spent fighting gods never give her the chance? Find out in the next instalment of Learning to Speak!

Hehe, silliness aside, thank you all so much for reading! Your continued support makes me not want to give up when the going gets tough - and, thanks to you guys, I didn't give up when writer's block hit. And look at me now! This will sound cliche, but it's all thanks to you guys!

Alright, til next time! ^^


	26. XXVI

XXVI

**Song**

"That's all from me." Tsubaki stated. "Any questions?"

I shook my head. The elevator doors were just there behind the white-clad woman. I wanted nothing more than to jump out of them, kill this stupid Vajra, then retreat back to my room where I could once again stew with myself over my voice.

On second thought, maybe I really did need to go on this mission.

Alisa kept her gaze directed at the floor, clutching the clipboard in her hand nervously. She stood beside Tsubaki as if she didn't want to be there. I could understand the feeling. Tsubaki could be a little bossy and overbearing, something Alisa probably learned while working as her temporary assistant.

Kota hesitantly raised his hand. "Um…I wish you'd send Alisa on this mission…"

Tsubaki raised an eyebrow. The same expression came across Sakuya's face.

"I mean, see," Kota stammered, obviously under pressure thanks to the twin stares, "she's been, um…she's been working really hard!"

"You too…" Tsubaki sighed. She turned to Sakuya, who returned her gaze. "What do you think?"

I saw the tension in Alisa's shoulders as Sakuya thought about it. Alisa really wanted to go on this mission.

Sakuya looked down at the ground. I could practically hear the gears turning in her head.

Suddenly I was aware that I wanted Alisa to go on this mission too. It was her validation. She _had_ worked hard. She'd dedicated herself to getting stronger; she's swallowed her fear and was ready to face it head on.

She needed this.

Sakuya looked up again. I saw Alisa take a deep breath, anticipation and fear clear on her face.

"I agree." Sakuya said.

Alisa breathed out in relief.

Tsubaki's emotionless face didn't falter. She turned to Alisa, voice slightly intimidating. "However, your target for this mission…is the same type as "that one"… Will you be all right?"

Alisa took a deep breath again. I saw her chew her lip a little.

"I'll go…" She turned to Tsubaki, and I knew that her eyes were begging her. "Please, let me go!"

Tsubaki gave her a searching stare, but Alisa did not falter.

Finally, Tsubaki said: "Very well. But don't overdo it.

"Yay!" Kota exclaimed. "I'll be with you, so you'll be fine! Right?"

Alisa allowed the tiniest smile.

X

I tried to quell my nervousness.

I'd faced a Vajra before — sure, I'd almost died when it had knocked me down and pinned me to the ground. But Soma and Kota rescued me from that. Soma wasn't on this mission, but Kota was, and I'm sure I could rely on Alisa.

The nervousness was still there, however, no matter reassurances I tried.

Still deep in my thought, I turned the corner and almost died.

I threw myself to the ground and the Vajra sailed over my head. The ground rumbled as it landed and I wasted no time stumbling to my feet. There was the shuffling of giant paws as the Vajra quickly turned, and I rolled away as it charged towards me.

A burst of colourful bullets crashed into the Vajra's flank. It whirled towards Kota, and I took that opportunity to slash at its hind legs. Alisa came flying towards me, propelled by the momentum of her Long Blade. A moment later she was back at its face, delivering heavy blows. She looked as nervous as I was, but continued to fight.

The adrenalin of a brush with death made my heart jittery. I jumped, slashing fiercely at the Vajra's ropey tail. It turned and I let myself fall, blade first. I scratched its face and pierced its front paw before safely landing on my feet. With the extra momentum I propelled myself away, covering my eyes from the sudden burst of bright blue electricity.

The adrenalin turned to giddiness as I realized my success in avoiding the attack that had stunned me before. I charged back into the fight. With each slash the giddiness turned to a thrill, a desire to see the Vajra dead. It was that feeling again, which had eluded me since Lindow's disappearance. I suddenly felt powerful and hungry. Each slash satisfied some primal urge in me. Perhaps it was the Aragami in me — the Bias Factor or the Oracle Cells on my blade — but the feeling was too satisfying for me to care.

Before I knew it the Vajra fell, breathing heavily. I tried to attack it once more, but it charged away.

"Don't let it get away!" Kota yelled. "We're going after it!"

"It'll come after us if we stay together like this! Disperse for now! Everyone, watch your back!" Sakuya commanded.

I nodded, watching as Kota and Sakuya headed off. Alisa hesitated. She was pale and looked scared. I signalled for her to follow me, and she gave me the most grateful of smiles.

We reached the outside corner of the cathedral. I raised my hand, signalling Alisa to stay back. She nodded, though she seemed a lot more scared that I expected her to be. I tried to reassure her with a smile before creeping around the corner.

The coast was clear: the ledge behind me was empty, and the one at the far end of the little area was also clear. The gaping hole in the building behind it was intimidating, but I saw no movement.

Still, my steps were careful as I moved forward, mostly because the back area of the church was out of my vision. A quick check revealed it to be empty. I continued on, reaching the opposite corner with incident. I peered around it. Coast clear.

When I turned to signal Alisa forward, I saw her sitting on the ground, gun at the ready, looking terrified.

I wondered what she was doing. I started to walk towards her when a huge shadow fell over me.

Alisa jumped to her feet, screaming, "Out of the way!"

She fired a bullet. I ducked and rolled, watching it spiral before it impaled itself into the Vajra that would have crushed me.

The Aragami fell, unmoving. The full reality of it finally settled in; I'd almost died. The adrenalin made my breath come in ragged gasps and my heart race.

Alisa sobbed before falling to her knees, burying her face in her hands.

I was too stunned to move. That close. It had been that close. The claw of the Vajra was barely a foot from my knee. My roll wouldn't have been enough to save me; Alisa's bullet must have stopped it in midair.

_That close._

Sakuya came running around the corner, relaxing when she saw the Vajra's body.

Alisa was full on crying now. Kota, recently arrived, hesitantly walked towards her. Then, as if he had suddenly made up his mind, he dropped to his knees in front of her and enveloped her in a hug.

I concentrated on steadying my heart. It was fine. A close call, but fine. Unfortunately, there were no Aragami to take out my frustration on, like every other time I'd had a brush with death.

I stared at my shaking hands. Saved by someone else, once again. When would I stop having to rely on others? When would I be able to do everything on my own?

I clenched my fists to stop the shaking. No. From now on, I would be the one to protect everyone. I would be the strong one.

* * *

Oh, Song. How many times have you said that? :p

Anyway, thank you so much for reading! ^^ Till next time!


	27. XXVII

XXVII

**Song**

"Hey, I came because they called this meeting all of a sudden. What's going on?" Kota turned to me, then to Alisa. Neither of us replied. We both had no idea.

I stood and waited. Behind me was the remnant of a soda I'd been in the process of finishing as I sat on the couch in the lounge. Alisa had been sitting with me when the announcement came for the 1st Unit to gather. Kota had come running, followed by Sakuya, and then after came Soma. Now he was sitting in the spot I had been in, hood pulled low, as I stood and waited for whatever was coming.

"I really don't know." Alisa replied, snobbiness in her tone. She'd been like that around Kota ever since the Vajra mission — apparently she didn't appreciate being hugged by him, even though she'd hugged him back at the time. "And even if I did know, I certainly wouldn't tell you. Sakuya, do you know anything about this?"

Alisa turned to Sakuya while Kota turned to me. He looked confused. I simply shrugged. I didn't really know what had gotten into her, either. My shrug brought a miserable expression to Kota's face.

-And I thought we were getting along!- He signed to me.

-Give her time, I guess.- I answered back.

"No, I haven't heard anything." Sakuya was saying. I was surprised. As Sub-Leader, and current temporary leader, I would have expected her to know something, at least. "Still, it's pretty unusual for us all to be summoned."

Tsubaki suddenly appeared, high heels clattering as she came to stand in front of us. Soma finally stood, though he still lurked behind the line.

"I see you're all here." She announced before launching straight to business. "Administration officially announced a new appointment today."

Kota and I exchanged a glance. A new appointment? The only thing I could think of that had to with the 1st Unit was a leadership role. Surely it would be Sakuya to be elected to that position. That was the only logical conclusion.

Tsubaki cleared her throat to get our attention, and I realized that we'd all been looking at each other instead of listening. She didn't seem bothered in the least at our attention.

Suddenly she turned to me, fixing me with her stare. A feeling of dread came over me.

"When the current mission has been cleared, Song Minami will be appointed captain of the 1st Unit, Preservation Bureau, Fenrir Far East Branch."

Song Minami?

With a jolt I realized that that was my name. But, just to be sure, I pointed a finger at my chest.

Tsubaki did not seem amused at all. "Yes, you. From now on, you're the leader of this unit. I'm counting on you."

My veins felt like they were filled with ice. There was no way this could be true. Surely there was a better choice than me.

I tried not to succumb to panic. There was no need to burst out in denial right here. I didn't want my friends to be disappointed in me. After this mission, I would go talk to Tsubaki privately and resolve this.

That reassurance finally let myself relax.

"Whoah! You got promoted!" Kota yelled. His eyes widened suddenly. "And it's a huge promotion! What do they call this kind of thing? Supplanting one's superior?"

Alisa sighed. "Actually, that's a kind of betrayal." She turned to me, and I was surprised at the warmth in her eyes after such coldness to Kota. "Once again… I'm looking forward to working with you. Isn't that right, Sakuya?"

I wondered at Alisa's sudden need to fly everything by Sakuya. Was that her trying to be kind? Because she wasn't being kind to Kota at all.

Sakuya didn't answer until Alisa said: "Sakuya?"

She was startled out of whatever she was thinking about. "Huh? Oh yes…right." She turned to me with a smile, although that couldn't hide the sadness in her eyes. "Leader, huh? Somehow you seem a lot more dependable now! Well then… I know you'll have my back… I'm looking forward to working with you!"

She laughed when I squirmed under all their praises. Soma said nothing, as usual. I found myself missing the praise from him. When had I started to expect him to compliment me? He definitely wasn't the type to dole out praise.

"Don't get ahead of yourself. You won't be officially appointed until after you've completed this mission." Tsubaki interrupted my thoughts. "It's true that a leader is bestowed with certain powers befitting their position. But the responsibilities she must shoulder are of equal weight."

I could almost feel that weight pressing down on me. This was serious. Sure, there was an escape, but for this one mission I was a leader. It was a powerful and terrifying feeling.

"Not just in her capacity as a Gods Eater…" Tsubaki continued. "She's also charged with making sure her team members return safely. Don't die. You must all come back here alive. That's an order."

The allusion to Lindow weighed down on my heart. I could see it in everyone else's faces and in their downward gazes.

"Now then! Stop daydreaming!" Tsubaki's loud voice cut through the gloomy atmosphere as easily as a hot knife through butter. "Go fulfill your mission!"

With that she stormed off.

"What now, O fearless leader?" Kota asked jokingly.

Everyone looked at me expectantly. I sat down across from Soma, trying not to fumble as I took my notepad and pencil from my bag.

First we need to decide who to bring.

I wrote.

There are five of us but only four can go a mission.

It probably wasn't the most spectacular first announcement ever made, but it would do.

As leader and sub-leader, Sakuya and I are guaranteed to go. Out of you three, who wants to go the most?

"I'll go." Soma said immediately, surprising me. I tried to hide my surprise behind a nod, but from the slight frown on his face he must have noticed it anyway.

"Well, uh…" Kota murmured, turning to Alisa. "I guess that leaves us two."

"So it does." Alisa answered coldly.

For once in his life, Kota acted demurely. He clasped his hands together then unclasped them, opening his mouth then closed it. His gaze was fixed on the ground, and he kicked his leg around like a little kid. Seeming to make up his mind, he looked up and said, "Well, if you really want to, Alisa, I mean, uh… Well, you could go on this mission. I mean, it's Song's first mission as a leader and I'm sure she'd love to have you along."

Alisa looked as confused as I was. She looked at me hesitantly, and I shrugged. It was up to them who came along.

"No, Kota." She finally said. Her cheeks were slightly pink. "I…I appreciate it. But I really think that you deserve to go. I mean…well, you're always working really hard and well…I took up enough of your time training me so I think you should go."

Kota seemed awed. "Are you sure? I…I really don't mind."

But from the excited tensing in his legs, I could tell that he really wanted to go.

Alisa suddenly smiled. "Yeah. I'm sure. Go."

Kota grinned, and before anyone could react, he pecked Alisa on the cheek. Her face instantly lit up in red, Kota's a similar colour. As if fearing a blow, he skittered away, yelling, "Well, hurry up! Let's go!"

Sakuya hid a giggle behind her hand as she followed him. Soma lumbered after her, leaving Alisa and I alone.

She hesitantly touched her cheek where Kota had missed her. The redness did not face, nor did the surprise in her eyes.

"What…what was that?" She stuttered.

I shrugged. How was I supposed to know what went on in Kota's head?

A small smile came over her face. "Is this…is this what happens when you be nice to someone?"

On my notepad, I scrawled:

Not usually.

Her smile seemed to widen just slightly at that. "Well, does Kota usually do that to people?"

I've never seen him do it before.

The smile got the slightest bit wider.

I was confused. I thought Alisa hated Kota. So why did she seem so…happy? And her face was red.

The only time I'd seen a face get red like that was when one of the little Ghetto boys offered Aiko flowers. Her face had gone red like that, and then she'd made a vicious face at him before he scurried off. Most puzzlingly, she then turned to me with the widest smile.

With a jolt I realized exactly what was going on. I used my hand to stifle a giggle, just like Sakuya had done.

"What is it?" Alisa asked, obviously confused at my reaction.

I managed to put a serious expression back on my face before waving to say nothing.

She still seemed a little confused, but let it go. "Well…you should probably head out." Her face broke into a smile. "Good luck! I know you can do it!"

I felt my own blush rise to my face. With a smile and a nod, I walked off.

Licca greeted me as I retrieved my God Arc. As I was about to turn around and head out, someone tapped my shoulder. I turned around and nearly jumped out of my skin. Soma was standing there, Buster Blade propped on his shoulder.

For a while no one said anything. I was trying desperately to think of something to say, but nothing came to me.

Just when I thought about running away, Soma said: "Congrats."

I blinked, then blinked again. He'd just congratulated me.

When I didn't answer he got a little more agitated. "Look, this doesn't mean that I'm completely comfortable with you as a Leader. You've got a lot of improving to do before you get to Lindow's level."

That finally snapped me out of my confusion. I reached for my notepad, counting myself lucky that I'd remembered to grab it. I wrote:

I don't want to replace Lindow.

He seemed surprised, but that quickly faded into an expressionless mask. "Good."

With that Soma walked passed me. If I hadn't been paying attention, I would have missed what he said next: "Become a good Leader in your own right, not by trailing after an MIA."

When I turned around, he was gone.

* * *

Wheeeee~!

Okay, I have nothing more to say. Even though I probably sound like a broken record every time I say this, thank you all for reading and for your continued support!


	28. XXVIII

XXVIII

**Song**

A Sariel. What does a Sariel look like? I should have asked Soma instead of sitting here, wondering how the hell to craft a strategy without having any idea of what this enemy was.

My notepad lay blank in front of me, with Kota, Soma, and Sakuya gathered around it. I could tell from their expectant stares that it was up to me to come up with a plan.

"Umm…" Kota interrupted, and I dreaded what was coming next. "What exactly is a Sariel?"

I nearly breathed a sigh of relief when he directed that question at Sakuya.

She smiled as she answered. "It's a flying Aragami, so you will need to concentrate on aerial attacks. It's weak to everything except Divine."

I counted myself lucky that I'd brought along my Fire Knife and not something else.

"It is highly mobile and scatters dust, which is often poisonous. If you get poisoned, your health will slowly drain. Hopefully the Bias Factor will kick in before you die."

I saw Kota gulp and tried to stop a similar reaction on my part.

"Don't worry though." Sakuya's sudden morbid attitude came to an end. "I'll be there to heal you if that happens. So, Song. Have you thought up of a plan?"

Damn it, I was hoping to avoid that.

Alright, think. What would Lindow do?

Lindow would say that we would all stick in a group and try to find it. When we did, we would all charge in and take it down as quickly as possible.

But hadn't Soma told me not to try and replace Lindow? Did that apply to borrowing his strategies too? He used common sense; surely that wasn't off-limits.

We'll stick together for now. If we can't find it, we'll split up and hope to attract it that way.

"What should we do when we fight it?" Sakuya prompted.

We'll have to rely heavily on our gunners for an aerial enemy. Soma and I will try our best to bring it down with blade attacks.

My tiny blade let me jump pretty high and pull off some pretty good aerial combos. Soma, on the other hand, had more difficulty due to the nature of his weapon. His hits were heavy, but depending on how high up this Sariel would fly he might not even get a chance to hit it.

Avoid the poison at all costs. It is treatable, but that's no reason to inhale more of it than is needed.

They all nodded at that.

What else could I say? I'd covered each of our roles and how to act if the Sariel attacked. What else could I say that wasn't obvious? Hell, I felt like I was just repeating what everyone knew. Of course you would try to avoid poison!

Alright, I think I had something.

If you see a weak point, attack it. We want to take it down quickly before it gets a chance to fly away.

Anything else? I struggled to think of something, but nothing came to mind. I was afraid that if I sat here any longer, I would just start to ramble about completely unrelated thoughts.

"We should get going." Sakuya said gently. "Any final tips, Leader?"

I hesitated before writing:

Don't die, of course. And, no matter what, come back alive. That's the priority, alright?

I felt like I was being cheap, repeating what greater people had said before. But they all nodded, standing as I put my notepad away and picked up my weapon.

"Let's take this thing down!" Kota yelled before jumping off the platform.

I wanted to yell at him to wait, but instead just jumped down and followed him, hearing Soma and Sakuya's landings.

We crawled across the Sunken Grid. The moisture of the ground seeped into my shoes, and within moments my socks were wet. I ignored the uncomfortable feeling, instead concentrating on searching for my prey. The only hint I had was that it flew, like a Zygote. For a second I wondered at my stupidity: why hadn't I just asked Soma or Sakuya about what to do, instead of refraining from doing so due to some stupid pride of mine? I would have to overcome that weakness if I wanted to be…what? If I wanted to be what? I didn't want to be a leader. It was too much responsibility, and I wasn't ready for it. I shook that thought from my mind and continued on.

As I edged around the corner I caught a glimpse of bright and dark blue. I stopped, holding my hand out and watching as the rest of my team stopped.

The top part of the Sariel looked like a pale blue woman with a large, feathery blue headdress. A giant yellow eye peered from the middle of its forehead. I watch in horrified fascination as the cat-like pupil looked about.

From the arms and the waist the barely human resemblance ended. Instead of hands the Sariel had giant blue feathery hands, like its headdress. A similarly coloured skirt rested on the waist, with dark, almost black, blue stripes. Below that were two thick legs.

-Ready?- I asked them.

Each one signalled "ok" back. I nodded, swallowed my nervousness, and headed into battle.

The Sariel made an odd purring sound when it saw me. It twirled once in the air and I jumped, slashing desperately at its skirt. Bright bullet lines pierced its head thanks to Sakuya. A bright burst exploded close to me, and I knew that Kota was firing. I heard the familiar sound of Soma's heavy blade charging as I landed, jumping again as he released it. The Aragami twirled away before my blade could sink into it, scattering a cloud of yellow dust in the air. I immediately dove away. Was that the poison? No. Soma leapt up through it just fine. The dust wasn't poisonous but rather a distraction. I cursed. I'd fallen for it.

But no matter. I leapt back into battle, frustrated that my hits were only reflecting green. The Sariel didn't look like it had strong defenses, but my attacks weren't doing too much. I saw a splatter of red where Soma hit it and gritted my teeth. I would just keep hitting it over and hitting until I brought it down.

Suddenly two flaps lifted from the Sariel's skirt. I got a chance to see a pattern of eyes like the one on its head before it clapped the two together, scattering purple dust everywhere. I dodged out of the way, breathing a sigh of relief before realizing that someone was coughing violently.

Kota was on the ground in the middle of the cloud, coughing desperately. The Sariel must have knocked him down somehow before spreading the poison. Now, with it clogging his lungs, he could barely stand.

"Kota!" I heard Sakuya yell. She fired a recovery bullet, but my armlet told me that Kota's health was deteriorating too quickly for that to be of any permanent help.

_Shit!_ I thought to myself. Kota was in no condition to move, but if he didn't move quickly the poison would kill him.

Almost without thinking I took a deep breath, holding it. I dashed into the cloud of poison, grabbing Kota by the collar and dragging him out. I took four extra steps out of the cloud to be sure before I released my breath and then took another deep one. I looked down to Kota.

He wasn't breathing.

_Shit, shit shit!_

A green arc crashed into him and he sputtered, taking in ragged breaths.

I nearly collapsed from relief. Sakuya rushed over to him, kneeling at his side. She quickly opened her bag, but only after yelling to me: "Go distract the Sariel while I stabilize him!"

As I was about to run off she pressed a Restore Pill into my hand. I swallowed it and ran off.

I felt furious. Furious that Kota had almost died, furious that an Aragami would dare touch my friend.

The Sariel twirled when it saw me. I leapt up, slashing at its hand fans. It gave a cry of pain before collapsing to the ground.

"Good work!" Soma yelled. He started striking at the Aragami's exposed legs, his hits splashing brilliant red-white. I let myself fall to the ground beside him, attacking at the same spot as he was. Most splatters of red joined his attacks.

"Attack its head." Soma suddenly told me. I jumped above the Sariel, trying my best to hit such a narrow target. A giant purple-black blade slashed down, and I recognized Soma's charged attack. The Sariel's headdress parted, revealing an ethereal, glowing blue that must have been its inner Oracle Cells. My armlet rumbled with the message that the Sariel's head was unbound.

The Sariel rose again, spinning once and releasing a glowing pillar. Soma and I paced outside of it, running at its perimeter. The oranges and blues were beautiful, but I didn't trust it. It seemed to be the Sariel's nature to entrance with beauty, but that beauty was deadly.

As the pillar faded Soma and I leapt in again. He delivered heavy blows to its legs while I struggled to attack the area above its skirt. Another one of Soma's attacks brought the Sariel down.

This time I focused completely on the legs, and within a burst of white-red I got the message that its legs had been unbounded. Another few attacks and the Sariel suddenly leapt up before falling again, struggling once more to its feet before falling to its side. My armlet signified that it had been defeated.

"Nice!" Kota yelled.

I jumped, whirling around to see that he was sitting up with a huge grin and a thumbs up. He still looked pale and unhealthy, but the expression on his face told me that he would be just fine.

For the first time in a long, long while, I allowed myself to relax. Kota was fine, the Sariel was defeated, and the mission was over.

I'd successfully completed my first mission as Leader.

* * *

Wee!

Thanks for reading!


	29. XXIX

XXIX

**Song**

"So you've completed your mission without a hitch, as expected."

I nodded. Director von Schicksal seemed pleased, reclining in the plush chair of his office. I stood straight, trying my best to seem professional even though all I wanted to do was run and hide.

The Director laced his fingers together, leaning on the desk with his elbows. His hands covered his mouth so that he was peering over his fingers with intense eyes. I tried not to shudder. He wasn't someone I should be afraid of, especially now that I was going to become Leader…if I so chose to.

"Now then. I am pleased with your performances thus far, Song…you did not let your mutism affect your achievements. They still manage to exceed your fellow rookies and some of your superiors. Now then." He narrowed his eyes. "We would be honored if you became Leader of the 1st Unit, but we cannot force you to do so. If you any objections to this promotion, make your displeasure known."

Did I really want this position? It was a crushing responsibility, keeping my teammates alive. I could no longer be simply content with sitting back and allowing others to call the shots. If I chose to become leader, that would be my duty. I could no longer be simply content with letting others take care of me. I would have to take care of myself, and them.

And yet that didn't deter me. I remember rushing into the poison and pulling Kota out of it. Would I have done that if Lindow was there? No — because Lindow would have done it. It was a leader's duty to protect others. Wasn't that why I became a Gods Eater? To protect? I'd always assumed that that meant the defenseless humans, like Mrs. Oguri and Aiko. But by spending time here surrounding by Gods Eaters, I realised that they needed the protection just as much as the citizens of the Outer Ghetto did. They were human too, after all.

What better way to protect them than to be a Leader?

I shook my head. There was no displeasure to be known. This was my path now.

The tiniest bit of a smile appeared from behind von Schicksal's hands. "Good. First, let me commend you… Congratulations on being appointed Leader! Now then… I asked you to come for a reason."

Something in his tone of voice sent a shiver up my spine.

"Your authority as Leader… And your duties… I'd like to discuss those with you. First, your enhanced privileges…as Leader, you will be given your own private room in the veteran section. That would be the room used by the previous leader, Lindow."

Lindow's room? My heart dropped to my feet. How could I possibly live in his room? The very idea seemed wrong.

"You must now log into the terminal…and update your user authority level." The Director continued, interrupting my thoughts. "You'll find that you're now able to view data that was previously off-limits to you. We have decided to disclose and share this information with you… Please, try to understand what this means."

It felt like a whole lot of expectations were dumped on me.

"Right…this is our…this is Fenrir's mark of trust." He narrowed his eyes. "I hope that you won't end up betraying that trust."

Then he continued as if no threat had been made. "Now then, next we'll discuss your duties… In addition to your regular duties, I'm to have you take over Lindow's special missions."

Special missions? I didn't like the sound of that. This new leadership seemed to be becoming a lot more complicated than I'd wanted it to.

Johannes took a moment to think. I wondered what he was doing. After about a minute he finally said: "I'll give you more detailed instructions later. I'm sure you're exhausted by the events of the day." He leaned back in his chair, a little satisfied smile on his face. "Good work. I'll be counting on you!"

X

"Wow!" Kota exclaimed. "A new room, huh?"

I stuffed my old teddy bear in a box with a little smile. Kota seemed terribly excited over my promotion. I wondered if I should be as excited as he was. All I could think about were these special missions that I would have to take. They had been missions that Lindow had been doing — could I hope to live up to Schicksal's expectations? Lindow's shoes were awfully big and I couldn't possibly hope that I could fit in them.

"You need some new clothes, Song." Alisa said as she packed my measly collection into a suitcase, the one she'd brought with her from Russia and was letting me borrow as I moved rooms. "You have four shirts, all of them basically the same design but with different colours. Your pants are the exact same. Besides, you're always wearing that ratty old sweater."

I looked down at my precious sweater. It was true that it was getting rather ragged from all the things it had been through: fair and inclement weather, Aragami attacks that I'd been too slow to dodge. I'd had to patch it in a couple of places or sew holes shut, and I was no seamstress.

"We'll have to go shopping as congratulations on becoming leader." She suggested.

"What? No way!" Kota countered. "We were going to have a party! You can't just steal Song away!"

A party? That was the first time I'd heard of a party! Sure, I'd received a lot of letters congratulating me on my position, and the moment I'd returned from the mission everyone had found a way to express their opinion on my promotion. But no one had mentioned a party!

"Well what would you rather do, Song?" Alisa asked.

I sat there, frozen. There was no way I could answer that would make both of them happy. Parties weren't really my thing…but neither was shopping. I was perfectly content in my "ratty old" sweater, thank you very much.

"I think she would rather sleep." Sakuya suggested. "And the only way she will be able to do that is if you finish moving to her new room, right?"

"Oh, yeah. Sorry." Kota said before going back to his packing of my counter. He coughed a little, but Sakuya didn't seem worried so I wasn't either. I shot her a grateful look, which made her smile.

"Still." Alisa folded another shirt and placed it in the suitcase. "One of these days we will have to go shopping."

I smiled weakly, fearing that there would be no way to escape it.

My small alarm clock followed the teddy into the box. With Alisa busy with my closet, Kota on the counter, and Sakuya supervising (mostly to make sure Kota didn't break anything) I was left with the bed. I honestly could have done all of this myself — as Alisa pointed out, I barely had any clothes, Kota's counter packing was more of a ruse to get him involved without actually straining him, and my bed was really just a teddy bear, an alarm clock, and some books. Nothing spectacular. I wasn't much of a collector, and I'd left most of my possessions behind at Mrs. Oguri's house.

The thought of her and Aiko reminded me that I had never visited them ever since I'd become a Gods Eater. These last few months — three months seemed too short of a time for so much drama and heartache, but no matter how many times I counted the answer was always three — had left me no opportunity to visit. Maybe now that I was Leader I would get a chance to…or I would just be drowned in _more_ work.

I very nearly sighed until I heard a knock on the door.

I glanced at the others to make sure that they hadn't bumped something and made a sound like a knock, but they were all looking at the door curiously. Putting the box down on my bed, I stood and opened it.

Soma was standing there. I was surprised. What exactly did he want?

"Can—" He started, but Sakuya spoke over him.

"Oh, Soma! Why don't you help us pack?"

He frowned at her before realising that she wasn't the only one here. "Never mind. I'll come back later."

He turned to leave.

"No, don't go!" Sakuya yelled. "C'mon Soma, at least help your new Leader carry something! I don't really want her doing anything especially strenuous, considering she probably inhaled some poison."

Soma frown deepened, but I took a step back and let him in. He went and sat on my bed, right beside my box. He looked inside, raising an eyebrow at my teddy bear. I felt a flush rise to my cheeks, so I quickly picked up the book on my night table and stuffed it in the box, shielding the bear from sight.

That was the last thing close to my bed, so I closed the box. I looked up to see that Kota was done his packing, and Alisa was finishing up. Soma seemed to notice this too, because he picked up the box just as Alisa finished closing the suitcase.

"What room?" Soma asked, looking at me with unreadable eyes.

"Lindow's old room." Sakuya answered for me with the slightest trembling in her voice. But then she managed to fix it, adding cheerfully, "Looks like we'll have a new neighbor!"

_What?!_ I hadn't realized that! I mean, I knew that their rooms were besides Lindow's old one, but I'd never even taken a moment to remember that. My panic was cut short when Soma stood and left the room, leaving me to follow him.

The elevator was awkward. It left before Sakuya and the others caught up, leaving Soma and I alone. I remembered the other time I'd been alone with Soma in an elevator. He'd basically grabbed me and forced me into my room all under the pretense that he'd thought Doc Sakaki had spoken to me about something. Hell, I hadn't even figured out what that was about. It had sort of just been ignored with all the drama surrounding Alisa.

This elevator ride was quiet, awkward, and — luckily — uneventful. The moment the doors opened Soma headed off. I opened the door for him, and he placed the box down on my new night table.

The room looked just like Lindow had left it, although it was a lot cleaner.

"If you need anything, just knock on my door." Soma said somewhat gruffly.

I nodded, lost in looking around the room.

I didn't even fully understand what he'd said until Sakuya came in, interrupting my perusal of the room. Soma had basically invited me to go visit him whenever I liked, or at least when I needed to. Since when was he so friendly? Hell, he'd even complimented me twice today!

"Song?" Sakuya asked, snapping me once again out of my thoughts. "Wow, you must be really tired! Well, we'll finish unpacking as quickly as we can and leave you to your sleep."

I smiled at that. Unpacking was a lot quicker than packing — this room was quite a bit larger than my other one, so I basically just told them to dump everything wherever and that I would sort it later. With that done I lied down on the bed with unfamiliar sheets in an unfamiliar room, wondering where this unfamiliar path would take me.

* * *

My gosh the Director speaks with so many ellipses it's ridiculous! Hehe. Well anyway, now Song is officially leader of the first unit! This chapter was pretty long, but I hope you guys enjoyed it. :3 I don't know if I've ever mentioned this, but close to the end of the month I'm going to Italy for a school trip! I'm so excited and really scared at the same time! XD This will be the first time I travelled to Europe, across the ocean no less (okay I've been to Hawaii but I dunno if that counts)! I think I'm the most excited because it's a school trip, which means no parents and my friends will be there! Besides, the teachers coming with us are some of my faves so that's even cooler.

Anyway, I'll try to post quite a few chapters. I'll only be gone for a week, but I think it's only fair that if I get so much excitement you guys should get some too! Haha. As always, thank you so much for reading and for your support thus far!


	30. XXX

XXX

**Soma**

"Where's Song?" Kota whined, placing his head on the table. "What, is she too good for us all of a sudden?! Where is she?!"

"Probably trying to avoid your whining." I growled.

He glared at me. "Oh _please_. She hangs around you often enough, she should be used to whining."

"And what is that supposed to mean, exactly?!" I snarled.

"Boys, boys." Sakuya sighed. "There's no need to get so riled up. She's probably just tired and in no mood to deal with two boys fighting over her."

Alisa giggled at that before taking another bite of her meal.

"Yeah right." I grumbled.

"But it is strange." Alisa said. "We haven't seen her at all in the last few days! She doesn't even show up for meals anymore!"

I had a chance to see a surprised look on Kota's face before something hard hit the table. Alisa, who had been sitting beside me, jumped, and I forced myself not to. When I turned, I saw that Song was sitting at my other side, face planted firmly in the table.

"Song! Oh no, are you alright?!" Alisa cried.

Song turned her head towards her. I noticed that she had black bags under her eyes, along with a few scratches on her cheeks. Despite that she still smiled and signed "ok".

I frowned at her. "Your back's bleeding."

Her eyes widened. She reached desperately for her back, missing the wound completely.

"Here." I lightly grabbed her hand, guiding it to the slash in her back. The cut edges of her sweater revealed that it was still bleeding, though it wasn't as dramatic as would have been when she was first cut.

Her cheeks grew red. Thinking that she'd found the wound, I released her hand. Alisa leaned back in her seat to get a look, and she gasped.

"How can you not feel that?!" Alisa screamed in my ear. I winced at the shrill tone of her voice.

Song just shrugged, would just made more blood come out of the wound.

"Let me see." Sakuya sounded calm despite the gong show. She stood up, walking over to get a good look at Song's back. What she saw made her frown. "Yeah, you should definitely get to the infirmary."

Song sighed.

"But not before you eat something." Sakuya handed her the corn-on-the-cob that was on her plate. Song took it gratefully, even though Sakuya was probably just handing it out because she didn't like it. She took a bite out of it before leaving.

"That was weird." Kota muttered. "We see her for the first time in days and she's wounded like that? And she doesn't even _feel_ it?"

"She must be exhausted." Sakuya said as she returned to her seat.

"From what?" Alisa asked, obviously having calmed down when Song left.

"I don't know." Sakuya answered, but I could practically see the gears turning in her head. She had an idea of what was going on, god damn it. Why wouldn't she tell us?

I frowned. Maybe it was special missions? The Director was no stranger to using others. I was pretty sure Lindow had had some when he was Leader. So maybe Song had inherited those? It was just like von Schicksal to not notice that he was running someone to exhaustion.

"She was on some kind of mission, obviously." Alisa pointed out. "Only an Aragami could have hurt her like that."

"Why was she going on missions without us?" Kota whined. "I thought we were her team!"

"Why don't you just go ask her?" I growled.

They all looked shocked, as if that hadn't occurred to them at all.

"Seriously?" I muttered.

Alisa and Kota glanced at each other before they both took off. Sakuya looked at me. "You aren't coming?"

"No." I took a bite out of my meatloaf.

She raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.

"Just go." I sighed when I saw that she wasn't moving.

"You're not curious at all?"

I frowned at her. "What don't you understand about 'no'?"

This time it was her turn to sigh. "Fine. But I'm going to tell Song not to explain herself to you! Then you'll wish you came!"

"Just go." I growled.

Sakuya raised her hands in defeat. "Alright, alright. I'm going."

With that she stood up and left.

"Not like I care." I muttered darkly to myself.

I took another bite of meatloaf, then another one. Then I cursed to myself and stood up, following Sakuya's exit.

X

**Song**

"Whoah there!" Kanon asked as I sat down on a hospital bed, ready for her to treat me. "What happened here?"

I shrugged, kind of embarrassed.

"Don't move!" She growled. "And no eating in the hospital!"

Kanon took the half-eaten cob from my hand and threw it in the trash.

I froze in the position I was in. Whoah. Kanon could be scary.

When she spoke again, her voice was all honey. "Boy, the hospital has been really busy lately! Sakuya and I have been swamped!"

Deciding that making polite conversation would probably keep her calmer — she had started stitching up my wound, and I didn't trust an angry Kanon with a needle — I took out my notepad and wrote. I was careful to keep my back unmoving the entire time. When she didn't snap at me, I assumed I'd done a good job.

Why are you and Sakuya working in the hospital?

"Oh, you haven't heard?" Kanon said brightly. "On a helicopter ride back to Russia, Dr. Oguruma got devoured by Aragami!"

The happiness in her voice as she said that was a lot creepier than her violent mood swings.

But the news of Dr. Oguruma's death cheered me up quite a bit. Finally, that horrible man was gone.

"There, done." I felt Kanon's light fingers trace an older wound. "Geez, Song. Every time you come back from a mission you show up with new wounds. Honestly, I ask you to take your shirt off and you're riddled with them. What exactly has been going on?"

I felt uncomfortable under her scrutiny, not to mention that she just had to mention that I naked…well, not exactly. A bunch of old bandages covered my breasts, mostly due to a wound on my side. Still, it was awkward enough without Kanon having to mention it.

"That's what I'd like to know!" Kota exclaimed.

I stifled a scream, whirling around — and ignoring the pain in my back — to see Kota and Alisa standing in the doorway. Sakuya stood behind them, and…

Soma?!

Damn it, damn it, damn it! He was the person I least wanted to be seen naked by! With horror I realised that my face was warm. I pulled the covers up to my chest, but didn't stop there. I pulled them up to my chin, hiding most of my face in embarrassment.

"Don't move!" Kanon snapped, hitting me on the head.

"That's no way to treat a patient." Sakuya admonished, though she sounded amused.

"This little brat won't listen otherwise!" Kanon snarled, but a second later the scary face went away and her voice returned to a pleasant tone. "Okay, I'll leave you guys to it! Be more careful next time, okay Song?"

I nodded, fearing the consequences of not listening to her. Kanon beamed and skipped out of the hospital.

"That is seriously creepy." Kota muttered.

-I agree completely.- I replied.

Suddenly Soma pushed his way past Alisa and Kota, coming to loom over me.

"Turn around." He growled.

I clutched the cover tighter, shaking my head.

"Whoah, calm down, Soma!" Kota snapped.

"Turn around!" He yelled.

I'd never seen him so angry before. His fists were clenched. Why? Maybe he was worried? I decided that there was no point in angering him further. I turned myself around, already feeling somewhat foolish.

X

**Soma**

The fresh wound was there, dark and terrible. Black wire crisscrossed the cut where Kanon had sewn it back together.

But worst of all were the less fresh wounds that covered her back. She was usually a lot more careful than that — what could possibly have done that to her?

I traced one of the scars, making her shiver. Alisa, Kota, and Sakuya crowded around to get a look.

"Wow, Song." Kota murmured. "What happened?"

There were way too many of them. Were those what had made her so exhausted?

No, wait.

"Why don't you tell him?" I spat. "Why don't you tell him why you've been taking so many solo missions and have been working yourself to exhaustion?"

She stiffened under my touch and I knew I was right.

"Song…" Alisa murmured.

She pointed to her notepad and pencil, which were lying on the floor because she had moved so violently before. Her arm was similarly covered with scratches.

I took my hand off her back, grabbing and handing them to her. She started to write immediately, handing it back to me. I didn't want to read it, so I just flipped it over to show the others.

Soma's right. I've been training.

"This isn't training." Sakuya actually sounded upset for once. "You're not helping yourself by beating yourself up."

This time Song turned of her own free will. She looked angry. She was about to write something, but stopped herself, shaking her head instead, as if we wouldn't understand.

Sakuya frowned. "Lindow did the exact same thing, you know."

The anger instantly fled from Song's face, replaced by surprise.

"The moment he became Leader, he trained and trained." Sakuya continued. "He kept throwing himself at solo missions so that he could become stronger. I knew what he was doing because I was the operator at the time. Every time he'd come to do another mission he was more beat up than before. He looked exactly like you, Song."

Song seemed too surprised to answer.

"It was only later, when he was drunk out of his mind, that he told me why he did that. He felt _inadequate_. He was scared of being Leader. He wanted to protect everyone, but he felt like he wasn't strong enough yet. That's why you're doing this, aren't you?"

Song flinched, but Sakuya wasn't done yet.

"What he didn't realize was that he was already strong enough! That's why he became Leader! God damn it, Song! You dove into a poison cloud to save Kota, you helped Alisa recover, you even took down the Aragami that killed your parents!" I wondered how she knew that, but figured that Kota would have told her. "You're plenty strong already! If anything, it's your own self that's holding you back. You think you're weak, so you are. But you aren't weak! You're probably the strongest person here!"

Song's eyes widened further, both at Sakuya's outburst and at what she'd said last. She was about to shake her head, but stopped herself.

"I'll let you reflect on that." Sakuya said, calm once more. She turned to the rest of us. "C'mon. Let's leave her alone for a while."

Alisa and Kota were too shocked to resist. They followed her. I was about to too when I felt a tugging at my sleeve.

"What?" I asked, turning to Song.

She let go of my sleeve, quickly scribbling onto her notepad.

She's lying, isn't she?

I scoffed. "Why would she?"

I let her shock silence her as I walked away.

* * *

Here, forgive this slightly late chapter because of the flight amount of fluff! *holds chapter out reverently*

Haha, anyway. I don't have much more to say. So, as always, thank you all for reading, and THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE 100 REVIEWS! You guys are all so amazing I'm crying! ;A;


	31. XXXI

XXXI

**Song**

"Oh, come on!" Alisa whined. "This would look really cute on you!"

I frowned at it. It looked small. Too small. Was that supposed to be a shirt? It didn't look like it covered much.

"Jeez, you're picky." Alisa sighed, placing it on her arm in a pile she had dubbed 'hopefuls'. "Alright then. I've been suggesting clothes for the last hour. Your turn to pick something out."

I stood up from my seat, wincing a little when my back protested. It was healing, but I would rather that it healed just a little faster. Kanon had removed the stitches two hours ago, leaving Alisa to drag me out here.

Navigation though the racks of clothes was easy. I knew exactly what I wanted. When I found it, I plucked it from the rack and showed my find proudly to Alisa.

Her jaw dropped. "Are you serious?"

I nodded. The familiar purple sweater felt safe in my hands.

Alisa brought a hand to her forehead, muttering something in frustration before saying more clearly: "Song, you have got to be the most stubborn person I have ever met."

I shrugged. I turned to go pay the cashier but Alisa stopped me by grabbing her arm.

"No, don't you dare. Has it ever occurred to you that maybe the reason you're so meek is because you're hiding in a giant sweater?"

I turned back to her, frowning. -How so?-

"Think about it. They say that variety is the spice of life, right? New clothes equals new outlook on life! If you start with a little more daring of clothes you'll become more of a daring of a person."

-What if I don't want to?-

"Get that ugly pout off your face." Alisa snapped. "Geez, Song. How old are you?"

-18, thank you very much.-

"Yet you have to take advice from a 15 year old!" Alisa said, jabbing a finger to her chest. "Look, trust me on this. It might sound dumb, but if you just let clothes work their magic…well, I can guarantee to you that it will work. Besides, a Leader has to look strong and confident, not drowning in a giant sweater."

I stiffened and she grinned, knowing she'd hit a nerve. "Besides, you've got a good body. Why not show it off? You wouldn't have guessed who was ogling you in the hospital. Really, why not put on something a little special for—"

I covered my ears and shut my eyes, as if that would help ward off the words. Instead of finishing her sentence, Alisa just giggled.

"Geez! You're really easy to tease, you know that! Your face is so red!"

I gave her a look, but she didn't seem disturbed. Finally, I caved.

-Fine. But nothing like _that_.- I gestured wildly towards the tiny thing perched on her arm.

Alisa grinned. "Atta girl! Alright, you won't regret this, I promise!"

X

"Now then. I would like to speak of your recent behaviour." Director von Schicksal said.

I tried to swallow my nervousness. I should have expected a talk from him after my recent escapades, but I was hoping to get a little more time. I had just gotten back from Alisa's little shopping trip when von Schicksal had summoned me.

"Soma was quite upset, to say the least, but I believe I am more upset than he is. I appreciate the sentiment, Song, but throwing your life away so recklessly just won't do."

My eyes widened. What was he talking about?

"Your training was to learn to use the Long Blade, correct?"

I nodded.

"And while I am sure that was successful, considering the amount of missions you left in your wake, I would not like you to do something like that ever again. As I said before, I love to see our Gods Eaters work hard to become stronger, but tiring themselves out and ignoring their wounds is not the way to do it."

I hung my head. It was true. I shouldn't have pushed myself so hard. The pressure of becoming a Leader and the feeling of weakness made me do it. I thought that by mastering a stronger weapon I could kill the Aragami faster and prevent more harm from befalling my friends. But I was stupid to take on so many missions in two days. I was exhausted, and my aching back — which I hadn't even felt when I'd gotten it due to adrenalin and fatigue — was a reminder of the mistake I'd made.

"I see that you are ashamed." Von Schicksal said stiffly before his voice softened. "I realize that you have seen the error of your ways now. Please be more careful next time. It won't do for the Far East Branch to lose another leader so quickly."

I nodded, biting my bottom lip.

"Now then. Your special assignments will have to wait a little longer until you've become more accustomed to your new position. I would like you to set a good example for your fellow Gods Eaters. While a certain recklessness is needed in this line of work, it won't do for you to be needlessly reckless."

But where did I draw the line? Diving into a cloud of poison to save Kota was reckless, but so was taking on a lot of missions within a short time frame. How was I supposed to know what was acceptable behaviour and what was not?

"Alright. You're dismissed. Please be more careful next time."

I let myself out of the office, crossing to the end of the halfway. I sighed, picking at the new outfit while I waited for the elevator. Damn it. How could I have let Alisa talk me into this?

The clatter of heels alerted me to someone approaching from behind. I turned, expecting to see Alisa, but found Tsubaki instead.

"…Well?" She asked. "How are you doing?"

_I'm freaking out because I'm not strong enough, I'm wearing clothes I would never wear, and I think I'm going to collapse from all the expectations placed on me._

She chuckled. "Right, you don't have to tell me. I can tell just by looking at your face." She placed a warm hand at my cheek. "You've got that look of panic…just like Lindow did when he first became a leader."

She retracted her hand, leaving my thoughts reeling. It seemed so strange to think of Lindow just like me. I'd only ever seen him at the top of his game, at the prime of his leadership. Now everyone kept reminding me that he was human too, that he had been a new leader once. Did it reassure me? Maybe a little. But the panic and fear was still there, no matter what anyone else said.

"First thing you need to do is take a deep breath… No one's expecting you to do everything on your own. Use your comrades, use yourself…that's the key to breeding trust." She smiled. "I'm sure you'll make a fine leader."

I smiled back, though my smile felt a lot weaker than hers.

Suddenly she shifted back into business Tsubaki. I realized that her actions before had been kind, almost motherly. Her voice was bossy once more as she said: "All right, get back to work. I'll be counting on you."

I nodded just as the elevator arrived.

* * *

Slightly late chapter again, sorry. :/ But anyway! Song obviously bought some new clothes! New chapter I'll describe them, I just felt like it would be a little out of place during this chapter. ^^

As always, thank you all for reading and for your support!


	32. XXXII

XXXII

**Song**

"I don't know, wouldn't you say the rations are getting lamer and lamer by the day? I know we can't afford to be picky, but really…"

Sakuya and I giggled at Kota's comment, pulling the edges of my jacket closer. At realizing that it wasn't my familiar sweater I immediately felt uncomfortable.

After I'd ruined my sweater so spectacularly (I'd sewn all the other cuts shut, but this one seemed beyond repair) Alisa had decided that we needed to go shopping. What she chose for me was out of my comfort zone, but that didn't seem to deter her. She justified her choice of a "Sniper Coat" as a way to build my confidence — she seemed to think that a more dramatic change to my wardrobe would somehow mysteriously gift me with courage.

The only thing I liked about it was the high collar, which would be useful for burying my face in if I got embarrassed. The rest of it seemed more to Alisa's tastes. There was some kind of choke collar around my neck. The only place the zipper actually worked was over my chest: that meant that the top of it showed a little cleavage and the bottom showed a lot of stomach. The sleeves reached to my elbows, the very ends bent up into a cuff. Strange buckles ran down the sides of the coat. Worse of all, there had been no purple colour to choose from. Instead I'd chosen the lesser of two evils: a blue stripe, closest to the practically non-existent zipper, along with a black stripe that started where the buckles ended.

The pants were better yet worse than my old ones. The tiny shorts matched the blue of the jacket. But they only reached mid-thigh! I resisted the urge to pull them farther down, realizing that that would just reveal more of me instead of helping any. Black tights with frilly ends covered most of my legs, thankfully, though they still left a patch of uncovered skin. Bright blue string ran in the middle and on the edges of this frill, ending in a bow on the side of each of my legs. The shoes were good enough, more like boots than anything. A light black rim lined the top, with bright blue covering the rest except for the "shoe" part, which was the same light black as the rim.

Kota continued, oblivious to my discomfort. "That rationed pudding, for instance…it tasted unhealthy, for god's sake! So lumpy and sweet, it almost made me puke…"

I nodded at that. He was right. The pudding was always disgusting, no matter what you tried to do to fix it. Maybe if they cut back on the sugar and blended it some more it would be a lot better.

Our conversation was interrupted when Soma arrived.

He glanced at me, obviously surprised at my change in outfit and weapon. He held the look a little too long, and I had to stop myself from crossing my arms to hide me better. Eventually he looked away, cheeks coloured a little. What was he embarrassed about?

The blush quickly faded when Kota started talking to him. "Hey! Soma! I've been thinking we should throw a party for our new leader here on our next day off — are you in?"

Darn it, I'd thought Kota had forgotten about this whole party business. Alisa must have mentioned that we went shopping together, and Kota must have gotten jealous that her idea was fulfilled and his wasn't.

"No thanks." Soma answered coldly, walking past us.

"Oh, come on," Kota whined, "don't be like that…"

Soma stopped. His voice grew colder as he said, "Go ahead and have your little love fest…just leave me out of it."

With that he leapt off the platform.

"Oh dear." Sakuya murmured with a sigh. She stood up, smiled at the both of us, and jumped off the platform after him.

Kota rushed over to the edge, yelling: "Jeez, don't act so high-and-mighty just because you're a better fighter! And don't be so arrogant after showing up late! That's why you don't have any friends! Loser!"

I kicked Kota in the shin.

"Ow!" He screamed, clutching as his leg. "What did you do that for, Song?"

-That went too far, Kota!-

"Well, it's true! He's always acting like he's holier than us or something! Whenever I try to be friendly he just gets all snobby! What am I supposed to do?!"

I sighed. -I know he can be a little rough, sometimes. But look at it this way: if you're rude to him, you're no better than he is!-

Kota frowned at me. "Why are you always defending him? Look, I know you've got some special feelings for him, but that doesn't mean you can give him special treatment! You have to treat us all equal now that you're leader!"

I frowned right back at him, choosing to ignore the first half of that comment. -Exactly. You're all my teammates, and that's why I'm not going to let you be mean to him. I'll talk to Soma about it too. At least he doesn't go around calling you a loser!-

Kota seemed to calm down at that. "You're right. Sorry. That was a little uncalled for, wasn't it?"

I smiled. -Just a little.-

"It's just…he's just…argh! I'm just trying to… That guy is too anti-social!"

-I know. We'll just have to deal with it.-

Kota grinned at that. "I think you're dealing with it quite well!"

I frowned when he wriggled his eyebrows. Before I could ask him what he meant by that he cried, "Whoops! It's time to launch the operation! Okay, let's head out!"

X

**Soma**

"Kota doesn't mean it, you know." Sakuya said gently.

"Oh yeah?" I growled, continuing to run. I was heading towards the temple, scouting for the Aragami. If that didn't work I would go around the other side. I had no idea why Sakuya was tagging along — at least I didn't until she'd decided to have this little heart-to-heart chat.

"Yes. He's brash and says the first thing that comes to mind. He's so friendly with everyone that he hates the idea of someone being unfriendly. He's trying to be friends with you, Soma. It's not his fault that you don't respond well to that."

"Maybe if he had some brains he'd buzz off." I snapped. "Him and Song are the exact same."

"You aren't nearly as rude to Song." Sakuya pointed out. "Actually, that's really what I wanted to talk about. What's going on between you two?"

"Nothing."

"That quick of an answer tells me that there is something. Oh come on, it's obvious. You showed up at her door a couple days ago, thinking it would be her alone in her room. You freaked out on her when you realized exactly what was going on with her wounds. That's not like you."

"Is it so wrong to not want a new Leader to die?" I snarled.

"No, of course not." Sakuya sighed. "It's just…honestly, Soma. It's not wrong to admit to some things, you know?"

"What things? I don't know what you're talking about." Stupid, nosy Sakuya.

She giggled. "Oh come now. It's obvious, isn't it?"

I whirled around, forcing her to stop running behind me. "I don't know what's got into that little twisted mind of yours, but if you don't fuck off soon I may just have to split your head open and find out."

She seemed merely amused as I turned and ran off.

X

**Song**

The Chi-You fell finally. I relaxed a little — my first mission using a Long Blade in front of my team had gone well. That was the reason I'd been training so much alone. I was hoping to master this new type of weapon before showing it off.

But one thing bothered me.

-Soma?- I signaled to Sakuya.

She shrugged. "He just ran off before I could catch up to him."

I frowned. He hadn't appeared all mission. We'd found the Gboro-Gboro with some damage done to it already, the characteristic marks of a Buster Blade covering its scales. But Soma had been nowhere to be seen. The Chi-You had been in the same condition. At least he'd helped a little before going off to…what? Sulk?

"We can't leave without him." Kota sighed, as if he really wanted to. He sat on the Chi-You's slowly dissolving corpse, cleaning his gun with a little rag he produced out of his pocket.

-I'll go find him.- I told them.

Kota gave me a meaningful look. I interpreted it as a warning not to forget to scold Soma when I found him. I smiled a little to show him that I'd gotten the message.

"Just be careful." Sakuya said. "There might still be Aragami nearby."

I nodded and ran off.

X

**Soma**

I walked into the temple. The rotting floorboards echoed under my feet. The faint sound of battle found my ears — Song and the others must have found the Chi-You I had been fighting.

_Loser!_ Kota's voice echoed in my mind.

I growled. No, I wasn't bothered by him, no matter what Sakuya said. As if I could be bothered by something so minor as that.

My thoughts were interrupted when I sensed it: the presence.

"Who's there? Show yourself!" I yelled.

My voice echoed emptily. There was nothing to be seen.

"I know you're there!" I growled.

I heard footsteps. Whirling around, I help out my blade, almost hitting…

Song?

She looked surprised and unnerved by the blade. She raised one of her hands, a sheepish grin on her face.

-You never showed up, so I came looking for you.- She signed.

I frowned at her. "Who asked you to look for me? I'm gonna do whatever the hell I want."

She hesitated, but eventually frowned back. -Do whatever you want? Oh, like be rude to Kota and wander around while everyone else is fighting?-

Where had she gotten that newfound confidence? "Right. Exactly like that."

Song growled at me. I tried not to betray my surprise.

-Really? Well that's one of the two things that I've come to talk to you about. First off, Lindow may have put up with it, but I won't.-

I frowned at her. "Oh yeah?"

She didn't back down. -I already talked with Kota. He'll try his best to be nicer to you, and I want you to do the same. We're comrades. We can't be treating each other like this.-

I grunted. "Comrades, huh? If you're talking about the comrades who can't survive a little jab, who you can't even trust to have your back… It's better not to have them at all."

She glared at me. -Perhaps the reason you can't trust them is because you aren't letting yourself.-

_Don't seem surprised, don't seem surprised._ I wasn't sure how successful I was.

-Kota is dumb, to be honest. But that doesn't mean he is completely unworthy of your trust.-

I sighed. "Fine. I'll try my best."

She smiled. -Alright. Second matter of business.-

Before I knew it she had walked up and wrapped her arms around me.

I didn't know why she did it, and I didn't know why I let her do it. But instead of pushing her away, I just let her hug me until she was done.

"Satisfied?" I growled when she pulled away.

Song just smiled. She gestured for me to follow her, turning around and heading out of the temple.

"You shouldn't have anything to do with a monster like me." I warned.

She glanced back at me, the smile still on her face. -I'll take my chances.-

* * *

Fluff fluff fluff

Haha, anyway. Thank you all for reading for your continued support!


	33. XXXIII

XXXIII

**Song**

-A party?- I asked.

"Yeah!" Kota exclaimed. "You let Alisa have her little shopping spree, so now you have to let me have my party!"

"Aren't parties supposed to be for the benefit of the person we're celebrating?" Alisa pointed out.

"We'll I don't think Song really enjoyed your shopping trip, either." Kota shot back.

I sighed. Maybe it was worth agreeing to the party just to get them to stop arguing. I took a sip of soup, trying to ignore the constant buzz of the mess hall as I mulled over the pros and cons. Pro: Kota would stop whining. Con: I didn't want to party.

Honestly, I'd much rather spend a quiet night reading. Hell, watching Bugarally would be better than being stuffed in a room full of people, with music blasting too loud and alcohol abundant. At least that was how the teenage parties went in the Ghetto.

"Why don't we actually ask Song what she wants?" Sakuya suggested.

Instantly, two sets of eyes turned to me: one very eager and one hoping that I would say no.

I flinched. Damn it, Sakuya! I was still trying to make a decision!

But, as Kota had pointed out, Alisa had managed to make me go on a shopping trip. So wouldn't it make sense to give Kota what he wanted, too?

-Alright.- The moment I signed it I knew my fate was sealed.

"Great!" Kota cried. "Okay, leave all the planning to me! This will be the greatest party ever!"

The excitement in his eyes made me a little more hopeful.

The rest of the meal was peaceful and quiet as we each thought our own thoughts. I wondered at the mission ahead. We had to take down a Quadriga. I hadn't managed to train against one with my new weapon — its weak points were completely new to me. I would have to watch Alisa for help.

At the end of the meal I was perfectly pleased with accepting the party until Kota asked: "What's your opinion on chocolate fountains?"

X

**Soma**

Song looked very nervous, standing there with a bandanna over her eyes. Kota guided her by pushing on her shoulders. He wasn't a very effective driver — as I thought that, she stumbled over a large rock in her path.

"Careful." I growled.

Kota shot me a look. When he'd invited me, he'd made it very clear that he was doing so because he felt like Song would have wanted it, not because he wanted me to come.

Why did I agree to go? Because I didn't want to leave Song alone with these idiots. The only one I remotely trusted was Sakuya, but I felt that she needed a hand in controlling the two rookies…hell, maybe even controlling the "Rookie Leader" as she was now being called.

"Are we there yet?" Alisa whined.

"Almost!" Kota assured her, forgetting his annoyance with me.

Song's hands fluttered, but what she was saying seemed almost…slurred. Her lack of vision must have been throwing her off.

"We can't tell you where we're taking you." Sakuya answered, sounding amused. "That's the whole point of the surprise, don't you think?"

Song frowned, or at least that what it seemed like considering her eyes and forehead were covered.

Alisa looked around, sniffing disdainfully at the surroundings. I had to admit that they weren't as prim and proper as she was probably used to, but they were a whole lot better than being out in the wilderness, like the original idea had been.

Sakuya went over and tapped Kota's shoulder. When she had his attention, she signed: -This seems like a good spot.-

Kota nodded. With a grin he said, "Alright, Song, ready for your surprise?!"

She only seemed slightly nervous as she nodded.

Kota ripped the bandanna from her eyes. Song blinked three times to adjust to the light before her eyes widened.

I tried looking at the scene through what she would see.

Rows upon rows of bright trees filled the space. The trees each had fruits of different colours and sizes. A dark ceiling was interspaced with lamps, which could be mistaken for stars.

Song seemed awed, and I wondered if Kota had made a good choice.

"Yeah, it's not like real camping." Kota explained. "But we thought that it would be hard to enjoy a camping trip while having to worry about Aragami. Down here in the Branch's orchards, we won't have to worry about Aragami!"

Song smiled grandly, turning towards him. -Thank you. This is amazing!-

Alisa seemed surprised that she actually liked it. I was a little confused too. Song didn't really strike me as a kind of wild person. She was no stranger to getting dirty — with all the rolling we had to do to dodge the Aragami, I don't think any of us were — but I wasn't sure that he idea of fun was spending a night in a tent out in the wild…although this couldn't really be considered the wild.

"We're cleared to stay for two nights." Sakuya said. "We took care of the all supplies, including food. Although I'm sure they wouldn't mind if we took a couple of these tasty fruit." She winked.

I thought it wouldn't be possible for Song to smile wider, but she proved me wrong. -Alright! Let's set up camp then!-

"No, you're not setting up anything." Alisa told her, sounding pleased with herself for once. "We've decided that since you've been working so hard we would set up everything for you!"

Song seemed taken aback. Then she grimaced. She raised her hands to sign, but Kota interrupted her. "Nope! This is not up for discussion! You're gonna sit and relax, munch on an apple or something, while we do all the work for once!"

He silenced her protests by taking her by the shoulders once again, setting down a folding camp chair, and making her sit in it.

She watched, somewhat upset from what I could tell. She nearly stood as Alisa struggled with the tent, but a look from Kota made her sit back down even though she wasn't happy about it. Even when she plucked an apple from the tree behind her she was still unhappy.

"Here." I said, tossing her a knife. "Go find some long, thin branches. Kota wants to roast hotdogs over a fire."

She grinned at me with the childish joy of defying her "superiors" before running off.

When she was out of earshot, Sakuya gently reminded me: "She wasn't supposed to do any work."

"It's not much." I answered. "Besides, it might fall under your definition of 'fun' and should keep her occupied long enough for her to not be sitting here whining."

"She was only whining if you were looking at her." Kota muttered.

I glared at him but he went right back to setting up the table and chairs.

"He has a fair point." Sakuya said, giggling. My glare turned to her, and she returned with an amused look. I wondered when my glares had stopped working on her.

X

**Song**

I returned with five sticks to find the campground completely set up.

A large tent, big enough for all five of us (I was hoping), sat at the far end of our little set up. A fire roared from a pile of logs, which Soma had been chopping earlier before he'd thrown me the knife. Five chairs sat around the fire, a little table behind those upon which were set up a package of wieners, condiments, and buns. Lamps were placed strategically around the campsite. Just as I wondered what they were for, the roof lights went out, leaving everything illuminated by the fire and the lamps.

"There you are!" Alisa greeted me. "We'd thought you'd gotten lost!"

I shook my head, hoping that they'd just think the long time was because I had trouble finding good sticks, not because I had, in fact, gotten a little lost.

"Well hurry!" Kota said, grabbing one of the sticks from me and spearing a wiener onto it. "We're all starved!"

I smiled, handing out the roasting sticks.

X

Three hours later we were all huddled comfortably in the tent. I was content. I felt safe. It was a sensation new to me — I'd constantly felt fear, fear that any peaceful moment would disintegrate in a second. But sitting here, surrounded by my team-mates…no, my friends, I felt like there was nothing that could go wrong.

I was about to fall asleep when I noticed that I had miscounted — Soma wasn't here.

I frowned, rubbing at my eyes. Where could he have gone? I mean, this was a tiny orchard. I hadn't noticed him slip away while we were eating. It must have been when we were all piling into the tent that he'd escaped.

Trying my best not to disturb the others, I left the tent. I found Soma outside, staring at the dying embers of the first as he drank from a can of beer. I hadn't realized that beer had been packed — he must have brought it from his private stores.

I sat down in the chair beside him. He didn't say anything for the longest while. He offered me another can of beer, but I declined. I wasn't in the mood to drink.

Eventually the silence became unbearable.

-You're not going to join us?-

"You should get some sleep."

I blinked, realizing that we'd both spoken at the same time.

"Sorry." Soma said. "You go first."

So I repeated my question.

He frowned, taking a long sip from his beer before he replied. "Cuddle fests aren't really my thing."

-So you're just gonna stay out here the entire time?-

"As if." He rolled his eyes at the ridiculousness of it. "No, I'll probably be returning to my room soon."

I'd almost forgotten that we were basically in Fenrir's basement.

Maybe it was the darkness that made it easier, or maybe Soma was more comfortable in the dark, but what he said next was very forward and honest for him. "Look. I appreciate that you're trying to pull me into your little group, but…that's not for me."

I raised an eyebrow. -So loneliness and solitude are your kind of thing?-

He growled at that. "That's not what I meant." He snapped.

I smiled. -I know. And I understand…"cuddling"- I did the air quotes for that -might be a little out of your comfort zone. But…that doesn't mean I'll stop.-

He frowned at me. "Why go so far for me? Damn it, I don't want this!"

I shrugged. I'd let him try and figure that one out for himself. Without another word I turned back and settled into the tent.

* * *

Hehehe, some good old bonding time! I always liked the idea of the Gods Eaters on a camping trip, but I decided that they would probably be happier not having to worry about Aragami. Besides, one of the cutscenes mentioned that the Branch was completely self-dependent (it was actually a different word but I can't remember what it was) so it makes sense for it to have an underground for food production, right?

Anyway! Wow, I am just so excited! I leave for Italy on Sunday. ^^ And I just remembered that on the 13th of April it's gonna be my birthday! :o I'll be turning 18...wow, I'm getting old! XD

Before I leave I'll try to get a couple more chapters up for you guys. So, as always, thank you all so much for reading and for supporting me and my story! :3


	34. XXXIV

XXXIV

**Song**

"Oh, Song!" Hibari greeted me as I entered the lobby. "The Branch Director wants you. Please go see him. You can find him in his office."

I nodded, holding back a sigh. Figures that right after my little "vacation" I would be forced right back into work.

Quickly thanking Hibari, I headed to the Executive Section. I barely waited for the Director's "come in" after I knocked. By the time he said it I already had my hand on the doorknob.

"Your achievements of late have been quite spectacular." Von Schicksal went straight to business, no greeting made. "I never imagined that you'd develop such leadership qualities so short a time…it must be a New-Type characteristic."

I doubted that being able to use a rare type of God Arc would contribute to being a good leader, but I didn't object. If it did help, I would be extremely happy. Any extra hand at this business would be welcomed.

"Now then…" He sat back in his chair. "You may already be aware of this, but the Aegis Project is about to enter its final stage." He suddenly leaned forward again, intent. "The Ark that will protect us from the Aragami threat, and guide humankind to a new future… It will soon be completed. Certainly a cause for celebration. We're almost there… I'd like you to help me just a bit longer."

I nodded just as the computer buzzed. He clicked a button and it stopped, but not before he frowned. "I'm expecting someone now. Forgive me — let's continue this another day. At any rate, I expect even loftier achievements from you and your unit. That's all. You're dismissed."

I nodded again, exiting his office as quickly as I could without seeming rushed.

I saw Dr. Sakaki in the hallway. That must have been who the Director was going to speak with. I would have walked right past him if he hadn't spoken.

"Are you the type of person who has a great deal of curiosity?"

When I turned to look at him, he had a twinkle in his eye. With a smile he turned around and walked into the Director's office.

Bewildered by what had just happened, I was about to walk away when something caught my eye. Lying on the ground was something flat and shining silver: a disc for the terminals here.

I frowned, picking it up. Dr. Sakaki must have dropped it. I would have to return it to him later — I didn't want to interrupt their meeting.

I was still considering the disc in my hand when I walked into the hallway leading to my room. That was a bad idea: Soma had walked out of his room, and I ran right into him.

Startled, I jumped back, realizing frantically that I wasn't holding the disc anymore.

"Watch where you're going, rook—" He interrupted his growling with a frown, but a second later he finished his sentence. "Leader."

-Sorry.- I signed, bending down to pick up the disc. He was faster than I was.

"What's this?"

I tried to grab it from him but he evaded my grasp. Figuring he wouldn't give it without an explanation, I said. -Doc Sakaki dropped it. I was going to return it but he's in a meeting right now.-

Soma frowned at the disc. "Did he say something weird when he dropped it?"

It was my turn to frown. How did he know? -Well he asked me if I was a curious person…-

Soma rolled his eyes. "Seriously, rookie? Shouldn't it be obvious?"

He saw my blank look and continued. "He _wants_ you to take a look at it. That sneaky bastard can't say anything straight."

That made my frown deepen. What could possibly be on that disc? I tried grabbing the disc from his hands again but he easily avoided my grasp. Damn it! I was taller than him — how the hell could he keep it out of my reach?

-Give it to me!-

"I never said I would give it back." He answered calmly, turning the disc around in his hands as if to taunt me.

_Damn it! I thought I was supposed to be the leader! How can I just let him bully me around like this?_

-Give it to me.- I told him, acting as calm as he was. I wanted to scream at him or try to take it from his hands again — but that was the behaviour of a two-year old, not a leader. If he wanted to act like a possessive brat, I wouldn't dare stoop to his level.

He seemed surprised, as if he had somehow sensed the change in attitude. He glared at me. When I didn't back down he gave me an appraising look.

"Fine. How about this? We watch it together." He suggested.

I narrowed my eyes. I wanted my way, where I watched the video alone. But maybe a compromise was acceptable? So I nodded.

"Alright." Soma turned back towards his room, opening the door. He paused, and added. "One rule. No matter what is on this disc, we don't stop until it is finished, and you don't breathe a word of it to a soul."

I frowned, wondering exactly what he thought was on the disc. But it seemed reasonable enough to me: the disc was obviously something covert and secret, or else Sakaki wouldn't have given it to me so sneakily. It was something I wasn't supposed to know, but he felt like I needed to know. At least that was the feeling I got.

Soma finally walked into his room, leaving me to follow.

I realized that I'd never been in Soma's room before. He'd been in mine plenty of times, but I'd never gotten the chance to visit his.

It was intimidating, to say the least.

Most of it was the typical room set-up: they were all identical after all. But instead of the window showing an artificial natural scene, his had what looked like a black board with a white human outline on it. The outline was riddled with holes, as was the boards beneath the "window" and the window itself.

I pointed at them, waiting until Soma had put the disc into the terminal and turned around. He looked at my raised eyebrow, answering simply, "Gun."

A gun? Where did Soma get a gun, and why was he using one _in his room_?

I put those questions away when the terminal's screen fizzled to life and Soma went pale.


	35. XXXV

XXXV

**Song**

Soma reached to turn the terminal off but I slapped his hand. I still wasn't sure about his strange reaction.

"Turn it off." He commanded.

I shook my head. -You said that no matter what was on the disc we wouldn't stop it.-

He glared at me. "Turn. It. Off."

I narrowed my eyes right back at him. -No. Now rewind it.-

"Fine." He growled. He rewound it as I wondered at the sudden change of heart. "But the rest of the deal still stands — you won't tell anyone what's on this video, no matter what Sakaki's trying to pull. Got it?"

The video finished rewinding just as I nodded.

It looked like a home video: the image was slightly fuzzy, with the typical frame demonstrating "recording" in red letters at the corner.

An Ogretail lied down a table in what looked like a hospital. Two people stood beside it: one a woman with skin like Soma's and long black hair, the other a man whose face was covered with a surgical mask. The man took a scalpel, lightly cutting into the Aragami's body.

Suddenly black smoke poured out of the hole. Both of the people jumped back, but it was too late. The man was engulfed by the smoke, falling to his knees as he screamed.

"No anesthesia?" The woman yelled, watching as the man was consumed.

"Hey! Help us out!" Someone else yelled. The camera toppled onto its side, revealing another man rushing towards the fallen one just because the camera gave out into a blizzard of grey.

Another scene appeared as the grey faded. This time I recognized more people: the woman from before, Dr. Sakaki, and the Director all sat around a hexagonal table. They both turned to the woman as she spoke.

"Just as we thought, embedding the Bias Factor into the adult organism would be difficult."

"Even then," Sakaki added, "it looks like it would be hard to induce apoptosis. Our best bet is to do it in the prenatal stage. We've had success with rats, at the least."

Finishing with that, he took a long sip from his coffee.

I took the break in action to sneak a look at Soma. He was still pale, but a look of wonder crossed his face, his gaze intent on the woman's face. Then the wonder was gone, replaced with a look of dread, as if he knew what was going to happen next.

"Either way, it's high time we conducted a clinical test on a human." Von Schicksal pointed out, drawing my attention back to the screen.

"I'm not rejecting that approach —taking something we don't understand in principle, and using it blindly…" Sakaki said, voice rife with sarcasm. "But we're just starting to understand what makes the P73 Bias Factor tick. I'm not sure we're ready to do this yet."

I perked up at the mention of Bias Factor. If they didn't understand it, then this video must be pretty old. Sakaki and the Director had looked exactly the same, but now that I had an idea at the age of the video, I could see some youth to their faces. Besides, the Bias Factor was in wide use today (I should know, I injected myself with it every day), so that must have meant that this video was from sometime around the discovery of the Factor.

"How can we just sit back and wait, when nearly 10,000 people a day are being devoured by the Aragami?" The Director's voice sounded frustrated and angry.

"Are you saying you're going to test it on yourself, like Pettenkofer?"

"Yes… If it proves feasible, then I'll test it on myself!"

At that the woman looked up after cradling her head in a thinking pose for the longest time. "Johannes… Let's embed it into my…into our baby."

At that, Soma stiffened. Von Schicksal's reaction was very much the same. "Have you lost your mind? I know this is your project, but…not our child…"

"It's a bridge that somebody has to cross." The woman pointed out, calm and collected despite the radical thought. "So why not us?"

"But…"

"It's feasible…" Sakaki interrupted, and I was afraid that the horrible idea would go through. "But I can't agree to it."

I nearly breathed a sigh of relief. Thank goodness _someone_ saw how crazy this was!

"I have no intention of letting our future children see a world on the brink of destruction." The woman answered sharply.

Silence fell across the table. Von Schicksal was hunched over, cradling his head in his hands much in the way the woman — the Director's wife, I assumed — had done before. Finally, he raised his head, turned to his wife, and said clearly: "You have my support."

"Both parents approve, huh?" Sakaki answered with a sigh. "Then there's no room for discussion, is there?"

_Shit shit shit._

"In that case, I'm taking myself off this project. Our methodology is too much at odds."

"Sakaki…" The woman begged.

He turned to her and spoke calmly. "I'll always be a Stargazer… I'm someone who observes the stars. I'm not going to interfere with your crucial decisions. I'm going to continue my Bias Factor research in my own way. I'm sure our paths will cross again. Excuse me…goodbye."

The video turned to gray again.

When it came back it was the same woman in a hospital gown. Her stomach had grown considerably, telling me that she was, in fact, pregnant. The hospital background acted as a harsh contrast to her dark skin. The camera focused on her face and the Director's voice asked: "How are you feeling?"

"Fine…" She answered with a little smile. "And physically well, too. I can't wait for your birth…" She added as she rubbed her stomach fondly. Then she went right back to business. "Where's Sakaki?"

"He sent you a good luck charm for a safe delivery. But he's still unreachable."

"I see… So he's still angry with us for pushing ahead with the project." Her smile faded.

"Don't think about that now." Von Schicksal said gently. "It's not good for you."

"I want you to hold onto that charm for me. Good luck tomorrow…" The smile returned.

The camera bobbed as the Director nodded and the screen faded again.

When it came back it was the Director alone, sitting at his desk. He crossed his hands in front of his face, his most comfortable pose I was starting to think. Behind him, the bright red wolf head of Fenrir snarled.

"Hello, Paylor. It's been a long time." His tone was business-like, and I wondered where the gentle tones he had used while talking to his wife had gone. "As you know, following that appalling incident, the Managarm Project was, for all intents and purposes, suspended. The only survivors of that accident were my son, who was born carrying the Bias Factor…and myself, who happened to have your "Safe Birth Charm" in my possession."

I felt a moment of grief for his wife. She had been ambitious and dedicated to the cause…and that had cost her her life. I was afraid that my teammates or I could very well meet the same fate.

The Director lowered his head so that only his eyes, which were narrowed, were visible above his intertwined hands. "Who knew that the charm technology you developed would one day be used to build an anti-Aragami Armored Wall, protecting humankind from the Aragami? As a scientist, I'm painfully aware that I cannot hold a candle to you. Most likely, you had predicted that this would come to pass… Am I wrong?"

The Director relaxed, leaning back into his chair. He chuckled, then said: "Fear not… I'm not sending this email in order to blame you for anything. In the coming weeks, I'll be appointed Director of the Fenrir Far East Branch. And so, I'd like to ask you to join forces with me once again."

With that, he returned to his intent pose. "In return, I promise you ample funding for your research…and you will also be in charge of all development pertaining to the Gods Eaters. By the way, I never introduced you to my son, Soma. Well, that being so, expect me to call on you in the near future. Until then, my friend."

The video faded and I only vaguely saw Dr. Sakaki's message asking the disc to be returned to his lab.

But what really held my attention was the fact that sitting beside me was a child born with the Bias Factor, meaning that he may very well be an Aragami himself.


	36. XXXVI

XXVI

**Soma**

An awkward silence descended. I cursed to myself. What the hell was Sakaki thinking, giving away such information as if it held no value? It wasn't Song's fucking business what I was. She didn't need to know. She didn't deserve to know.

Her silence was killing me, so I said: "There, happy? Look what your little bout of curiosity brought you."

She turned to me with a light frown. -My curiosity? You're the one who demanded that we watch it.-

I wasn't expecting a snarky response. To be honest, I was expecting her to scream at me for being a monster and then run out of the room. I would have thought that she'd connect the dots between Bias Factor and Aragami. Surely she would have figured out that I was half-Aragami?

Song returned her gaze to the terminal, even though by now it was black. She seemed to be thinking, and I shuddered. What was running through her head? How disgusted she was with me?

-Why didn't you tell anyone?-

I was so nervous I had trouble reading that. It took me a couple of seconds to realize what she'd said. I frowned. "Yeah, admit to everyone that I'm a monster? I'm sure that would go well."

She narrowed her eyes. -Don't say that. You're not a monster.-

I growled. "You'd call an Aragami a monster. So why not me?"

She returned the growl. I noticed that she was being a lot more vocal about her displeasure lately. –A monster? A monster because you were born a little different? Because of a choice you couldn't even make?-

I was stunned. How was I supposed to answer that?

She suddenly took out her notebook, scribbling fiercely. Whatever she wanted to say next was too frantic for her to signal.

If anything your parents are the monsters…but they aren't! You weren't supposed to be a monster, Soma. You were supposed to help people, not be shunned by them!

"That doesn—"

Song plugged my mouth with her hand, looking at me furiously. She looked beyond angry. After she was sure I wouldn't speak again, she removed her hand and signed: -You're only shunned because you shun yourself! That's what your problem is!-

That was when I lost it.

"You're one to talk about problems!" I snapped. "You're mute, for god's sake!"

The surprise made the anger flee from her face, but in a second it was back and more terrible than before.

But there was nothing left for her to back it up with, and I realized that with that one insult I was spent too. For a minute we just stood there, air tense with the sparks of our argument. We were both breathing heavily.

Finally, Song said something.

-Truce?-

She held out her hand.

I glared at it for a while before taking it somewhat reluctantly.

"Truce."

Song took that as an invitation to go sit down on the edge of my bed. She seemed back to normal all of a sudden — not too eager to talk and not as confrontational. Yet that somehow made her look vulnerable, even though that was how she used to be before she became the leader. With a shock I realized how much she'd changed ever since our first meeting.

The frail look suddenly disappeared, replaced by determination. She turned to me, saying -Let's make a deal.-

I frowned, feeling a slight sense of dread settling in. "What kind of deal?"

She paused, returning to her notebook. I watched her write, feeling the dread grow. What exactly did she want?

I'm going to teach you how to not shun yourself.

She'd actually written something other than "not shun", but she'd violently crossed it out until it was unreadable. I read the next part.

"Why the hell would I agree to that?" I snapped. "There's no way you can stop me from being a monster."

She gave me a dirty look.

But you aren't a monster! That's exactly your problem: you see yourself as one so everyone else does too! I want to fix that!

I growled. There was no way she would leave me alone. I wanted to force her out of my room, but the stubborn look on her face told me that she wouldn't be moving anytime soon. Picking her up and throwing her out the door would be easiest.

But what she said next stopped all those thoughts.

Your mother wanted you to be a protector, didn't she? That's why you became a Gods Eater, I bet. She never intended you to be a monster. It was your own attitude that turned you into that!

I was flabbergasted. How…how could she have guessed something like that?! Song was incredibly oblivious. So how could she have found the truth so easily? It wasn't like her to figure things out on her own.

I'm right, aren't I?

I would have expected a mocking smirk with that comment, but she managed to keep it contained.

You've been called a Death God and you call yourself a monster…so why don't we prove them wrong?

"Fine."

She kept writing but suddenly stopped, as if she hadn't thought I would agree just yet.

I met her surprised eyes and repeated myself. "Fine. I accept your deal."

She grinned at that, and suddenly she was back to the normal Song, not acting like a leader but instead a happy-go-lucky rookie.

"But I want something in return."

At that she looked doubtful. I knew she was going to ask "what" so I just continued.

"If you're going to help me with my "problem""—I accompanied that by air quotes—"then I'll help your with yours."

Song looked confused. -And what is that, exactly?-

"I'll teach you how to speak again."

She went pale at that.

I growled. "I know it's not a physical problem. You've spoken to me before. But you stop yourself because of what happened in the past."

She frowned at me. -That's not exactly a problem-

"If you're going to say my self-image is a problem, then being mute definitely is." I said through gritted teeth.

She bit her lip, frustration replaced by fear. -You don't understand. It's not something you can just fix.-

"Isn't it, though?" I snapped. "It's a psychological problem. Sakuya looked it up: it's called conversion disorder, and it's perfectly curable."

At that she looked away, the frustration returning. -You don't understand.-

"No, I don't!" I snarled. "I don't understand how you can think your voice kills people. I'm not dead, am I?"

Her eyes widened, but I wasn't done yet.

"I'm not dead, am I? Your voice doesn't kill people!"

She gritted her teeth, turning away and growling in annoyance. I could practically see her mind working. Finally she turned back to me, deadly serious.

-Alright. I accept your deal.-

* * *

Triple update for you guys! ^^ I leave for Italy tomorrow, so today's full of packing and such. O.o It's gonna be long, but I think I'm too excited to care. X3

But anyway! Thank you all so much for you support! I really hope you enjoy these three chapters. Hopefully it will tide you over for this update-less week. I get back home on the 8th, but that's at 5 a.m. so I'll probably spend the entire day sleeping. XD Anyway! Tank you all so much for reading!


	37. XXXVII

XXXVII

**Soma**

"How are you feeling?" My father's voice echoed in my head.

I tried to open my eyes to see him, but found that I couldn't. I was in some place warm, that much I could tell. There was no ground to be felt, and my breaths were more laboured than usual. It felt like I was underwater, as strange as that was.

My mother answered. "Fine… And physically well too. I can't wait for your birth…"

It was the same thing as the video before. My mother asked for Sakaki, there was a birth charm, good wishes… But she added something that wasn't caught on camera, something only between the two of us.

"You…will bring joy to this world. Protect everyone from…the Aragami…"

The warmth faded, replaced by the harsh voice of the Director. "You were born to rid the world of all Aragami. Listen to me… Exterminate them all!"

Now they were taunts, whispered in disapproving tones, reminding me that I wasn't human.

"His basal metabolism is abnormally high, compared to that of normal children…"

"That boy…he needed 8 stitches for that injury…but the wound healed by the next day! He can't be human…"

"H-He has acute hearing, too…so be careful what you say, or the doctor will be angry with you."

"So, um… Is there anyone from his squad who's survived?"

"I'd rather not team up with that one if I can help it."

"In the last few days, Eric and Lindow have been killed, right? That's beyond crazy."

"Hey…hey…the doctor told me that your mother died…because of you…"

_Shit! Get me out of here!_

I was suddenly awake, being shaken violently.

"Dammit!" I swore, and the shaking stopped. I noticed Song jumping back, surprised by my sudden awakening. She must have been the one to wake me up.

"Oh!" Alisa was just as surprised as Song and more than a little angry. "R-really, you shouldn't scare people like that!"

All three of them were looming over me. As I fully awoke I remembered where I was: sitting, back against the wall of the shack that served as the starting point for the Tranquil Temple. Our mission was to take down a Borg Camlann, if I remembered right.

"Seemed like you were having a nightmare. Are you OK?" Kota asked amiably.

"Yeah…" I answered, reassured now that the dream was gone. My God Arc was at my side, and with it I could fight real terrors, not the cowardly ones that came to me in sleep.

"Huh? That's not like you, to be so civil!" Kota made his surprise obvious.

"Back off!" I growled. "Just shut up…"

Kota grinned. "That's more like it… You're fine… Come on, let's go!"

He turned around and headed off the platform as Song rolled her eyes. Alisa quickly followed Kota.

I rose to my feet as Song signed: -Are you alright?-

"I'll be fine." I snapped.

She didn't seem convinced. I felt her eyes on my back as I leapt off the platform.

X

In the letter you never wrote to me, you said that you loved me. You said that it wasn't my fault you're dead.

You told me to speak again.

Song growled, ripping the paper from her notepad before crumbling it and tossing it across the room.

"That was good." I told her tiredly. "You shouldn't have thrown it away."

My parents would never say something like that.

Her writing was an angry scrawl, so unlike the looping, neat letters her writing usually resembled.

I took the notepad from her hands, tore that paper out and repeated her action. The crumbled ball joined the many others littering the floor. It was a stark contrast to the usual cleanliness of Song's room. The only other ruffled things in the room were the blankets on her bed, and that was only because we were lying down on it.

"Again." I commanded.

Song glared at me, but dutifully returned to her notepad. Ever since our deal, she had been grumpy around me. Probably because I was intruding into her room every night now and making her do these exercises until I decided it was enough.

She could have easily avoided it. She could have locked her door, but she never did. It wasn't like I was forcing her to do anything she didn't want to — she'd accepted the deal, after all. Besides, she didn't seem like the type to go back on her word.

That was until she reared back, suddenly sitting up but only after tossing her notepad away. -This isn't working!- She said angrily.

I growled. "It's because you're not letting it work."

She frowned at me, picking up the notepad she'd just tossed. I thought she would start trying again, but instead she flipped it towards me to show what she'd written.

This isn't working. You're not a good teacher.

"I'm not a psychologist!" I snarled. "How the hell am I supposed to know how your head works?!"

She bit back an angry response, calming down.

You're right. Sorry.

I sighed. I thought about apologizing, but decided against it. "So how the hell do we fix this?"

She was silent, obviously. When I looked to her for an answer, she just shrugged, her eyes dropping a little. I glanced at the clock in her room. It said it was shortly after 11 p.m.

"Fine. We'll stop for now and continue this tomorrow."

Song nodded and I let myself out.

A voice interrupted the silence of the hallway.

"Oh ho ho. What are you doing out so late?"

I whirled around, seeing Sakuya about to enter her room. She was looking at me curiously and…somewhat mockingly.

Shit.

"What do you want?" I growled.

"I would like to know exactly why you were in Song's room so late." That little smirk on her face was really pissing me off.

"That's none of your business." I snapped, heading towards my room.

"Oh, come on." Sakuya said sweetly, grabbing my arm to stop me from moving. "You can tell me. I won't tell anyone else."

I frowned at her. Maybe she could be useful. She was a medic, after all, and she was able to figure out Song's disorder. Would she know how to cure it?

"Come on, I'll make some tea and you can tell me all about it."

"Fine." I sighed.

She seemed surprised by my agreement, but a moment later it was replaced by a grin. "Great! Come on in!"

She dragged me to her own room. I sat on her couch while she started to boil some water.

"So are you finally ready to admit to it?" She asked, sitting down beside me.

I glared at her. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh come on! You know, how—"

"Doesn't matter." I snapped, cutting her off before she could say something horrible. "I need your help."

"Girl trouble?" She asked with a little smirk.

"Damn it! Take this seriously!"

To my surprise, she sighed. "Sorry. You're just too cute when you're angry."

I growled at that. She obviously wasn't taking this very seriously.

"Alright, alright." She raised her hands in defeat. "No more teasing. What do you need help with?"

I looked searchingly at her face, relaxing when I realized that she was finally serious. "Song and I made a deal."

Sakuya was silent, waiting for me to continue.

"My end of the deal was that I would teach her to speak again. I've been trying for the last few days, but nothing's working and I'm all out of ideas."

"What's she doing for you?" Sakuya asked.

I frowned at her. "None of your business."

That warranted a raised eyebrow. "I could infer a _lot_ of things from that, Soma." She said with a mocking smile.

"I thought you were being serious now." I reminded her, annoyed and wondering what the hell I was doing here.

"Right." She was back to business again. "So you're trying to teach Song how to speak again. That's quite an ordeal, alright. So you want my advice on how to do it?"

I nodded.

"Well what have you had her do?"

"Not much." I frowned, trying to remember. "For the first couple nights we just talked, mostly about how I wasn't dead. Tonight I tried to get her to write letters about what her parents would have said."

Sakuya didn't seem impressed. "I can see why that didn't work."

I swore. "Well, I'm no psychologist"

"Do you think I am?" Sakuya pointed out gently.

"No." I grumbled.

She smiled. "But I think I have an idea at least. You need to find the exact cause of the disorder and work on easing that."

"It was her parent's death, and then her foster father's death." Why was she asking such an obvious question?

"Then defeating that Borg Camlann and a Quadriga, because I'm pretty sure the missile she described was from a Quadriga, should have cleared it up, right?"

I was surprised. It made sense, but somehow I thought that her problem was deeper than that.

"There's something more, and you need to figure that out before you can fix it."

Something in her expression made me feel like she had an idea of what it was.

"You know, don't you?" I growled.

She smirked slightly. "I have a hunch."

"Tell me." I snapped.

Sakuya just seemed amused, completely unfazed by my anger. "Well then. How about you make a deal with me?"

"A deal?" I gritted my teeth. What was it with women and trying to make crafty deals that only benefitted themselves?!

"Don't worry. It's nothing bad." The amusement never faded from her eyes.

"Our definitions of bad are quite different." I grumbled.

She giggled at that. "Don't worry. You'll be fine. This will be easy for you."

"What is it?" I snapped, wanting her to just get to the point.

"Watch after her."

There was a moment of silence as I tried to process that…but I couldn't. I was expecting some huge, horrible thing, but this was beyond expectation. Watch after her? Wasn't I doing that anyway?

"I don't know why," Sakuya continued, "but I think you're the closest person to Song right now. She might seem friendly, but she only relies on herself. She's put up a shell and she thinks that she doesn't need her teammates for anything — and if she does rely on someone, she thinks it's because of a personal weakness. You're the closest one to her, so I want you to make sure that you're there to help her whenever she needs it."

I was the closest one to her? There was no way. Kota or Alisa were much better friends than I was. But I nodded anyway, thinking that if I protested Sakuya would find a worse deal to make.

"Alright." Sakuya smiled, happy by my agreement. "I already practically said what her real problem is…she doesn't have any trust. She's terrified that people will die because of her — because of a weakness of hers. It's no wonder that she would believe that one simple thing, like a voice, could cause or stop death. She needs that security barrier. She believes that her parents' death was her fault, and the only possible cause was her voice. She doesn't trust people. She thinks that they'll just die. If you can get her to trust in people's ability to live, maybe she'll no longer need that security barrier and she'll speak again."

* * *

Phew, another chapter! Hehe. Italy was nice, if a little rainy. Oh well, still lots of fun! The homework after coming back wasn't any fun, though. .

Anyway, till next time! Thank you all for reading!


	38. XXXVIII

XXXVIII

**Song**

"You better return that disc to Sakaki." Soma said.

I stopped writing on my hand. For a second I wondered what he was talking about…and then I remembered the disc that the doctor had dropped, the one that had revealed Soma's past to me.

"Keep writing." Soma growled, and I dutifully returned to my task.

Although I honestly wondered what the point of writing 'trust' in black permanent marker all over my hand was supposed to accomplish. My left hand was almost completely covered in the black ink.

Trust…what the hell was that supposed to mean?! He hadn't even explained it to me!

I finally finished the word, nearly sighing at the way everyone would notice me hand. How would I hide it?

"That should be enough for today." Soma said. He tossed me a pair of black gloves, thank god. "Go and see old man Sakaki now, and whatever you do, don't tell him you saw the tape. He'll already know, anyway."

I frowned as he retreated, leaving me in relative peace. Slipping on my new gloves, I rifled through my drawers until I found the disc. It was still early in the day, but surely Doctor Sakaki couldn't be too busy.

X

"I'm so sorry. So you picked this up for me? I owe you one."

As I had thought, Doctor Sakaki wasn't busy at all. When I'd entered, he'd simply been standing and checking out some of the equipment behind his desk.

I realized that it had been a while since I'd been here. The room hadn't changed much. There was still a dizzying amount of computer screens, all showing different information, gathered around a plush red chair. Two couches rested in corners of the room, tables stacked with books placed in front of them. The large screen he'd used to give us our lectures was nowhere to be seen.

"Needless to say, you didn't watch it, did you?" Sakaki continued. "It's nothing, really. Just memories from my youth."

I shook my head, returning his sort-of-lie with one of my own.

"Oh wait, I'm glad you're here. The things is, I have a favour to ask of you. I'd like you to obtain the core of a certain Aragami. The director asked me to assign you this task while he's away."

The Director's away? Oh right. Soma had mentioned that he'd flown off to Europe. I suppose that that meant that it was Sakaki's duty to watch over the Branch while he was gone. Wait…did this mean that this was supposed to be a special mission? I was nervous, to say the least.

I was so embroiled in my thoughts that I didn't see the Doctor until he was standing right in front of me, too close for comfort.

"No one needs to know about this," He warned, making me shudder, "especially not the director or your advisor."

I was about to agree when he leaned forward suddenly, making me have to nearly bend backwards to avoid his head smashing into mine.

"You see, I've already asked Soma for the same favour… And I'd really like the two of you to take care of this somehow."

_Don't fall oh god he's so close don't fall why's he all in my face?!_

My back ached from the strain of keeping my balance in such a delicate position and my thoughts raced.

He drew back and I nearly breathed a sigh of relief, relaxing back into my normal position.

"If I recall, you've just been promoted to Leader, haven't you? Congratulations." Sakaki said with that omnipresent smile of his. Then he switched the subject as suddenly as his congratulations had come. "I'm curious… Have you ever heard of the Managarm Project?"

Oh god. How was I supposed to answer that? Soma had said that Sakaki would know for sure that we'd watched the video. So there was no point in lying…right? I nodded.

He turned away, which would have seemed an expression of sadness if his face didn't lose that smile. "I have to tell you, there was nothing elegant about that experiment… I even lost a dear friend…" He turned back to me, his voice serious. "And Soma, who was left behind, may be shouldering that negative legacy all on his own… And I myself…I am one of those whose actions warranted Soma's hatred."

And then he was back to leaning forward, forcing me to bend backwards again. Did he have any idea how nerve wracking this was?!

"I'd like if you could somehow befriend him… Please."

At that I smiled, despite the horrible position I was in. I was already trying my best at that. Besides, Doctor Sakaki's words just made me even more determined to help Soma.

"Ah, then let's jump right in." Sakaki retreated to his chair, tapping some things into his computer. "Let me tell you about the mission… I need help getting rid of a Vajra and Borg Camlann in the Old City. I have a research team there, but there's been no progress because of the Aragami. I'm counting on you! Oh, and take a Freeze weapon!"

I nodded. I had a Freeze Long Sword that would do just perfectly. It had been a while since I'd last used my Ice Katana.

"Right, I'm counting on you." Sakaki waved me away. "Now go find Soma and tell him you're ready to start the mission. I expect the both of you home by supper time!"

X

Oh sure, just go find Soma. I'm sure it would be easy.

I growled in frustration for the fifth time in the last 30 minutes. I couldn't find him anywhere! I'd checked in his room, but no one had answered the door. He wasn't in the lobby, or the mess hall. I'd asked everyone in my unit but they hadn't seen him either.

_Damn it, where is he?! Did he go on the mission all on his own?_

What was I supposed to say to Doc Sakaki? Oh sorry, I can't go the mission because Soma's disappeared into thin air and I can't find him? I'm sure that would go over well with that crazy, personal space- invading doctor.

I checked the lobby again and ran into Kota.

-Have you seen him?- I asked him right away.

Kota grinned. "Still looking for him?"

I nodded sadly.

"Well maybe he doesn't want to be found." He pointed out.

I frowned at him. He went and sat down on the couch, which was empty, quite surprising for the usually bustling lobby.

-I need to find him.-

Kota raised an eyebrow. "Seriously? Are you that desperate?"

I frowned at him, unsure of what he meant. I was about to tell him that we were doing a mission together, but I stopped myself. Doc Sakaki had told me not to tell anyone. Darn it. How was I supposed to tell Kota how urgent finding Soma was?

"I mean, for the last few days we haven't hung out at all! I don't even know where you disappear off to! When I knock on your door there's no answer, and then you're not in the mess hall or the lobby." Kota made a pouty face. "Are you spending all your time with Soma?"

Well, that _was_ technically true, but I wasn't about to admit it. -Sorry. I've just been really tired.-

Now it was Kota's turn to frown. "Are you doing solo missions again?"

I shook my head vigorously. Nope, I'd learned my lesson this time. No more soloing until exhaustion, unless my next "secret mission" ends up leaving me alone.

"Okay, good. I don't want to ever see you do that again." His parental scolding ended abruptly, the pouty face returning. "But Sooooooong! We need to hang out more!"

I smiled. Yeah, hanging out with Kota would be nice. With Soma I always had to be on guard, but Kota was so ridiculously nice. Sure, he made little jabs once and a while, but to be honest most of them flew over my head…and he made them as jokes, not to be really mean.

"But you'll have a hard time catching up to me and Alisa in Bugarally episodes!"

-Catch up?-

"Yeah! You see, Alisa and I—" He suddenly stopped, his face growing red. "Um, er…"

What was this all about? I gave him a questioning look.

"We're kinda, er…" Kota flinched, then sighed. "Um, never mind! Maybe I tell you later!"

His sudden silence worried me until I felt Soma looming over me. I looked up and behind to see his angry face.

"I've been looking all over for you." He growled.

I frowned. -I was too.-

He seemed surprised, but then sighed. "Whatever. Are you ready to go?"

Kota pouted as I stood and signed goodbye to him. He still said it back, at least.

"Oh yeah, nice gloves!" Kota yelled just as I entered the elevator.

* * *

Phew, sorry for the later chapter! I've been busy with school and such. ^^ (and League but shoosh don't tell anyone)

Anyway...not much to say here. Thank you all for reading and for your continued support! See ya next time! :D


	39. XXXIX

XXXIX

**Soma**

"Ready?"

Song nodded as an answer to my question.

I sighed. "I can handle this alone, you know."

She gave me a _look_, as if she doubted me. I bristled at that look.

"Look, I've been handling Sakaki's missions all on my own for a long time. I have no idea why he assigned you to help me."

She seemed amused, and I was suddenly afraid that she was taking lessons from Sakuya. -I'm not doubting you.-

"I— What?" I had honestly been expecting to have to defend myself more, but she'd backed down immediately.

-You could probably handle this mission on your own, but for better or worse I'm here too. So why not enjoy the company?-

I frowned at her. "Because I don't enjoy company."

She giggled at that, as if I'd made a joke. -Then let's get this over with.- She picked up her God Arc, leapt off the ledge and into the City of Mercy.

X

I would never admit to Song that I did enjoy the company. Hell, technically it wasn't even the company that I was enjoying: it was the fact that killing off a Borg Camlann and a Vajra was a lot easier with two people. Usually I came out of that mission with a few bruises, my Restore Pills completely depleted.

Another thing that usually bothered me about company was that they always got in my way. On the rare occasions when Sakaki allowed a fellow to come along on the mission, they would always somehow interfere with what I tried to do. There were times when they'd attracted Aragami attention while I was trying to be stealthy, or, if they were a Gunner, they would shoot me as I was trying to get in close.

But with Song there was none of that.

I'd known as much from the missions, but it still managed to surprise me. Even when we were going for the same target on the Aragami we didn't even trip over each other. If I got hit she would manage to distract it long enough for me to recover. She was right about one thing: it was a lot less stressful than doing it alone.

Not that I'd ever tell her that, though.

X

**Song**

"Well! Sorry to keep summoning you."

I held back a groan, leaning back once again with Sakaki's face much too close to mine. I'd just gotten back from my mission with Soma, and now this? I was still sore from our last encounter! I definitely did not want to go on another mission like that — sure, Soma and I had worked together pretty well, but it was still tiring to have to take down a Borg Camlann _and_ a Vajra with just the two of us. Despite my misgivings about another mission, I had the sinking feeling that what was coming up next was another assignment under the pretext of "Director's away so he asked me to assign this but don't tell him!"

"But I have a special favour to ask of you today…"

Yep, definitely a mission.

"As always, I'll be sending you on an Aragami extermination mission. The team for this mission will be Sakuya, Alisa, and to complete the group…Kota." Sakaki announced.

I allowed myself to smile at that. At least I had my full team this time. Plus, Kota had complained that we weren't spending enough time together, so mission with all of us and without Soma would surely make him happy!

"Oh, and there's no need to worry about mustering any more troops. I'd done some contriving to make this seem like a routine mission."

That almost made me frown again. This special missions were just getting more and more suspicious. I'd seen from the video that Sakaki was supposed to be an observer of sorts, but his meddling sure didn't seem like what a "Stargazer" would do.

Finally he straightened, giving my tired back a rest. "That's all from me. The mission will be tomorrow, seeing as you seem to need some rest. The Aragami can wait, I'm sure. I'm looking forward to the results."

Taking that as my dismissal, I left the room and headed towards the mess hall for a late supper.

"Wait, Song!"

I turned around to see Kota running towards me with a grin. That brought a smile to my own face, although I was a little worried about what he wanted.

"Glad to see you're back from wherever you went! Geez, you look tired. I'm guessing it was some kind of mission, right?"

I nodded.

"Well I guess you should relax, then! Here, come watch some Bugarally with Alisa and I!"

I gestured towards the mess hall, making a signal that I was going to eat.

"You haven't eaten yet?!" Kota screeched, and I winced. My ears were still a little sensitive from the Vajra's roars. Then he relaxed. "Oh yeah, the mission. Well, let's grab something quick and head to my room!"

X

I was surprised at how tense the atmosphere in Kota's room was. Usually watching Bugarally was calming for all of us. Instead, there was a crazy uneasiness between Kota and Alisa.

And, worst of all, I was between them.

They were seated at opposite ends of the couch. Neither of them were looking at each other, or at least trying not to. At this point I wasn't even sure that they were watching the show anymore. I wished Kota never would have found me and that I could have eaten my meal in peace.

Still, despite the tension it didn't seem like they were angry at each other. So what could possibly be causing it?

Alisa opened her mouth to say something. I turned to her, but she shut it immediately.

Wait a second. Was I the one causing the tension?! What did I do?!

Kota shot a desperate glance at Alisa. Alisa gave the look right back at him. It was terrifying being stuck in the middle like that.

The desperate look turned into Kota murmuring "Just do it!" as if I wasn't even there. Alisa shook her head violently. Kota started gesturing at that point. I'd never seen him so agitated.

"Song," Alisa suddenly said, and I saw Kota breathe a sigh of relief, "Kota has something to tell you."

Kota froze, making a high-pitched wailing sound. Then he caught himself and countered: "Err yeah. I need to tell you that, uh, Alisa has an announcement for you!"

That made me sigh.

"Man up, Kota!" Alisa growled, seeming to forget that I was between them again.

"Ladies first!" Kota protested.

At that, I raised both of my hands, shutting them up immediately. They both watched anxiously as I signed: -How about you both tell me?-

They give each other a sidelong glance. Finally Kota stood, going to sit beside Alisa and taking her hand in his.

Okay, what was this about?

Kota cleared his throat, squeezing Alisa's hand as if it were a lifeline. "Well, uh, Alisa and I…"

He trailed off, looking terrified.

Alisa finished for him. "Kota and I are going out."

Huh?! Kota and Alisa? The most unlikely couple in the world?

"Uhhh…say something, Song." Kota grinned sheepishly.

They wanted my approval. I could tell by their faces. But why did they need me to approve or not? Was it because I was leader?

I smiled. Really, I saw no problem with it. -That's great!-

There was no denying their expressions of happiness.

* * *

OH MY GOSH I'M SO SORRY THIS IS SOOOOOO LATE

Thing is, school's been kicking my butt lately. :( We're approaching the final month, and grad (yup, I'm finishing high school this year). When I don't have homework I'm completely drained from school. I don't even think about writing, really. That's why it took so long for this chapter to be finished and that's why it's a little...iffy. So yeah, updating may be more spaced out like this again.

But do you know what's crazy?! In about a month this story will be a year old! Gosh, that's scary. I should really kick myself in the butt and finish it. And then there's the sequel...geez. From now on I think I'm gonna put a little less on each emphasis on each event of the game (because let's face it, there are A LOT of events that aren't strictly necessary to the plot but are good for character building, which I'm hoping that I'm doing anyway).

So thank you all for sticking with me so long! I'm really sorry that I've hit such a rough patch. Maybe when school ends I'll be able to concentrate more...well, if I'm not freaking out about college. XD


	40. XL

XL

**Song**

_Sorry to bother you again! Think you can get rid of a Vajra and a Chi-You for me? Should be easy enough with a Blaze weapon. They're at the Temple Ruins. That place used to be so pretty…_

Sakaki had gotten a little distracted while writing the mission specifications, but he still managed to get his point across. A Chi-You and a Vajra in the Tranquil Temple. The Chi-You was weak to Blaze and Freeze, with the Vajra being weak to Blaze, Freeze, and Divine. Sakaki recommended a Blaze weapon, but a Freeze one would do nicely too. That left me with a choice between my Ice Katana and Tail Sword: Maple. I decided to take the Tail Sword because it was slightly stronger.

"Ready?" Hibari asked, and I nodded. She clicked a couple of keys on her computer and a "Taken" icon appeared beside the mission name on the screen. "Good luck!"

I nodded, heading off towards the God Arc Holding Facility with my team behind me.

X

"This will be easy!" Kota exclaimed the moment the Vajra collapsed and heaved its final breath. "One down, one more to go! And we're all in good shape!"

"Don't let your guard down 'til the end." Alisa warned, but instead of her usual snobby tone I thought I detected some real warmth behind it. Interesting.

"We should be able to find the Chi-You pretty easily." Sakuya said. "So let's stick together. Is that alright with you, Song?"

I nodded. When no one moved, I took the lead in the search.

We were headed up the steps, towards the temple itself when the Chi-You came swooping in. The loud clatter of our footsteps must have alerted it to our presence.

"Let's go!" Kota yelled, firing off a plethora of bullets.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

X

Kota was right. Taking down the Chi-You was easy. The only difficult part about it was the merry little chase it brought us on. When we finally took it down it had headed down the flight of stairs by the temple and had come to die by a little frozen pond. My team spread out and guarded me as I prepared to devour its core.

"Hey, hold up!" I heard Sakaki's voice.

What the hell was he doing here?! I stopped my devour, turning and seeing him and Soma walking up the steps behind us.

"Huh?" Sakuya gasped.

"Doc, what's it doing here?" Kota asked.

"I'll explain later." Sakaki answered, coming to a stop along with Soma. "Just leave that Aragami alone, and come over here for a second, will you?"

I shot Soma a questioning look but he turned away. When my team turned to me for guidance I shrugged and walked towards Sakaki.

Seeing my approach, he led us about half-way down the stairs again before pressing himself against the wall, peering out at the dead Chi-You. I held my God Arc in Gun Form at the ready — I didn't know what the Doctor was expecting, but I was going to be ready for it.

I saw Sakaki pull a pocket watch out of his coat from the corner of my eye. He glanced at it impatiently and then, suddenly, there was a blur of white before a figure stood on the Chi-You's corpse.

I jumped, very nearly pulling the trigger. Sakaki, noticing my reaction, looking up and made a sound between a gasp and a happy exclamation. "It's coming!"

Soma tensed up. I watched the figure that looked like a little girl bend down and…

I swallowed. What was a little girl doing, tearing at the Aragami's corpse?!

Soma rushed out and we all followed him, surrounding the girl with our God Arcs pointed towards her.

The girl turned slowly to us, the full moon rising behind her head. I shuddered. No, this wasn't a girl. It was something else entirely.

What I had mistaken for white hair wasn't hair at all; rather, it looked like some kind of solid material, almost like her skin. She wore what looked like a tattered Fenrir flag as if it were a dress. No human could survive in this weather wearing only that. Besides, what was probably the most incriminating was the fact that she had torn off a bit of the Chi-You's wing with her bare hands. Not even I could do that. So what was she, exactly?

"Uh…" She said in a quiet, innocent voice. "I…am…hungry…?"

"Whoa!" Kota screamed, his hands shaking as he held up his gun higher.

The girl stared at him, completely unafraid despite the gun levelled at her. No. She was definitely not human.

"Well, now!" Doc Sakaki bellowed amiably, breaking the tension. "Good to see you! So you finally decided to show yourself!"

He came to stand beside me, that smile of his on his lips. "Soma, thank you for bringing her here. I can be with her now…thanks to you!"

Soma glared at him, completely ignoring the second questioning look I'd sent him today. "No need to thank me. But how about an explanation?"

"Well, since she was being stubborn about not showing up, I eradicated what she's been feeding on in this area."

I looked at the girl. She seemed somewhat confused about what was going on, slouching so that her arms hung and swung before her. So she was eating Aragami? Could that mean…could she be an Aragami?! No, it didn't make sense! She looked exactly like a human!

"Even the pickiest of eaters can't ignore the pangs of hunger, right?"

Soma looked surprised, but that faded when he frowned at Sakaki. "Man! Your sneakiness, at least, has no peer."

"Um… Doctor…s-so who is this kid?" Kota stuttered.

"Oh, right, we shouldn't be chatting here like this… I'll explain everything in my lab. I apologize for keeping it from you all this time." He strode up to the girl. "You…you'll come with us, won't you?"

The girl nodded happily, chirping: "I'm ready to eat!"

She turned to Soma, who gave her a "huh?" in response.

The girl bent from side to side, waving her arms like a bird. "I was ready to eat?" She asked uncertainly.

* * *

DUN DUN DUN! Who could it possibly be?

Haha but anyway. Grad was this weekend. I was valedictorian, which means that I had to do a speech at the ceremony. :( That was so scary. Technically I've graduated from high school because I finished all my required courses, but I still have a month and a half left to make sure I have all the courses needed to get into college. CRAZY STUFF MAN.

I like how the roman numeral 40 is XL. This story's getting extra large I guess.

On that note, I'm considering merging two chapters together to make longer ones. There's still a lot of story to cover, so I think it would make sense before I start getting into chapters over 50. O.o They are quite short anyway. If I do that I think I'll still upload chapters the length they are now. I'll just call them .5s.

But anyway! Thank you all for your continued support and for putting up with my tardiness. XD


	41. XLI

XLI

**Soma**

"Huh?" Everyone yelled, all jumping back from the Aragami girl. Well, except for Song. She just flinched, saying nothing. Instead of jumping back she simply held an arm in front of her as if to ward off an attack.

"Um…what did you just say?" Sakuya asked shakily. She was balanced on one leg, arms in the air.

"Uh, I'll say it as many times as necessary. This is an Aragami."

The Aragami just giggled, looking around at the surprised faces as if they amused her. It was seriously creepy how human-like her actions were.

"No…way… Holy…" Kota had his arms crossed over his face, stuttering in amazement.

"What? Oh…" Alisa said over him, looking down at the Aragami with fear.

"Now, now, calm down. This one won't prey on you, I promise." Sakaki said calmly. At that everyone relaxed a little, though they still were tense. "As you know, all Aragami share a trait known as 'Bias'."

Kota looked confused, so Alisa said, "An Aragami's unique tendency for predatory behaviour…" She glanced at Kota and saw that he still had a blank expression on his face. She continued, somewhat annoyed. "That's the thing our God Arc uses, isn't that right?"

"That's correct." Sakaki sounded pleased that at least one of the rookie listened to his lectures. "I'm sure that's common sense for you Gods Eaters."

"…Did you…?" Kota asked, turning to me.

"Of course!" I growled. Only an idiot wouldn't know that. Besides, that was what made me a monster in the first place…

If Kota had been looking for sympathy he would have been better off asking Song. She looked confused, but was doing a better job at hiding it than Kota was.

"This Aragami's Bias seems to be directed at other Aragami of a higher order." Sakaki continued. "We humans don't even fall to the category of food, as far as she's concerned. It's a common misperception… Aragami aren't born with characteristics of other life-forms. Rather, they evolve at a breakneck pace through Devouring. As a result of that, their diverse evolutionary potential is condensed into a very short period of time. And that's what makes an Aragami what it is!"

"You mean this child…" Sakuya trailed off.

"Right. Just like humankind, they temporarily got stuck in a dead end in their process of evolution. She's an Aragami evolving much like a human."

"A human-like…Aragami, you mean?" I grumbled, hating how similar I was starting to seem to this Aragami. She was nothing more than an Aragami parading in human clothes. Nothing like me, right?

"Yes." Sakaki answered, seemingly unbothered by my anger. "Based on an examination I conducted earlier, the equivalent of her cranial nerves and synapses seem to be functioning exactly like a human brain. Clearly she's got an incredible capacity to learn. Quite an intriguing specimen!"

"Doc!" Kota yelled, raising his hand as if he were in elementary.

"Yes, Kota?" Sakaki asked, clearly amused.

"I think I got most of what you said…actually, it was mostly way over my head… Um… Exactly what does she mean when she says 'Food' or 'I'm ready to eat'?"

"Food!" The girl exclaimed, right on cue. That sent Kota in his ridiculous defensive stance.

"It sounds pretty ominous, coming from her…" Kota whispered nervously.

"Like I said, the Bias of an Aragami basically dictates that it will not partake of any being similar to itself. That said, in times of dire hunger — just now, for instance — she's likely to gobble up anything, no matter how unpleasant it may taste."

At that everyone jumped back another step, this time Song included.

The child Aragami grinned, as if she found it funny.

"But that's an exception to the rule." Sakaki said and everyone relaxed. "As you know, 'Aragami' is just a nickname, but there have been examples of multiple entities adopting the design of what we humans envision as 'The Gods'…these have been spotted worldwide. What thought process led them to adopt such a mode of life? By what process did they come to worship gods? Don't you find that intriguing?"

The Aragami simply sat there, looking nothing like the marvel of Aragami evolution.

"And this Aragami here, who has completely assumed a human form is an even rarer case, you see." Doctor Sakaki continued. "Oh, but I digress. Well, I think that should do it for this study group. One last thing. If you wouldn't mind, I would like to keep this a secret just between us… Are we agreed?"

So he really did intend to hide this from the Director.

"But…we'll have to report it to the advisor and the director…" Sakuya murmured.

"Sakuya…" Sakaki said sternly. "You're an exalted Gods Eater, and protector of humankind… And yet you intend to tell your superiors that I smuggled an Aragami into the Den, the headquarters at the battlefront?"

"Well, no… But why exactly did you do it?"

Suddenly Sakaki leaned over her, as was his habit. Song had a look on her face that told me that she'd experienced it too.

"Didn't I tell you before?" He exclaimed, the most agitated I'd ever seen him. "Because she's a valuable sample. She's merely the subject of an important personal research project, that's all. Don't worry, I made sure this room had its own communications infrastructure and security system: it's not linked to the other sections."

That crafty bastard.

"Now, I'm sure you wouldn't want anyone prying needlessly into your private affairs either, would you?"

Sakuya eyes widened. I don't know what she was hiding, but obviously Sakaki had gotten wind of it. He was extremely talented in the art of snooping, after all.

"Oh, and by the way… You and I are already accomplices in all this." Sakaki said, returning to a normal standing position and giving Sakuya room to breathe.

"Ready to eat!" The Aragami girl exclaimed. I saw Song flinch.

No. No matter how hard this Aragami pretended, she wasn't human. She was nothing like me.

"I'd like you to be her friend." Sakaki said. I growled at that, but he continued anyway. "You too, Soma…please look out for her."

"Don't be ridiculous!" I snapped. "She may be good at imitating humans…but she's still a monster."

I let that hang in the air as I stormed out of the room, feeling many pairs of eyes and hearing Sakaki's sigh.

As I headed towards the elevator, I heard footsteps behind me. Assuming they were Sakaki's, I didn't even bother turning around until the door clicked open and I walked.

Song managed to squeeze into the elevator with me just as the doors closed.

"What do you want?" I growled.

She didn't answer, going to lean against one of the walls. The elevator began its ascension, groaning the entire while.

After a moment she signed: -An Aragami, huh?-

"Whatever." I growled, not in the mood for some dumb small talk.

She made a face at my response. A second later she seemed to slip into her "Leader mode". Which meant that she was probably going to become a lot more brave and annoying.

-You're not a monster.-

"I'm not in the mood for this." I snapped just as the elevator doors opened for my floor.

Of course it was Song's floor now too, so I was followed by her down the hallway. To make matters worse, she managed to force herself into my room before I could slam the door in her face.

"Get the fuck out of my room." I snarled.

She narrowed her eyes. -You do this to me all the time. It's my turn.-

I gritted my teeth. That was true, but I really didn't want her in here. Not now, not ever.

She didn't seem bothered by my anger at all, going to sit on my bed. She smoothed the wrinkles out of the blankets beside her (unlike her, I only made my bed right before I went to sleep) as if she had suddenly lost her nerve. But she proved me wrong when she took her notepad out of one of the pouches lining her hip and started to write.

I tried to look away but she still managed to catch my gaze with her words.

You're not a monster. That thing sitting in Sakaki's lab is. You aren't.

I glared at her, but she didn't budge. She just stared me down with intense eyes. There was nothing I could do. I growled, turning away from her long enough to take a beer from the fridge.

I heard the faint scratch of her pencil but I drowned it out by taking sips from my beer. The scratching stopped, but I still didn't turn around. I was tired of dealing her.

There was a sudden tearing sound and something hit me in the back. I whirled around to see a tiny paper airplane lying on the ground in front of me.

Song gestured for me to open it. When I just frowned at her she stood, shrugged, then left the room.

I growled to myself. There was no way in hell that I would open it. No way.

Unfortunately it was in my hands and opened before I had time to convince myself not to do so.

Don't you dare compare yourself to an Aragami!

Swearing, I crumpled the paper into a ball and tossed it in the garbage.

* * *

Late late late! Gosh, I'm so sorry. :/ I'm falling into my bad habit again.

I swear it's not my fault. Exams will be starting soon, so a lot of my time is spent helping my friend study. Not to mention that I've been going through some tough times lately... I'll save you the details, but basically it means that updates are sparse.

I'll try to update a couple more times during the month, but because my last exam is on the 24th and I start work the day after, there's not guarantees.

But anyway! Thank you all so much for putting up with me and have a marvelous day!


End file.
